Tree Decorating 101

I'm home today with my family and we are decorating the tree... once it meets my standards for straightness and having the rightside facing the right part of the Living Room, that is. Apparently no one wants to decorate the tree with me. Something about me yelling at them if the decorations aren't spaced properly- ridiculous accusations. Although I think it is probably better if I do it myself. SOME people in this famiy don't realize the importance of not having two Santa ornaments next to each other.

Here is a picture of me calmly telling my brother to make sure that longer ornaments be put on branches with more space underneath of them:



Now I want to make it clear that I am not the only person fanatical about Christmas in my house. My Mother has nearly every square inch covered in decorations. She has over 20 boxes of ornaments. This was my Father's expression in Canadian Tire when she approached him with a wreath made of little stuffed snowmen:




Well, back to work. Hope everyone else's first day of Advent is as eventful and fun-filled as mine.

The DaVinci Codex

I have made a startling discovery. While many are now aware of the new theories surrounding the "Quest for the Holy Grail" (that being; that the incorrect interpretation of sangrail "san grail" is not actually meant "holy grail" but "sang rail" or "royal blood"). A similiar revelation has come forth about the online community and the quest for the holy website.

For years now we, in the online community, have been striving to create websites that are entertaining, funny, perhaps informative, but we have been lead astray. You see the ancient term WEBLOG has been misinterpretted now for many years to mean "we blog". Thus suggesting that in order to achieve the truly enlightened web page we must all create blogs.
I however, see another interpretation: Web log.

Does it make a difference? Whether you're keeping a blog or a log (as in a diary or record of your day to day activities?)

Well let me ask you this: blog and borg sound pretty similar, while Captain Picard keeps a Captain's Log. So who's side are you on? Captain Picard's or the borg's?

I rest my case.

JUDGE: You rest your case?
LIONEL HUTZ: Oh, no I just thought that was a figure of speech. Case closed.



Simpsons's trivia for the day:

Why does Judge Snider "have it in" for Lionel Hutz?

Live from York

When I work 8-4s at ErinOak I usually have to get my butt out of bed at around 6 in the morning. So what, you might ask, would possess me to stay up until 1 on Saturday night when I was in the midst of these early shifts?





So worth it.


Although, I suppose I have just provided evidence that it was not, as I could simply have waited 2 days and seen it on YouTube.

Damnit.



*************************

Also for anyone who didn't get to go the screening:



Did you see me? If not, it's obviously because I was so "there" that you didn't even realize it was me. Either that or you need to go back to the last 20 seconds or so of the clip and look in the bottom right hand corner of the screen and kind of re-focus your eyes a little.

I can't sleep and here's what I think 1: Qui'gon and the Menace

I think I might be mentally disturbed. Allow me to explain.

I have a thing for men doing a really good job at acting. This has to be my nerdiest turn on. I can see an actor do any number of movies and think nothing of him (in terms of physical attractiveness), but if he delivers a particularly impressive performance I'm suddenly drawn in by something a little more. My classic example is Willem Dafoe. Not perhaps a typical Hollywood hunk, and yet when I watched American Psycho it was not Christian Bale I was checking out.
I say this, not because anyone wants to know about my (no longer secret) crush on Willem Dafoe. In fact I'm sure that's information everyone could have lived without. I am simply trying to explain my next, far more peculiar confession.

You see I have just finished watching Schindler's List for the first time. Now really I can't imagine who watches Schindler's List more than once apart from a few characters in the second part of "The Raincoats" episode of Seinfeld. Which brings me to my revelation. I am really attracted to Ralph Fienne's ability to act. And anyone who watches Schindler's List and thinks "Gee I think I'd really like to have sex with Ralph Fiennes" is probably emotionally disturbed.

Actually, I think that's far less disturbing than what I found out later on ImdB. Fiennes did not get the Best Supporting Oscar that year. After expressing a 14 year late outrage at this fact I amused myself with images of the audience reacting to "And the winner is Tommy Lee Jones, The Fugitive" that night in the Kodak theatre.

It's getting late. I should try to sleep again. Or at least do something more useful than this.

That paper-clip necklace I was working on is more useful than this.

PS: Anyone who "gets" my title, not only gets 300 Liz Points for reading my blog regularly enough to pick up on my reference to my "I've Been Drinking and Here's What I Think" series (a literary masterpiece in the making), but is also nerdy enough to notice that all of them (save the first two) played on the titles of Star Wars Movies. You'll find Liz Points have very little commercial value, but I hope you enjoy them.

The Time (wasting) Machine

Childish as this is, I have a new toy. There's a site on the internet that will generate quotes from Shakepeare with whatever word you happen to type in. For example, if someone were to type in "refriderator" and the generator came up with "To be or not to be, that is the ********" then the quote is: To be or not to be, that is the refridgerator". Some favourites included:

"Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your iPod"
"For never was a story of more woe, than that of Juliet and her Liz" (a little bit of a twist ending there I'd say!)
and then of course with other random literary and film characters:
"Life's but a walking hobbit"
"The quality of mercy is not strained, it droppeth as the gentle Ewok from heaven upon the place beneath."

But this one required some evidence. For those who are fans of the "Penis Movie Game", I know you'll enjoy my total lack of maturity. Even if no one else will.

Come, you spirits
That tend on mortal thoughts! Unsex me here,
And fill me from the crown to the toe top full
Of direst penis.

Which work of Shakespeare was the original quote from?

Get your own quotes:

Although I should tell you that the first time I hit the button it came out with "Out damned penis! Out I say!" A close second.

In here life is beautiful

My favourite piece of mail of the year has arrived. The 2008 Stratford Festival guide came today and I could not be more excited.

At first glance ummm- well actually:

Festival Theatre:
Romeo and Juliet
Hamlet
Taming of the Shrew
All's Well That Ends Well
Caesar and Cleopatra (no not a typo- it's Shaw's play)

seriously?? I was on the verge of angry rebellion. A new artistic director and their first instinct was to pick the 3 most performed and run into the ground Shakespeare's- but oh wait!

Juliet ,and it appears her entire family, are played by african-canadian actors. Cool. I dig this for two reasons: 1) It brings a different angle to the classic story, that while I'm sure it's been done somewhere else before is fresh to me and is a good idea. 2) I once watched a Shakespeare Master's class tape in my Acting II where two students performed a soliloquy of Lady MacBeth's. Everyone agreed that the second girl (the black actress) performed considerably better than the first girl (the white actress). My immediate impression was, well that's no surprise. Because I'd wager a guess that she's had to work a whole lot harder to prove herself in the world of classical theatre which is traditionally dominated by white actors. Seeing Stratford make an effort to break from this tradition is at least a step forward.

Next up: Hamlet- Alright, truthfully I am going to see this regardless of... well anything. I love Hamlet and to see it done professionally at the leading North American classical theatre venue is reason enough to shell out the dough.

Taming of the Shrew- I will probably not touch with a ten foot pole, but I will assure you, it is not set in the wild wild west.

This year's best surprise for me however came in the form of its musical. I generally don't like musicals, especially at Stratford, but this year they will be doing Cabaret. Probably my favourite musical (putting aside my desire to see Avenue Q).

There is also a production of Trojan Women (which I am interested to see having been in a- ahem interesting production myself), Krapp's Last Tape, performed by Brian Dennehy (not to be confused with Brian Boytano), and a new experimental show called Shakespeare's Universe which is an interdisciplinary look at female roles in Shakespeare's plays. All in all I am assuming that this will take about a week to see everything and cost me roughly a billion dollars.

Thrift, thrift Horatio...

Back to the Futurama

Ok, I've been laughing outloud uncontrollably for 10 minutes.

Of the new Futurama DVD coming out at the end of the month David X Cohen says:

"While we're on the subject of additional content, sort of, I should elaborate on the DVD bonus features, because these have been little publicized even though we worked quite hard on them. So here they are...

A full-length 22-minute episode of "Everybody Loves Hypnotoad"..."

When I regained the ability to sit up straight, but still continued to giggle heartily I further read:

"Let me say to any hardcore fans out there who know what I'm talking about that there is slightly more to this than you'd expect. I am pretty interested to see how fans react to this one. I'd estimate that approximately 4% of viewers will consider this the greatest achievement in the history of mankind; the other 96% may experience emotions ranging from fear to confusion to discomfort and itchiness."

I can only tell you that I'm in that 4% having not even seen it yet. I am positive that it is the greatest achievement in the history of mankind. Long live the hypnotoad!

Hmmmm


I feel like I was supposed to remember something...















BART: Is it Guy Fawkes Day?

Candy Apple

I know some people really like their iPods, but this is ridiculous:



I also highly recommend this 3 part South Park episode Imaginationland. It's fantastic. In every sense of the word.

Bookbook

I have joined an online community called the Chapters.ca book club. Basically I go online and create a profile with my favourite books, list books that I'm reading, recommend books to others... it's basically Facebook with literature.

Which I guess would make it Bookbook.

In other news, I am off to see the Leafs tomorrow night with my brother. I can only hope that we maintain a greater level of maturity than with our recent outing to the Hamilton Bulldogs.

ANNOUNCER: Fans are reminded to watch for pucks flying into the crowd during play.
ME (looking around at the nearly empty arena): Really, the odds of a puck flying into the stands and actually hitting anyone has to be astronomical.

Best video ever. (like anyone could even know that)

Because I and I alone can harvest the power of the youtube, it is of course my duty to share EVERY cool video I come across.





Well OK, "cool" might be pushing it. Actually Scott recently got me really huge on using the word "cool":


ME: I want the Special Limitted Edition with deleted scenes and commentary and special features. It's going to be SO COOL-

SCOTT (in his best Intiago Montoya (sp?) of Princess Bride voice): You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Well played sir. Well played.

Speaking of Morgan Freeman Narrating Movies...

This might not be the best 30 Second Bunny Theatre but it has amused me the most of all.



They're dressed as Penguins! YES!

"You Either Get Busy Talking, or You Get Busy Dying" (Morgan Freeman in "The Narrator")

OK, fine. I accept that I am the only person on earth who didn't like this movie.

But hopefully I'm not the only person amused by this.

The Fesserton Precast

So here's the reason no one got calls or emails:

I didn't get into Second City.

I suppose I've just been on such a high note lately that I didn't really do much of a job bracing myself for this, and I was reasonably confident that I could get in.

Now I like to think of myself as being a reasonably good sport about this stuff. I mean I let it devastate me and I've been known to accuse (within a small circle of friends) the odd director of precasting, but I try not to delude myself into believing that I was somehow cheated out of my glory. And believe me, I am certain that the others who were selected were completely deserving of their place and I do not think that the Second City will forever be robbed of my remarkable presence :p

But... hmmmm here's the thing...

"Your audition was excellent, and you have a very good variety of theatre experience, but here are our recommendations before you audition for us again: take one of OUR courses. We have several levels and recommend that you begin with level A. We still have spaces open to register for the upcoming term if you like..."

The thing is, my Dad knows this woman who went through the A-E levels at Second City. Now my Dad tends to be absent-minded about what I've done sometimes, even when he's trying to promote it (ie: "Well you've got three summers experience with Easter Seals..." "Five Dad"). Based on what my Dad was telling her, and I'm assuming he didn't exaggerate anything, she said that I would most likely be able to skip the first few levels of the program. So I can't help but feel that I was not being given an accurate assessment of my skills, but rather being set up for a cash-grab.
Maybe I am just bitter about it, but fuck it. At least I'm not sitting around in a bar or treating myself to DQ with tears streaming down my face (thank you very much York U). Hm... I think I just figured out why I've been putting on so much weight...

Professional Camp Counselor!

Howdy all, just a little note to keep everyone up to date:

I got a job I had been pretty keen about as a Program Assistant for the ErinOak Kids Respite programs in (as the name thus implies) Mississauga and Oakville. I start training this weekend, and am extremely psyched.

I also had an audition today for Second City, I will update if I get any good news from them.

Otherwise, just get ready to get really sick of my respite "camp" stories.

Happy Banned Books Week!

I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. ~Voltaire

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

Everyone's job for the week: read one book that has been banned or is being/has been recently challenged.

"You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them." - Ray Bradbury

Top Ten Banned Books for the 20th Century.
I'm actually not SURE how accurate this list is. I couldn't get any data from the ALA, but I have cross checked with a couple of sites and this SEEMS to be the most accurate list:

1984
The Catcher in the Rye
Fahrenheit 451 (seriously?)
The Grapes of Wrath
Lady Chatterly's Lover
The Naked Lunch
Slaughterhouse 5
To Kill A Mockingbird
Tropic of Cancer
Ulysses

The reasons are always varied and hillarious.

I really enjoyed one story in particular of a group of school children receiving copies of Fahrenheit 451 with the words "hell" and "damn" blacked out.
My favourite reason for banning/challenging 1984 continues to be "pro-communist views". Have you even read...

Rose Darko: Do you even know who Graham Greene is?
Kitty Farmer: I think we've all seen Bonanza.

The best story of a book not on the list:

Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl. Anne Frank. Modern Library. Challenged in Wise County, Va. (1982) due to "sexually offensive" passages. Four members of the Alabama State Textbook Committee (1983) called for the rejection of this book because it is a "real downer".

I've yet to find a rencent challenge in Canada that has lead to a ban. Does anyone know of any?



A challenge is an attempt to remove or restrict materials, based upon the objections of a person or group. A banning is the removal of those materials. Challenges do not simply involve a person expressing a point of view; rather, they are an attempt to remove material from the curriculum or library, thereby restricting the access of others.
- The American Library Association

Most challenged books of 21st Century (2000-2005 seems to be most recent data):
(from the American Library Association)

1. Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling

2. "The Chocolate War" by Robert Cormier

3. Alice series by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

4. "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinbeck

5. "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" by Maya Angelou

6. "Fallen Angels" by Walter Dean Myers

7. "It's Perfectly Normal" by Robie Harris

8. Scary Stories series by Alvin Schwartz

9. Captain Underpants series by Dav Pilkey

10. "Forever" by Judy Blume


Something tells me that a good many of these books/authors are still high on this list.


"Oh Harry, don't you see?" Hermione breathed, "If she could have done one thing to make sure that absolutely every single person in this school will read your interview, it was banning it."

The Nightmare Before Halloween

Let me know if you think that this is just a touch strange:


VAUGHAN, Ont. - Nine mazes, 300 monsters, chilling rides and other attractions will transform Canada's Wonderland into a dark playground of terror on weekend evenings leading up to Halloween.


THE CANADIAN PRESS


The Halloween Haunt gates creak open every Friday, Saturday and Sunday night in October and on Halloween from 7 p.m. to midnight.

Guests are cautioned not to attend the event in costume. Because of the fear factor, it is not recommended for children.

Halloween Haunt ticket prices are $26.95 online and $21.95 for season pass holders online.

For more information, visit haunt.Canadaswonderland.com.

List Maker

My Top 10 Favourite Movie Scenes

10. Being John Malkovich- The three sit on a couch and Lotte and Craig both make a movie for Maxine

I just thoroughly enjoy the build-up and her reaction. My first in a line of many enjoyable Catharine Keener movie moments.

9. American Beauty- "It's just a couch"

I keep throwing cushions and yelling "these are just things" when my Mom tells me to be more careful with my coffee around her new carpets and furniture. She is not amused.

8. The Empire Strikes Back- Yoda lifts Luke's ship out of the swamp

Look at me, judge me by my size do you? *I've decided that this is also inclusive of the next two seconds of the following scene "Apology accepted".

7. Dr. Strangelove (or how I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb)- The final scene

This was probably one of the best laughs I've ever had. Even if I knew what was coming as a result of watching Homer Simpson break the rules by riding the bomb.

6. Spiderman- The Green Goblin realizes that Peter Parker is Spiderman

I heart Willem Dafoe, so it could be just that he can do anything, including cartoonish villainy and still have me totally impressed. He is just so damn evil in this scene and I LOVE it.

5. The Usual Suspects

Anyone who has seen the movie knows which scene. Anyone who hasn't, I will be giving too much away by giving anymore information. Also go see it. Now.

4. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire- The Graveyard

This is probably the reason I got so into the books this summer, just in time for 7. By the time I had seen this scene I had read up to book 6, and I am of course an adult, who ought not to be scared by children's movies. I spent the whole scene chewing my nails convinced I'd have nightmares.

3. The Meaning of Life- John Clease's Sex Ed Lesson

I do wish you'd listen, Wymer. It's perfectly simple. If you're not getting your hair cut, you don't have to move your brother's clothes down to the lower peg. You simply collect his notes before lunch, after you've done your scripture prep, when you've written your letter home, before rest, move your own clothes onto the lower peg, greet the visitors, and report to Mr. Viney that you've had your chit signed.

2. City Lights- The blind girl's vision is restored

I don't think an explanation is needed.

1. Big Fish- Edward Bloom falls in love

OK, so technically this "scene" lasts 30 minutes and takes up a huge amount of the movie. Still, I maintain that I Liz Buchanan also like Daffodils and music and am going college. Someday Ewan...


Honourable mentions go to: the scene in Bubba Ho-Tep where JFK explains to Elvis how he survived, the fight in Kill Bill between Elle and Beatrix and the scene with the missle in The Iron Giant (which never fails to make me cry).



10 Worst Movies I've ever been made to see and who I blame for inflicting that on me.


10. Under Seige (a bus full of Leafs fans, whose good taste ended there)
9. Sorority House Massacre (Becky)
8. Mrs Brown (Queen Victoria)
7. Red Zone Cuba (Mike Nelson and the creators of Mystery Science Theatre 3000, who to their credit, made the experience a lot less painful)
6. Mars Attacks (Auntie Brenda?)
5. Topsy Turvy (The Academy)
4. Paulie (Greyhound Canada)
3. Dude, Where's My Car? (Tammy)
2. Death of a President (I have only myself to blame. Shame on me. Sorry Andrew)
1. The Fast and the Furious (Caroline)

Nuit Blanche

In past 24ish hours my friend Emily and I have gotten up to some pretty crazy hi-jinx.


1) Second City Toronto's Facebook of Revelations

***.5/*****

Very very funny. Opens with a bang by previewing another Toronto area theatre production (from the producers that brought you Mama Mia, We Will Rock You and Dirty Dancing) "Safe Bet: The Musical". And is followed by Canada's finest sketch comedy. The energy stays consistent through the first half and most of the second half of the show and I had quite a few good healthy gut laughs.
While I don't recommend staying for the *cough* *ahem* "improv" the show itself is very enjoyable. You almost feel like SNL could still be saved.


2. The Royal Ontario Museum
****/*****

Apart from making a point not to visit the paper-weights exhibit we took in the vast majority of the ROM. I think I had forgotten just how much fun this place was:


The new "Crystal Age" entrance way and exhibit




The ceiling in the corridor of the "Staircase of Wonders". Yes, that's really what it's called.




I thouhgt this wall was pretty cool, but I think that the lack of flash did diminish it a touch



This next photo may be a little disturbing to some people, but it's too cool not to include. So, in an attempt not to expose anyone's fears on the world wide web, let me just say that Indiana Jones, Adam and Eve, Gryffindor House and anyone else who might have some a distaste for snakes should probably brace themselves.





OK, so you can kind of tell that it's fake. But it still looks pretty scary at first... er maybe just in person.


3. Eastern Promises at Rainbow Cinemas, Market Square
****/*****

Excellent movie, directed by David Cronenberg and starring Viggo Mortensen and Naiomi Watts. I was thoroughly impressed, and with the exception of a scene of graphic violence that actually moved me to laughter (because when it gets that disturbing what the hell else can you do?) the movie held together very strongly. It managed to create an very strong ambiance without sacrificing the pace, and there were a number of nice twists worked in to the plot to keep it exciting right to the end. Very highly recommended.


4. Nuit Blanche
*****/*****
After Emily borded her bus to return to KW, I headed back home, only to make the mistake/starting the exciting adventure of taking the streetcar down Queen St. Tonight is an event in Toronto called Nuit Blanche. Basically a whole bunch of art galleries and club are having all night events featuring art and music throughout the city. Queen is of course the craziest of it all, and it was literally bumper to bumper with people lining the streets. Naturally I got out to investigate, but found that there was just so much of being in a crowd that huge that I could take before I went nuts. I seriously think that the entire population of Toronto was in the streets tonight partying. There were drum circles, street dances, random video kareoke parties outside, performance art pieces on the sidewalk, illuminated art in the park. I think I had censory overload or else I would still be there right now.

Hmmm maybe I'll go back later...

Tedious Endless School and Learning

The most important thing I learned in class today: I'm not the only person who really isn't enjoying TESL.

You might think that a Theatre major would love to sit around in a class and talk about feelings and life experiences and debate whether or not the verb "to love" is an action verb on the basis of one's own comprehension of the word love. The truth is I do not. When it comes to school I enjoy concrete ideas, or at least discussions of abstract ideas within an academic context. Otherwise I'm left saying, as any English prof will... "SO WHAT?" So what's the point?

OK great, when you were growing up in another country and had to learn English you struggled with the grammar. That's a good experience to bring to the class, but now let's get critical about it. WHY? HOW did you learn it? WHAT would you do differently? Don't just tell me about your suffering, let's talk about it in a context that is applicable to the course. OK, so your niece said something cute the other day and that kind of loosely relates to First Language Aquisition theories... HOW? I am beginning to understand why a lot of companies will hire you on to go to Japan and give you crash courses in TEFL in two weeks.

Ricky Gervais has done it again

Okay, so I had seen a couple of clips from a strange show called "Extras" on youtube, and then last night I saw two episodes I'd seen get nominated for Emmys. I found myself cheering for a TV show I barely knew, and decided to get better acquainted with this wonderful program.

My favourite going in was this fantastic scene in which Sir Ian McKellan explains why he's such a good actor:




Also on youtube and highly recommended: Orlando Bloom makes his case for why he's obviously better looking and more popular than Johnny Depp, Daniel Radcliff makes it clear that he does not need glasses and is not still a virgin, Kate Winslet gives advice on how to conduct yourself during phone sex while wearing a nun's habit, and Patrick Stewart exclaims "You're not married, you don't have a girlfriend... and you don't watch Star Trek?"

Have I sold you yet? Go! Go!

High school is still weighing me down

I went to the website for the Royal Ontario Museum today to see if there was anything interesting on next week (as I may have my first visitor). Currently the ROM has an exhibit on Darfur, which while undoubtable depressing would also be extrememly informative and relavent. To my dismay, however, the exhibit closes on Monday. I checked to see what the next exhibit would be. It is a display of 19th and 20th Century Glass Paperweights. I couldn't have made that up.


Maybe I'm still just really bitter at glass paperweights because, unlike every other year in the history of Cayuga Secondary School, our graduating class received paperweights instead of proper plaques or trophies for graduation awards.

Think this:





With my name on it. Just incase I ever want to feel naustalgic and have my window open during a wind storm.

I follow him to, ahem "serve my turn upon him"

The rest is not yet silence...

I went to the official website for London's West End, as it is my hope to visit the UK at some point in the very near future. Thinking "Hey maybe I'll see Jude Law as Hamlet" I discover that alas no, it will not premier until 2009, and I'm not waiting that damned long.

But what should I discover opening in November... Othello with Ewan McGregor as Iago. Wow. I did NOT see that one coming. I think that I must see this. I am starting the "Liz needs to go to England fund". Anyone wishing to make donations please be certain that they are in GBP.


PS: This made me laugh. A lot.

From Overheard in New York

Are You Sure?

Child: Tia Jeanette, did you know that the tourist-ists brought down the twin towers?
Tia Jeanette: No, no, no, Anthony, it was the terror-ists.
Child: Ohhh...

"The whole world is just one big group work assigment. That's really God's cruelest joke. And what's worst? We're all getting an F"- loosely translated coversation with Bonnie Buchanan

That was simply brilliant Mom.

****************************************

So today I had a moral dilema. I went on the Toronto International Film Festival website, just to see if there were any rush tickets today for anything I wanted to see. There were... (deep breath) Cassandra's Dream. HOWEVER the tickets were for 11AM the same time as my class on Grammar and Linguistics. In retrospect "moral dilema" is pushing it. Prioritization malfunction might be a better sumation.

sigh

The phrase "Ewan McGregor is the sexiest man alive" has two nouns, a verb, an adjective, adverb and a preposition.

sob sob

I must focus on Friday. Because even if they try to schedule me for class on Friday I'M NOT THERE! :D

******************************************

In a final bit of news apparently Jude Law is going to play Hamlet at the Gielgud in London's West End AND he is going to be directed by nonother than.... (drum roll please)... Gilderoy Lockhart incarnate himself, Kenneth Branagh.
"Jude, the problem is that you aren't anywhere near loud enough. How are we supposed to know that Hamlet's upset if you aren't yelling?"

I don't feel that I can end on such a cruel and negative note. So ummmm.... the rest is silence.

(heh heh heh works everytime)

Literally

I found one of the greatest articles in the Toronto Star the other day, but it appears that I have put it in the recycler.
Some files were released by British Intelligence regarding spying activities in the 30s and 40s. The file of a prominent author who was being monitored, and under suspicion of communist ties during this era, due to the nature of his political writing was made public. That author was George Orwell.

That's positively... hmmm what's that word that's a literary reference to the government spying on people in order to control information... Or- something...

I mean I can see why this happened of course. Anyone who has read Animal Farm knows what a fondness Orwell had for Stalin and communism. And anyone who read that sentence and did not pick up on the thick sarcasm clearly has the mental capacity of a 1940s British Intelligence agent.

Apt

Bill Sanders once told me "I was born and grew up in Toronto, so I can only stand to be there for about 10 minutes". I replied "Bill I'm from Hamilton, try 5 minutes".

Hating Toronto. It's as much part of being born in Hamilton as childhood asthma, an inability to play football, and the desire for a hockey team we won't actually pay money to watch play. But I of course have a deep down envy of a city where if you miss one bus there is another one right around the corner and where a 24 hour business isn't limited to Walmart or a porno theatre. And of course a place which nourishes artists, musicians, actors and film-makers. Not to mention has concerts, festivals, museums, and live theatre to make any mildly cultured person just a little excited.

So here I am. A big city girl. I've been a city girl, a country girl, a northerner, and a Peterboroughian (which really has its own special classification), and now I am a Torontonian.

Ideal

Tonight I finally watched Bobby. Our generation needs a hero in a big way.

That is all I have to say tonight.



... except for this:

It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a person stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope,and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy, these ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.

Goodnight York, Goodnight Moon

Tomorrow I move to Toronto. But tonight I sleep in York.

Wheeee!

A new fascination has taken over my free time. It is: Nintendo Wii.

My family got one (of all people, my Mother was the one behind the aquisition) and I feel that it may be the world's greatest invention. Forget medical science and communications, I can swing a Baseball bat with my remote control!


Anyways, that is my excuse for taking so long to post photos from Stratford. Now it turns out that my computer is posting photos VERY VERY slowly. So without further adieu, I present you:

The Complete Stratford Trip (abridged)

"This is the short and long of it"



"And, like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve,
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind."




"How poor are they that have not patience!"





"When shall we three meet again, in thunder lightening or in rain?"



"If music be the food of love, play on!"



"Come, come, good wine is a good familiar creature if it be well used"
(Alright, admitedly I had to do a google of Othello quotes to find that one)



and finally...

"Exit, pursued by a bear"

The Quality of Mercy is Not Strained

This weekend I venture to Stratford Ontario to see The Merchant of Venice, To Kill A Mockingbird and Not I. With a weekend this theatrey life is good. Another thing that makes life good: being able to put videos on blogger with relative ease! I shall have to make some sort of film celebrating this on the weekend.

In the meantime:

Man and dog

"Hamilton to Sudbury One Final Time" A 3 Disc set

On my roadtrip to Sudbury I am taking with me (in a sort of particular order):

Elvis Presley
Phish
The Doors
The Who
CCR
The Beatles
The Clash
Jimi Hendrix
Janis Joplin
Joni Mitchell
Simon and Garfunkl
Don Maclean
Jefferson Airplane
The Velvet Underground
Nick Drake
The Ramones
Neil Young
Bob Dylan
Coldplay
The Eels
The Shins
The Flaming Lips
Greenday
Stars
Fiona Apple
Iron and Wine
The Dresden Dolls
Feist
Tegan and Sara
Metric
The Arcade Fire
Johnny Cash
June Carter
Wolf Parade
Dave Matthews
Tim Reynolds
The Dears
You Say Party We Say Die
The Dixie Chicks
the rest of The Dave Matthews Band
Ani DiFranco
The Decemberists
The White Stripes
Gnarls Barkley
Cat Power
Joanna Newsom
The Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Modest Mouse
They Might Be Giants

Mmmmmmm mix CDs.

See you on a Sudbury Saturday night!

I can still remember how that music used to make me smile

Ah the Festival of Friends; Hamilton's annual time travel to the 1960s/70s. This year my family made our annual trip, this time to see one concert in particular:



The small figure in the dark that you can't make out is Don Maclean. He's one of, what I call, the "Trip to Virginia Artists". Joni Mitchell, Bob Dylan, Van Morrison and Don Maclean make up an elite lot whose music I memorized on long car trips with my family. He played all of the songs I'm most fond of ("Castles Made of Sand", "Vincent" and his cover of Roy Orbison's "Crying") and some other big long song that I guess is sort of famous :P

I tried to add a sound clip, but as my luck would have it, it's not working. Blah. I will share it when I figure out how.

This one time at camp...

Famous Toronto Maple Leafs defenseman Tim Horton once said "They pay me to practice. I play for free". I adapted this saying during my days at Lakewood to "They pay me for pre-camp. I'm a counselor for free". Well I finally followed through and volunteered at Woodeden Easter Seal Camp for the Teen Session. I can't think of a better way to have spent the past 12 days.

Camp regulations prevent me from posting a number of photographs, but since Elliot's no longer a camper...



I used to have to be the one that bent down to hug in our picutres! The fairy wings are a gift from him for my role as "Hang time floater fairy".

Best moments of the camp:

1) Camper Codey telling me in broken-up speech that he won't come back next summer if I don't.
2) Camper Harry and I protesting Verbal Communication with a silent sit-in. It might have been my idea, but I think Harry was all for it.
3) This one is for Mike and Elliot: "You may have won this round Cerebral Palsy, but next time you won't be so lucky, mwa ha ha ha!". Mike in the midst of a spasm cried out "Damn you CP" I consequently turned this into a daily ritual of trying to smite CP with various schemes but being thwarted time and time again with cries of "Damn you Cerebral Palsy!"
4) Having the campers in Cabin Orange set up a "Liz duty" to guard me from stealing the tidy cabin flag.
5) Being trapped half-way across the zip line on the ropes course (suspended 50ish feet in the air) with my campers laughing hysterically at me.

More stories to follow (brace yourselves).
Hope everyone had a good week and a bit. It feels like it's been longer. That's camp for you! "The bubble convinces us that there was nothing before and nothing after."



*****************

OK, so uncamp-related. I had to add this. It's from a Facebook group called "The Mrs Weasley Appreciation Group". DO NOT join this group if you haven't finished reading book 7. It will spoil a big part of it for you. Just enjoy this picture, which can be appreciated by all:

Simspon's Trivia (Summer Blockbuster Special Edition)

Apparently the first version of this was too hard. Frankly I think that this version is plainly obvious to any football fan:
Two teams played for the Super Bowl in January 1992. If ______________ had won, Lisa would no longer have loved Homer.

BONUS: In the episode "Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie", what does Homer consider to be "The 3 Rs"?

Post #300

Ladies and gentlemen: I have a plan.

I have just been informed THIS moment that I have been accepted into Humber College's Post Graduate certification program in Teaching English as a Foreign/Second Language. It is a one year program that involves a full-time course schedule and a placement. At the end of it I will be certified to teach English abroad and in EAP/ESL classrooms in Canada. This will go a long way to helping me achieve my long term plans (traveling and working in Theatre and with people doing Drama). One of our early placements is leading a workshop style course in Humber's EAP program doing an activity (such as Drama) to encourage conversational English use. I am very excited to have this opportunity, Humber's program appears to be an excellent one.
Also, being in Toronto will allow me to keep a foot or two in the Theatre world. I am hoping to take courses with Second City while there and stay involved with amateur Theatre in the city. Then in a year I will either be very well prepared to do some traveling as an English teacher and get some money together to take a studio acting program (Atlantic Theatre Co./CSSD in London) or to work as an ESL/EAP teacher on contract as a part time job while acting. Beats the hell out of retail.

That's all for now, I will keep everyone up to date though!

The Books of Liz

This has turned into a long unfocussed rant. Enjoy :)



I missed leisure reading in University. It is nice to have it back in my life. I think it might be making me sane again.

He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.

Last summer I read Catch 22 for the first time, though it had been sitting on my "to read" list for some time. Within a chapter I was wondering where it had been all my life. Questions of war, death and human sanity vs insanity treated with dark humour and irreverrance (without the preachy morality of M*A*S*H*... book, movie or TV show included), it's about the only way I can deal with those issues. Sometimes I think that's why the Daily Show is so popular. Sometimes all you can do with something that horrific is laugh at it.

Have you ever wondered how you would go about teaching an elephant yoga?

Last December I read Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, by Christopher Moore. Of all the books I've read concerning religion and spirituality, curiously this strange fictional tale of a crude ultra-modern best friend to "Joshua" throughout his life's journey as the Messiah is the first one to make me actually want to be Christian. Not because I suddenly believe that there was a real "Biff" or that Jesus Christ learned Judo (seriously read the book), but because it's the essence of a story that penetrates the human consciousness, not its literal interpretation of what went on. Maybe Jesus wasn't a fun guy who got drunk off of the water he turned into wine and then declared that he loved bunnies (seriously read the book), but the idea of his kind heart and wisdom is what draws us to this story. His character is a hero, one who it doesn't do us any hurt to try to be like. I kind of wish we could just simply regard him as that, rather than fighting each other over whether believing every word he and the bible said is the only way to get into heaven.

There shall not be among you a witch

Which brings me very nicely to my most recent, ahem, literary endevour. Five years ago I picked up Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone for one reason, and one reason alone: To piss of the neo-conservative Christians in my school. I worked with one who told me I was right on my way to hell for reading about evil Pagan witchcraft. I told him that if it weren't for the medieval Pagans we wouldn't have many of the celebrations and feasts in our Christian tradition, including Christmas. This did not go over well.
Harry Potter and Christ. Well that's an essay in and of itself isn't it ;)

As we approach, what will be for myself and many other geeks, a sleepless Saturday morning reading I will talk briefly about my newest venture in nerdom.
Harry Potter joins Star Wars and Final Fantasy VI in my long list of REALLY uncool things I have tendency to obsess over on and off. I've recently decided that this is healthy for me, as I quite need a strong fantasy world apart from reality to keep me sane. And who doesn't love a battle of good vs evil? What I love about my particular choices is that all three series have an important message about good and evil. We all have both parts in us. We all have the potential to be good and evil, and it is our choices that define us.
I feel like we live in a culture that is increasingly inclined to either strict Locke or Hobbes philosophy, with little thought given to personal choice and responsibility. John Locke says that we are born carte blanche, and that it is society that corrupts man and turns him evil. Hobbes on the other hand believes that man is born evil and society is necissary to keep man from devolving into "continual fear and danger of violent death and the life of man: solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short".

I believe that we are born with both parts in us, and that our personal choices and actions reflect the good or evil in our person. People are not altogether good or bad they're just people.
For too long I played the optimist believing that if people were just educated enough or saw the world through other's eyes or opened their hearts they would ultimately do the right thing. It was quite damaging in the wake of 9/11 to keep trying to convince myself of this spiritually or morally. I simply saw too much evidence to contradict it.
I have spent the last few years wallowing in "I hate humanity" land. It's an easy place to be. If you think people suck, they don't usually disappoint you. It's easier to be angry at someone for being a jerk and just write them off as idiotic, than to try to see the good inside of them. It's a lot easier to find the bad than it is the good.
Finally, though, I think that I am coming to understand that people have the capacity for both and that this is a good thing.

"It is neither good nor bad, but thinking makes it so"

If there's one thing that I have never 'bought into' in Shakespeare's plays it's "Fate", the idea that some greater destiny is controlling the play and that people are absolved of their wrong doings because they were simply succumbing to their destinies (and all that we are evil in by a devine thrusting on :p).
The beautiful parallels that Rowling draws between Harry and Voldimorte to MacBeth are probably the strongest part of her writing (as far as an adult audience is concerned). If Voldimorte had not tried to kill Harry would the prophecy still have come true? Could MacBeth just have gone on home and ignored the witches and told his wife to take it easy? And when those events take place can the characters be held accountable for their actions, since it was indeed destiny? Well you know what I think by now :)


So do I think Harry willl die? Will he have to sacrifice himself to save the world from evil, as is told by the prophets... cies... ahem. Or does his Mother's death sheild him from harm as though he were not from woman born... cough ahem... don't mind that. Though I must ask... should we start calling Macbeth "He who shall not be named" in the theatre. :p

I'm done I promise.

I don't think he's a Horocrux, though I'm not quite sure about that scar itself.
If I'm worried about any characters dying it's Order of the Pheonix members (Lupin, Hagrid and the Weasleys especially). I see one of the Weasleys going, and Percy realizing that he's acting like a jerk, but being too late. If it's any of the kids, I worry about Luna, I quite like her, but I think it makes a lot of sense with her role in the series.
I feel that forgiveness will play a big role in the final battles. Both Snape, and even Voldimorte. Harry will have to play to his strengths, and Avada Kedaver isn't one of them.

So that said, I will not write about Deathly Hallows when I am done the book. Mostly because a number of you won't have even woken up to go down to the store and buy it by then. I promise I'll wait.

SO...

If anyone endured reading that, you probably know a little bit more about me than you may have, and hopefully appreciate that some of my geekdom is not simply for geekiness sake.

I leave you with a final thought that loosely ties it all together.

"Joe Bowers: There was a time when reading wasn't just for 'fags'. And neither was writing. People wrote books and movies. Movies with stories, that made you care about whose ass it was and why it was farting. And I believe that time can come again!" -Idiocracy

Brain Spotting

(Also known as "Brain Zaps" or my favourite: "Electric Brain Sensation", which let's face it would be an EXCELLENT band name.)


Lyrics from Legal Pharmaceutical Withdrawal land:

I wish that I was born a thousand years ago
I wish that I'd sailed the darkened seas
On a great big clipper ship
Going from this land here to that
On a sailor's suit and cap

Away from the big city
Where a man cannot be free
Of all the evils of this town
And of himself and those around
Oh, and I guess that I just don't know

I've tried to type a story to this like 8 times, but each one comes out sounding self pitying and/or needlessly angsty and bitter. Let me just explain that: No I am not recovering from a heroine addiction, but I think I might have some fraction of an idea what that's like at the present, as my brain seems to have formed a rather unhealthy chemical dependency on a particular drug that I no longer wish to take.

Yes, let's leave it at that until my head clears.





********************

Seriously, that was the least geeky looking picture I could find to do a rip-off. Ewan must think I'm so uncool.

"Oh, dear God. Can't this town go one day without a riot?"

I wish I could isolate the video for my blog... and edit the rest out. This is a link to the Spingfield USA challenge to be the "home" of the Simpson's movie premiere. Vermont won (all of the videos were pretty uninspired), but I am really sending you to view the video for Springfield, Massachusettets . It might seen pretty corny and odd at the beginning, but please hang on until near the end. It will be worth it. Trust me.

I feel that I have accomplished something here today.

For those who read my previous post, Ticketmaster has changed the picture. It is now in fact of Matt Good (they had a picture up of The Dave Matthews Band with a caption "Order Matthew Good tickets" and the picture linked to the Matt Good tour schedule). I can only conclude that Ticketmaster saw my post and realized their mistake was only making my thousands of readers (who are also fans of both bands and appreciate the irony, having read "At Last There is Nothing Left to Say") laugh at them. Mission Accomplished.

Cute as a bug's ear

There's a very funny new game at the Simpson's Movie site. You can create your own Simpson's "avatar" (just wanted to make it clear, their word not mine). I went right ahead and created a whole darn army!



Hope no one's offended, but they don't give you a lot of flexibility to create realistic portraits... did my best anyways.

40 Flicks

I'm actually kind of proud of that pun.

I have rearranged this SEVERAL times. In fact it will probably be rearranged again by the time I finish writing this.

Liz's Top 40 Movies of All Time

And what does my taste in movies say about me?

I'm not sure that I would take this as "Liz would rather watch Casablanca than Office Space" or "Liz thinks that the South Park movie was more artistically brilliant than Citizen Kane".... the thing is.... it's a balance. I went through my favourite movies and thought about which movies, for me, were the most enjoyable and at the same time had a quality that I feel has given them a special place in the film world. For instance I do not think that Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail is the all time greatest movie. I would probably have to go Casablance there :P But I like it the most. Big Fish is one that I put high on my list. Probably not history's GREATEST piece of film-making, but I think that there are 45 minutes in there that are pretty darn fantastic. And yes. Ewan is hot.

I'm posting this, and while I expect a tidal wave of "Are you serious?" I guess I'm over it, and it's time to stop justifying my picks. I'm no film buff, I just enjoy a well made, entertaining film. There are lots I wish I could stick on there that I couldn't, but I am proud that I managed to avoid doing something like sticking "A Clockwork Orange" or "Resevoire Dogs" on there "just because". I have always felt that it was important to maintain a level of snobbishness about movies. While I think it is important to stay open-minded enough about films to at least give them a try, I will never pretend to like something I can't stand. That, to me, is more pretentious than refusing to watch any more Michael Bay movies on moral grounds.

Scott Buchanan: Bachelor of Arts and Irish Tourist. Damn him!

The University of Windsor is located underneath of a bridge:



The most recent article to be published by internationally recognized faculty: "The Property of Billy Goats and How to Catch Them"

My brother, as always, is too cool for the family:



Fortunately we managed to loser it up, by throwing him a tiny fan in line and by Mom having a few too many celebratory drinks (seriously Mom, stick with that story)


After the long... long ceremony:






And finally, for those of you who are unaware of a serious epidemic involving hand-held communication devices, here is "Scott's Graduation Crackberry Edition":

Stolen from the Book of Face

Instructions:
"FACEBOOK (ahem Blogger) SCATTERGORIES.. it's harder than it looks!
Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...They MUST be real places, names, things...NOTHING made up! Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question."


Your Name: Liz

Famous Artist/Band/Musician: Leonardo DaVinci/Led Zeppelin/Lou Reed

4 letter word: Luck

Vehicle: Lexus

TV Show: Little House on the Prairie

City: Luxemburg

Boy Name: Liam

Girl Name: Leah

Alcoholic drink: Liquor

Occupation: Lawyer

Flower: Lupin

Something you wear: Lace

Something you do: Love

Something that you dislike: Lying

Celeb: Luke Wilson

Food: Lemon

Something found in a kitchen: Ladel

Reason for Being Late: Lost track of time

Cartoon Character: Lisa Simpson

Something you yell: Leave me alone!


**************************

Also I think that this would have made a nice addition to my last post... but here it is now anyway:

"A view from the desk of Dilbert creator Scott Adams"

Scott Adams is spying on me at work

Gee Ma I wanna go to Southern Ontario!

I am heading home tomorrow evening for a few days in the thriving metropolis of York Ontario (not to be confused with the region of York in Toronto which actually is a thriving metroplois). I will be visiting with family and friends and with ANY luck I will be attending my brother's graduation in Windsor. Also, I am auditioning for the Acting for Film and Television program at Humber. The very cool thing about this program: not only is it taught by some very sweet Second City and Toronto School of Film alumni and former staff, but it also gets me a credit towards ACTRA and gets my feet wet in Toronto in a slightly less frightening way than showing up in the city with no job and no money.

Which is of course plan C :)

On another, and equally important, note: Pirates of the Carribean: At World's End is, thus far, in the lead (as far as I'm concerned) for summer movies. I think that it may be time to put my I heart Captain Jack Sparrow button back on my purse.

Liz the Conservative

This is what makes me a lousy politician. I don't know whether I even agree with his politics, but I would vote for Bill Casey. He is in fact dissenting from the Conservatives for not being Conservative enough (as I gather).
On the surface, as a liberal, I probably ought to agree that Nova Scotia should share its wealth with the other Atlantic provinces in this instance- I guess- truthfully I don't understand the situation nearly enough to expand.

What I do understand is integrity: a rarity in politics, but a quality that I hold higher possibly even than the politician's beliefs themselves.
I feel that by defying his party and standing up for his province, whether right or wrong, Bill Casey showed integrity. And we all know what happens to those with integrity in Ottawa...

Conservative MP Bill Casey was booted out of the Tory caucus hours after he broke ranks with his party on Tuesday night and voted against a bill to implement the federal budget.

The Nova Scotia MP said he couldn't support the budget because it doesn't allow his province to fully benefit from offshore oil and gas revenues without losing equalization payments from the federal government.

When Casey rose to his feet to cast his "Nay" vote, cheers and shouts erupted in the House of Commons.

The budget implementation bill, which sets the Conservative's March 19 budget into action, still passed by a margin of 158-108. It was a preliminary vote, with a third and final reading of the bill expected later this week.

Bloc Québécois MPs and all Conservatives except Casey banded together to ensure the bill passed on Tuesday. The Liberals and the NDP voted against it.

Casey, a veteran backbencher, said the government had promised Nova Scotia and Newfoundland and Labrador that it wouldn't include offshore oil and gas revenues in its equalization formula.

"I believe that the government of Canada signed a contract with my province of Nova Scotia and it's not being honoured," Casey told CBC News earlier Tuesday in Ottawa.

"Whether it's by accident or not, the budget was amended, and that amendment was not agreed to by the provinces, who also signed it. So only one side of this agreement changed it and approved this amendment.

"I don't think that's right."

Casey wanted Flaherty to make changes to the budget before the third reading, but Flaherty rejected calls Tuesday in the House of Commons to do so.

The current budget offers the two provinces a choice between two options:

- A new, enriched equalization formula that includes a cap on the amount of offshore oil and gas revenues the provinces can keep.

- The old equalization formula, with the benefits from the Atlantic Accord on offshore oil and gas revenues that was negotiated by the former Liberal government in 2004.

Casey, who was first elected to Parliament as a Progressive Conservative, said the new budget could cost Nova Scotia up to $1 billion.

With files from the Canadian Press

Notes on failure

Some time ago I made a wonderful discovery. I auditioned for that show I was in last summer, A Comedy of Errors, and at first I thought that I hadn't been cast. When I first began to absorb the defeat I realized something. I was pretty OK with it. More so than I had been with any other show. Mostly because when I thought back to my previous failing (see all 800 posts about how I wanted to be Ophelia in Hamlet sept-nov 2005) and thought, well hey this isn't nearly as bad as that was. Probably no role will ever crush me like that. Not just because it was Ophelia, but a chance to play it in my final year of university in a show with my close friends. It sucked a lot. I worked very hard and I didn't get it. But I made the most of it and moved on with life. Most importantly I know now that I can audition for anything and nothing will ever hurt like that again, so I will always be able to take the high road and move on.

So that is how I shall regard my latest sour news. I did not get in to York Univeristy's MFA program. This was also largely based on an audition as well as several letters of intent and recommendation, a CV, transcripts and a whole lot of work that is feeling slightly in vain now. I spent a lot of time and money and energy on that school and I have to admit, despite my best attempts to remain level headed, I really wanted to get in. It has been a tough pill to swallow, but it was the school that I wanted the absolute most. There are going to be a lot of no's in the world of acting for me, so it is good to have hit a big ass one right now. The program may have been very cool but there is nothing stopping me from reading plays and learning more about acting on my own.
The important thing now is to move on, so that the next time I am applying to school or for an actor training program I will have this experience to teach me that I am capable of carrying on.

Theatre and acting have probably had the ability, even more than love, to make me my happiest and most destroyed. My happiest moment in all of high school was having the play that my friends and I wrote win at the Sears Drama Festival while we all won awards for acting and writing. Being a theatre student at Laurentian was probably the greatest time in my life so far. I will never forget the first time I really felt "it" on stage, or rehearsing Taming of the Shrew with Josh, or watching Brie's face as she walked off stage after her monologue for the Vagina Monologues, the standing ovation we got at the end of Isobel, or the overwhelming response Andrew's performance earned in Hamlet, or doing my scene with Frank in Aminta . These are some of the greatest memories I have and it is in these moments that I know I'm alive and none of the other crap in all the world really matters. I'm there on stage or back stage or just in that damn theatre with all my energy and heart poured into every minute and something wonderful happens.

I guess I can't really describe it.

"I found a whole bunch of friends with the same dream, and that makes us kind of like a family..."


So that's where it's at. Life feels pretty miserable right now, but that's only because I love theatre so much and it has made me feel so wonderful. It might not always make me happy, and I don't know if it's the ONLY thing I can ever do. But people who say "the only way you'll ever be an actor is if it's the only thing you can ever see yourself doing" are idiots. If you can't see yourself being anything other than an actor how the hell are you supposed to be a fire fighter or a CEO or a teacher or any of the other thousands of roles you will have to be in a play. If I'm going to get good at this art what I have to do is keeping on living like an artist.
Even if it hurts.

Well I'll let Butters tell you the rest:




GOTH KID: Well I guess you can join up with us-
GOTH KID #2: Yeah, we're gonna go to the grave yard and write poems about how pointless life is.
BUTTERS: Uh, no thanks, I love life.
STAN: Huh? But you just got dumped!
BUTTERS: Well yeah and I'm sad, but at the same time I'm really happy that something could make me feel that sad. It's like it makes me feel alive, you know? It makes me feel human. The only way I could feel this sad now is if I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good, so I guess what I'm feeling is a beautiful sadness. I guess that sounds stupid.
GOTH KID #2: Yeah.
STAN: No Butters, that doesn't sound stupid at all.
BUTTERS: But thanks for offering to let me be in your clique. But to be honest, I'd rather be a crying little pussy than a $#%&$@ goth kid.

What would the movie of your life be called?

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Working title: Lord of the Bongs- The Fellow-ness of the Liz

Perfect timing

Blog Therapy II

I have trusted a known compulsive liar with information closest to my heart, yet I cannot trust my friends, family or significant others when they say that they love me.

I don't fear abandonment. I assume it.

I have been meaning to do this for a long time. And some one else needs to hear this to help make it real.

C J: You taught me what it is to have a broken heart. You still have not apologized. You were my best friend for the toughest years of school, through awkward tween-dom into adolesence. You were the first friend that I felt I could talk to about anything and not be judged. I thought that you might be one of the only people who had ever really understood me. You took me out on my first date. When you moved away from Cayuga you promised that we would always stay friends, and even wrote "To Liz, my bestest friend for ever, love Chris" on a picture that I still have.

You made a promise that you could not keep.

I guess that's what I've always believed: that no one can really keep that promise. And so I have never trusted anyone to love me that does not constantly reaffirm it. It has screwed with my relationships and friendships for WAY too long. It ends now. You were an asshole. You lied. But, even though you've never asked for it: I forgive you. Because I'm over it.

Free Speech*

Thank goodness there's no censorship on the internet.



*Some conditions may apply, see in store for details. Offer not valid in France, Germany, China, the United States, the United Kingdom and the Islamic world. Employees, News Reporters or Activists from Anti-Religious/Governmental biased organizations may not apply. All applicatnts must answer skill testing question: "What is the square root of 6,784,942,115?".

Why do I Still Get a Daily Horoscope?

From the people that brought you "anything planted in the ground will be certain to grow today" in February:


Aries
March 20 - April 18
Your heart is going pitter-patter, dear Aries, and you are tempted to escape into a romantic fantasyland in which you play the starring role. The bad news is that something may be trying to hold you back. It could be that evil is coming on the scene and reminding you that work needs to be done here on Earth before you can go off into your own little fairy-tale world.

... what?

Lyrics of the Night

BARBER:
I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.
I sleep all night and I work all day.
MOUNTIES:
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I eat my lunch.
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He eats his lunch.
He goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shoppin'
And has buttered scones for tea.
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I skip and jump.
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He skips and jumps.
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around in bars?!
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I wear high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie,
Just like my dear Papa.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He wears high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra?!
[talking]
What's this? Wants to be a girlie?! Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!
[singing]
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
He's a lumberjack, and he's okaaaaay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.