Maybe I would steal purse!

Who are you to judge me, Mr. Don't-Steal-Movies ad?!

The point is, after giving the Cineplex corporation $50 of my hard earned money this summer SO FAR (remember I still have Get Smart, The Dark Knight and Hamlet 2* to go) I'm getting really sick of seeing that lame don't-steal-movies ad. At least they were all pretty good. Indiana Jones wasn't exactly amazing, but it was a lot of fun and I was pleasantly surprised with Iron Man... the only one I was really dissappointed with was Prince Caspian, and because there's nothing I like more than being vindicated, here's a review by two guys who felt the same way:


I was however, far more impressed with Kung Fu Panda. I have ranted at length about children's entertainment "these days" but this movie had a couple of elements that I enjoyed. The humor, while occasionally over-the-top or "man getting hit with football" based was not the central focus of the film, there was actually, dear god, a story. And no it was not an original story, in fact it pretty much came out and made fun of how Star Warsy it was, but at least in a nice subtle way. It was about being an outcast, about believing in yourself and aspiring to greatness. In that way it was cut from the same cloth as the Disney golden age of the 90s. In fact if Dreamworks can start making things other than Shrek they may be poised to pick up the Disney torch... especially if WallE doesn't live up to its hype. Though Disney would have a hard time doing worse than Chicken Little. By the way, don't ever watch an animated movie based purely on liking the voice actors involved. You'd think I'd have learned my lesson from Doogal. You'd THINK.

Anyways, I watched the movie with a five year old who laughed and got scared during the fight scenes and then wanted to watch it again. So not only am I not alone in my appreciation of the movie, but it also proves my long standing belief that it's good to frighten children in movies. That's what makes them fun.
When I was a youngling I had to leave Peter Pan in the theatre because I got scared in the part where Captain Hook was sneaking up on him in the cave. I also may have had a series of nightmares. It also became one of my favourite movies as a kid and I went as Tiger Lily for Halloween the next year (Incidently, denying I was ever frightened, citing temporary illness as the reason for leaving the theatre).
I'm not suggesting that all kindergarteners should watch Dark Crystal, but maybe it's not SUCH a bad thing if kids get a little scared when they see movies. That's what makes them fun!

I'm recommending Kung Fu Panda for kids 4-104 and giving it my personal Liz thumbs up.









*PS: For those of you that have not yet heard of Hamlet 2 and are asking the obvious question I direct you to 1:03 :

Wonder-Twin Powers Activate!

Form of a gopher!
Form of a mote!

Inspired by last Tuesday's Colbert Report. I suggest watching the entire episode. I TVOed it and made every member of my family watch it at least once with me.

Viva la Musique!

I'm in the midst of doing some iTunes downloading. Today 3 albums (though sigh, I only anticipated wanting two) came out today. I am currently downloading my most recent unhealthy preoccupation The Hold Steady. I haven't heard anything off of the new album yet, but I don't care. Boys and Girls in America was sweet, and I haven't been able to get "Stuck Between Stations" out of my head for months. Wolf Parade was kind enough to stream their new album on their MySpace page so I've had a chance to listen to a few songs. It's definitely a little different than I thought it would be (I was sure recording in that church was going to actually turn them into the Arcade Fire), but I like a few of the songs. Nothing is totally grabbing me like "I'll Believe in Anything" or "Sons and Daughters of Hungry Ghosts", but quite frankly 2 albums in a row with songs that awesome would be an act of the music gods.

Finally, I am doing a surprise download. Prior to last week I did not think I would be buying Coldplay's new album. I loved Parachutes, but I wasn't keen on Rush of Blood to the Head (loved the "The Scientist" mind you, but wasn't as impressed with "Clocks" as everyone else seemed to be), then after I heard "Speed of Sound" I wondered if I would ever feel the desire to own another Coldplay album.

I had heard "Violet Hill" on the radio and thought, 'Hey that's a nice contrast to what they have been doing, I'll see if anything's up on iTunes yet.'
So I downloaded that and "Viva La Vida". I stuck "Viva La Vida" on a playlist with some stuff from Flight of the Conchords and Colin Hay that I hadn't heard yet and went to the gym. I actually had to stop in the middle of my reps to find out whose song was so great. I was pleasantly finding myself thinking "I must get that album" for the first time since hearing "Yellow" at junior prom.
At any rate, the tracks have finished downloading while I've been writing this. I'm off to the gym with a fully loaded iPod and a newly rekindled love for popular music.

The 401

Hey, I hit 400 posts without particularly realizing it. Sweet.

I like to think that in those 400 posts there was some wit and wisdom. Whether it was my delusions of being married to Ewan McGregor, my list of things that I would buy with a $10 Million movie contract, the pun-rific Star Wars/"I've been drinking and here's what I think" saga, titling and subsequently retitling several posts "Everything's coming up Milhouse!", the idea that I stole from Andrew about just posting song lyrics that were stuck in my head everytime I was stuck for something to say, or just my random thoughts on everything from leg waxing to Cameron Diaz, I hope that you've all been enjoying these 3 years of web logging.

Here's a story.

My parents were in Ottawa this week, and my Dad brought back two pens and gave one to me. I was sitting in his chair tonight and playing with HIS pen (as most of you know I'm a terrible fidgeter). Anyways, I pulled the lid off of the pen and with it came the part that holds the ink in place. It didn't get on me, but the pen was now broken, and took some tricky handy work to get back together while my brother sat and gave me a "good job" sort of look. I finally got it back together, looked up at Scott and said "He'll never notice" and set it back on the table next to Dad's chair.

Five minutes ago, as I was writing the first half of this post, when from downstairs I heard my father say:

"Scott, I have your present from Ottawa, it's a pen!"

Our Endless Numbered Days

1:55AM Thought: Maybe flying off the handle about an irresponsible guidance counellor in the states is not the best way to deal with seriously repressed emotional issues that have been brought dangerously close to the surface of late.

Then again neither is vague blogging.

still

Will you say to me when I’m gone
Your face has faded but lingers on
Because light strikes a deal with each coming night
Oh oh oh oh
Coming night
Oh oh oh oh
Coming night.

Lies and the Lying Liars that tell them

I saw a story on Yahoo News that was just about the only thing that could me me go pundit on this thing. Being Yahoo, I can't actually post the video, so you'll have to go here to watch it.


It says that the parents and teens are angry. The ones on that video aren't anywhere near angry enough. If they had done that at my high school, we would have opened the biggest can of whoop-ass on our teachers and guidance counsellors. Never mind that they did it at all, but they let it go on for TWO HOURS?! That's unbelievably cruel.

It reminds me of the South Park episode "My Future Self and Me", where the kids' parents will go to any length to scare them into not doing drugs, instead of just being honest with them (a commentary on the Bush administration's attempt to link pot to 9/11... I mean seriously WTF?)

Stan basically says that if they had just told him the truth about drugs it would have a greater impact that an elaborate scheme of lies. When kids and teens feel like they've been lied to by authority figures they're more inclined to rebel. As much as I love rebellion, I prefer the kind where you wear short skirts or tell off your teacher when they're being a jerk- not the kind where you get behind the wheel after a few.

The truth will out. I'm a big fan of honesty, it's no secret. Maybe it's because, when people lie about stuff, particularly under the guise of "it's for your own good" it usually isn't.
The more you lie to scare people under the pretense that they can't make wise decisions for themselves, the harder they'll come back at you when they find out you were lying. Don't believe me? Ask the Bush administration.

The Last Temptation of Liz

Probably not for the guys who read this. That's right there are girls who read my blog.

As a follow up to my last post: I have a giant crush on Willem Dafoe.

I am so totally attracted to his acting.

The thing about Dafoe is that while he's often a little over the top (read a lot) he's so goddamn committed to it that I don't even care. So unlike most women who watch Platoon amd think Johnny Depp is hot, I have eyes only for Willem- Seriously, who names their son that? (Also sign #35 that I've lost touch with reality: yelling at Tom Beranger to "stop being such a dick").

Everytime I go into one of my day-dreamy moments about Willem Dafoe, my brother is always here to remind me of the quote from Riff Trax about the Spiderman movie:

"But being a spider naturally puts him on the bad side of Norman Osborn, the charismatic head of OsCorp Industries who manages to find enough time in his day to moonlight as an evil goblin (played by real life evil goblin Willem Dafoe.)"

Which of course brings me to my all time favourite ACTING! moment:

"Where did you say you got that cut?"

Is it over the top? Yes. Do I LOVE it? Yes.







Now I know what you're thinking- Liz, do you have crushes on other actors based purely on talent? Why yes, and thank you for asking.
We've already dealt with my disturbing response to Ralph Fiennes in Schindler's List, but did you know that I also inexplicably find James Woods really hot? I even watched an entire episode of Shark! There's no reason to do that.
Of course my most recent acting-crush is on Scrubs (and Platoon) co-star John C McGinley. I've had to go back to several scenes on my Scrubs Season 1 DVD and re-watch his acting. That one where Dr. Cox takes his shirt off, that one where he drops his pants, that other one where he takes his shirt off, the point is his acting is shirtless... flawless-body... damnit! These guys are all like twice my age- maybe I just need to go back to being attracted to guys with Scottish accents or Jewish comedians.

Quality vs Quality

Last night I finally watched Platoon. Sorry Joe, I was wrong, that was probably one of the best movies I've ever seen.

Which got me thinking... while, in my opinion, it may in fact be one of the best made films in history I have no intention of owning it, or adding it to any favourite movies list. It's not exactly the kind of movie I would watch again and again for enjoyment.

While I will stand fast for the excellence of many of my top 10 Favourites (City Lights, Dr Strangelove, Casablanca), I admit that they are not always the highest quality movies in history (Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail is my #1 after all). I do like to actually ENJOY the movies I'm watching, and I actually get kind of pissed when I'm told that I should love a movie that was absolutely painful to watch for no good reason.
But every once in a while, and frequently with many of the folks reading this, I watch a movie that is kind of painful, in that it is disturbing, but is also incredibly moving and impressive. I have decided to pay tribute to these films in my:

Top 10 Movies I Thought Were Brilliant, but I Never Want to Have to See Again

10. Titus

9. Full Metal Jacket

8. One Flew Over the Cookoo's Nest

7. Resevoir Dogs (Oh yes, I went there)

6. The English Patient

5. Saving Private Ryan

4. Natural Born Killers

3. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (With the exception of the scene where all the guys try to ambush him and the music goes 'wah nah nah nah nah- duh duh duh duh- wah nah nah nah nah- duh duh duh duh'. I could watch that forever)

2. Schindler's List

1. Platoon


I actually had an entire post written with explanations about why I thought the movies were excellent, and what had disturbed me so terribly about them, but it was starting to sound like a psychotherapy session. Also, I assume that since I am dealing with a few people's favourites that I'll have to argue this in some sort of angry flame war anyways, so it's really just a time saving activity.

Smell-o-vision

This is really one of the strangest things I've had happen in a while.

I noticed Monday whilst out to see Indiana Jones, with the lovely Miss Liz VanTassel, that something on me smelled kind of funny. Not really bad (I hope Liv!), but noticably strange. The smell got stronger and by the evening I was convinced that I had spilled something really stinky on myself. I woke up the next morning, had a shower and put on copious amounts of deoderant. At exactly this point, I noticed the smell again. I smelled my deoderant. My BRAND NEW stick of deoderant, which I had purchased Sunday night smelt like cheese that had gone very very bad.

I have seriously never heard of this. I don't think deoderant goes bad...

Any ways, this is not only a public service announcement of apology to Liv, but seriously- what the hell? I should call Secret...

Also, I think it's really a shame that the blogosphere has yet to develope an HTML code to post smells- although, I suspect no one would ever read my blog again.



PS: I am not entirely convinced that the new Indiana Jones movie wasn't written exactly the same way that Snakes on a Plane was written.
ie:
Blogger: Dude, you know what would be SO COOL...
Lucas-Spielberg (reading): Gold!

Did I still love it? Yes.
Do I think it was better than Temple of Doom? Phantom Menace was better than Temple of Doom.
Would I go see it again? Hell yes.

PS

As a follow up to my last post:

Is anyone else interested in changing the English language to include a single hyphonated "that-that" whenever you need to use the word "that" twice in a row? It's kind of how you say it, and MS Word always gets angry at me for repeating the same word twice.

Also, I have located my saltine. It's at Future Shop and contains special commentary on the episode "My Musical". Mmmmm Scrubs...

Clone Scrubs

Sign #27 Liz has lost all touch with reality: She's decided that Scrubs is actually just all of the characters from Clone High grown up and working in a Hospital.























































(Don't agree? Count how many times Elliot says "Come on you guys" in that nagging voice)



















(OK, that one was kind of cheating...)


















Oh Bill Lawrence... it's like your only desire in life is to appeal to exactly my sense of humour (and have some bizarre portal into my head to determine exactly what I think its funny, even if it completely perplexes or even frightens other people)

Why is it that that isn't the first time I've had that very strange thought?

Also... I wonder where I left my saltine cracker...?

The Sound of Settling

I was listening to the 102.1 The Edge a couple of days ago and I heard the new Death Cab for Cutie single. I can't really say that it made me want the CD. I thought it was boring and lacked the simplicity and creative lyrics of their earlier work, and made me wonder why we didn't see a Postal Service CD instead.

I havne't listened to the rest of the CD though... does anyone have it, and have a better impression of it?

Training Day

I went for some staff training two days ago (and for fans of the UK Office- yes we did do role playing involving listening skills, and no I did not "get their attention" despite the urge). I had to kill some time after arriving on GO Transit, because as usual with public transit I had the choice of being 1 hour early or 5 minutes late. I went into the nearby South Common "Mall". The term is clearly being used loosely. I noticed what ended up being only the second strangest sign in the mall:


"Arian Shoes"


Now I do realize that this is probably someone's name and that even if it were spelt "Aryan" it wouldn't necissarily have the negative connotations that I was taking it to have- still it seemed like a strange choice for a name.

The sign that I felt eclipsed "Arian Shoes" was in the Dollar Mart:


"Yes, we sell British Products"


With a picture of the British flag. Actually, I was just interested in whether or not you sold pens- but yes British pens will be satisfactory...



I should probably get some sleep.

Sign #47 that I have Totally Lost Touch with Reality

I want to give Wilson a hug.





Stay tuned for the full "Signs 1-50 Liz has lost touch with reality". Only about six of them involve House. Most of them are about my insistence that I can use The Force or my ability to solve crimes to the tune of The Who.

My Problem with Narnia

The Chronicles of Narnia. hmmmm

I quite liked the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, but I'm not sure I like the series as a whole. I went to see the movie Prince Caspian and I think I've figured out my problem with Narnia.

While the religious symbolism in Narnia is about as subtle as a blunt axe, it didn't bother me so much in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. It's not that Christianity bothers me per se- it's CS Lewis's view of it.

What begins to happen in Prince Caspian, and essentially the rest of the saga is that Aslan=God begins to promote an ideaology that I do not feel is consistent with either the bible or of my experience with Christiantiy, but rather the elements of fundamentalist Christianity which I am most uncomfortable with. Chiefly that the best kind of faith is blind faith. Lucy can see Aslan because she believes in him unconditionally, where as the other children question his presence- not his existence, but his presence. They don't understand how he could allow bad things to happen in Narnia, and wonder where he is. This is basically held up as the wrong way of viewing things. Lucy, who does not question Aslan is exalted and basically made out to be the great hero.
If Aslan=God then what follows is, "Believe in God and don't question His divine wisdom or presence". Thinking "How could god allow suffering in the world?" is bad, because God has a plan, and if you just have faith in him everything will turn out fine. This is essentially what I got from Prince Caspian (That and the fact that it is apparently necissary to cram a love story into every movie with an actress over the age of 14).

The idea that blind faith is the best kind of faith isn't consistent with the bible. It's not even consistent with Jesus. The mythology of Narnia becomes increasingly wrapped up in religious symbolism as the stories go on, and the more it becomes overtly 'Aslan is God', 'Narnia is the kingdom of Heaven' and so forth, the harder it is to ignore the moral preaching of the stories. Again I have no problems with Christian morality- I really dig love thy neighbor as thy self- but no matter what spiritual force you understand to be at work, or what value system you adhere to it should never be a simple question of believing or not believing. I can think of few things worse than blind faith in anything. This is why I seem to keep falling into the "agnostic" category in many people's views (despite the fact that that I do think that there's a higher power and believe very strongly in many elements of Christianity, Buddism, Islam, Judaism and others). I simply cannot justify blind faith logically or theologically.


Part II: My Bias

I like the character Susan the best of all of the Narnia kids. This will shock no one that knows me. Susan, Lisa Simpson, Kyle Broflaski, Hermione Granger... who ever that nagging voice of reason is, I am always drawn to. It's not that I value intelligence above all else, I'm a big fan of bravery, honesty and kindness ahead of reason- but the sensible/intelligent/nagging characters are also the ones who challenge authority, question why things are the way they are and stand up against injustice. Sometimes they take it over board or can be self-righteous, but that voice of reason is also the voice of change and sometimes greatly needed truth. Susan has that potential, but in the world of Narnia her voice of reason and truth is painted as a negative. That she questions Aslan, that she questions whether or not the children should proceed into Narnia or fight in the great battle are seen as weaknesses. In another story she might be a hero, but in Narnia she is, at best, a foil for Lucy.

For anyone who hasn't read the complete Chronicles I won't give away Susan's fate, but you've most likely gathered from this that I'm not impressed.
Lucy is great, fine. She is kind and innocent and very brave, but in another story Susan would be her great ally, not her foil. Because let's face it, without the nagging voice of reason Harry would still be wandering around the forest with Ron looking for Horocruxes, Bart would have been done in by Side Show Bob, and Stan and Kenny would have been thrown in a giant pit of lava at the Airport Hilton ("Everything OK? Got enough Buffet items? Do you have enough lava?").



Oh right the film...

Ummmmm why did Susan and Caspian have a random love story? What the hell was that song at the end? And please cut it out with all the shots of the Pevensie children staring at each other meaningfully as if thinking something very deep in the middle of every battle scene for no apparent reason.

"Uh, Liz it is just a kids film... maybe you could take it a little easy?"

No. Because I think that complacency with children's entertainment is what led to Pokeman and Air Bud. Just because something is for kids doesn't mean it can suck. Jim Henson didn't think kids stuff should suck and neither do I. So there.

Tim Horton's on the Defence

I did not read one article that thought of that pun.

You don't even get it do you?

Sigh...here.


Employee fired over free Timbit getting job back

London, Ont. woman will be getting her job at Tim Hortons back after being fired for giving a free Timbit to a toddler.

A statement issued by the company's head office Thursday said the person who fired Nicole Lilliman, 27, went too far and that the single mother of four has been reinstated.

"Unfortunately the action of the manager of this location was not appropriate," the statement read. "With an apology from management Ms. Lilliman has been rehired by the franchisee. We sincerely apologize to our customers for this unfortunate incident."

Tim Hortons customers interviewed in London were less than impressed upon hearing of the firing.

"They're not going to go broke giving a child a Timbit," one woman told A-Channel London. "Shame on them."

Timbits are small balls of glazed dough that sell for $0.16.

Lilliman has said she didn't think much about giving the Timbit to the 11-month-old child, who came in with a regular customer on Monday. She said staff members often give Timbits to pets and children and that she was trying to calm the child.

Lilliman had worked at the store for about three years. She said was greeted by three managers when she arrived at work on Wednesday, who confronted her about the free gift after watching surveillance footage taken in the restaurant.

Uncomfortable with returning to the store from which she was fired, Lilliman will now work at another Tim Hortons location just down the street, company spokesperson Rachel Douglas told the Canadian Press on Thursday.

No decision has been made on whether action will be taken against the manager who fired Lilliman, said Douglas, adding she does not believe the manager's actions are ground for dismissal.

Sequel?

Farce book

I always knew that was a really brilliant joke.

"Good. Do you have magical powers?"

So every once in a while a movie totally passes under my radar and I can't even blame anyone else for saying "Nah, I don't really want to see that". It just seems that I totally missed the boat on this movie and my life has been the poorer for it, until now:





This is a top 10er. I don't really know which spot, or which movie I'm dethroning, but I know it's there.

A few things:

1) Will Farrel can act? I mean apart from shouting who he is prior to delivering every line ("I'm John Rocker!") or doing an alteration of his President Bush impersonation. I completely forgot it was Will Farrel within minutes. Not only did his performance have layers and subtlety it had humour that wasn't over-stated or ridiculous. It was honest and very touching.

2) I am in love with Emma Thompson




















"Liz, please stop calling me"


3) I've been trying to think of a way to describe this film: It's like the love child of Adaptation and Hamlet.

"Hamlet: Oh that this too, too solid flesh would melt, thaw, and resolve itself into a dew...
McKee: ...and God help you if you use soliloquy in your work, my friends. God help you. That's flaccid, sloppy writing. Any idiot can write a soliloquy to explain the thoughts of a character."

Ok, maybe that's not right.









In case you haven't guessed, I highly recommend this film. If you've seen it, and disagree with my proclaiming it wonderful, I invite you to bite me. Just kidding. Write me a comment. But I'll probably just tell you to bite me.

Beat these pictures, Burj Dubai!

Yesterday I went to Toronto for a shoot for a Sony commercial. It was not a lot of fun, but I did get a chance to snap two nerdily patriotic photos:








***********

I was also in Port Dover the other day with Emily, and captured the following lovely picture:

Ring Ring Ring Banana King

I don't think there's any explanation necissary.




OK maybe there is. But I can't for the life of me imagine what that would be.


Although Transbuddha got it pretty close:

"Imagine if you will that Aqua Teen Hunger Force’s Carl was shoved into a Unicorn body and then pestered by a similarly unicorn’d Walter and Perry from Home Movies, and then hammer it down with a PCP laced mallet.

Yah, that still doesn’t explain it."

Workin' Overtime

Sorry for the long wait.

I've been very busy with work and other work related things of late. I have good news. I will be going full time at ErinOak Kids in June, and until then there is no shift shortage to be certain. I still can't believe my luck, because I am the official bottom of the totem pole at work until they hire somebody new, so this was quite unexpected.

The other little bit of fun of late is my Birthday present.




Yoda enjoys Feist and my Lollapalooza '06 playlist, but thinks that it's cruel the way Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant pick on 'that poor bald man' in their podcast.

Canada on Strike

No not for more internet money. For more internet.

I am getting really sick of being blocked out of videos. And internet radio. But more so internet videos. I'm not even allowed to go to Comedycentral.com, because I might accidently view the Daily Show for free. Because I totally can't do that otherwise on CTV. Now I have to go to the crappy Comedy Network site, which will let me "watch full episodes", if I don't mind getting cut off every 10 seconds for them to buffer. I also deeply miss Pandora Internet radio, which is apparently banned in Canada. I can only assume that this is because it's a bad thing for me to get introduced to bands like Broken Social Scene.

I would complain, but seriously... on whose authority were these bans put in place? Nobody owns the internet. Well, except Google. It's probably Google's fault.

I suppose if I can't get more internet, I'll settle for a gift certificates to Bennigans.

• MTV
• Music Videos
• MTV Shows
• Entertainment News

Fate

Did you know that MY favourite flowers are daffodils, and that the Canadian Cancer Society runs their Daffodil campaign at the end of March, corrisponding with both mine and Ewan McGregor's birthday? :D

It's meant to be.

Ten Minutes for Unsportsmanlike Conduct

Say what you want about the Toronto Maple Leafs.


At least they haven't

been arrested for stealing purses

got a team so childish they fight each other during practice

and ummm... holy crap


I mean seriously. What the hell happened to my sport?

Faerie Lights

I made this video about two weeks ago. It's not edited nor does it have any visual effects.

Do you know what it is?


****************

Also on the subject of YouTube- they are now having their own video awards. Most of the categories are actually a little ridiculous, but the Comedy Video category had a tough competetion going. I would have given it to PowerThirst 2:Redomination hands down, but the first PowerThirst got the nomination, and I don't think it's as good. Super Mario:Game Over is actually pretty impressive, and the Potter Puppet Pals: The Mysterious Ticking Noise has to be in a category all its own for "most painfully addictive comedy song since Banana Phone". "Shoes" of course actually premiered in 2006, but its sequel "Let me Borrow that Top" is also nominated and is pretty excellent.

I have decided to present my own awards honouring 2007's top youtube and other online movies.

Presenting The Liz Spends Too Much Time Online Awards:


Best Screenplay: "Facebook"-Berats and Bereta

Best Adapted Screenplay: "Titanic (30 second Bunny Theatre)"- Angry Alien Productions

Best Direction: "Super Mario: Game Over"-Ryan Hunter

Best Animated Short: "Intermission (The Animation Show)"-Don Hertzfeldt

Best Animated Feature Length: "Strongbad Email #167: The Movies"- Homestarruner.com

Best Short Film: "Dramatic Chipmunk" (ok, just kidding)

Best Original Song: "Mysterious Ticking Noise"-Neil Cicierega (Potter Puppet Pals)

Best Actress: Kelly (also known as Liam Sullivan) in "Let me Borrow that Top"

Best Actor: Luke Berats in "To-Do List" (Joe will have his turn)

Best Movie: PowerThirst 2:Redomination



*****************

Update: The Mysterious Ticking Noise won for best Comedy Video, which is sort of ridiculous in and of itself, but totally appropriate for YouTube.

Also, the glowing light in my video is my Mom's colour changing pathway light under three feet of snow.

"At 11am Eastern Standard time, live on CNN, Barack Obama spoke to Americans about racism, like adults"- Jon Stewart

This is long, but worth it:



You'll want to be able to say to your kids some day, "Yeah I watched Obama's speech in Philly". Then they'll make fun of you. Trust me*.


*Disclaimer: If you are not already aware, my Mother owns an album of John Kennedy's speeches, for which she is harassed endlessly by my brother and I.

Home Alone

If ever there was grounds for legally divorcing my parents based on emotional distress, this is it:





How sharper than a serpents tooth is it to have parents that don't take you with them to England.

I am positive that's how that quote goes.

Wow.

My face, while watching tonight's Season 12 premier of South Park :






"I'd hate to meet the sick bastard that came up with those things"- Army General, with reference to the the Woodland Critters in Imaginationland.

Why God is like a University Student

Liz says:
What's up? Procrastinating?
Emily says:
god
Liz says:
I think god was a procrastinator too.
Emily says:
oh??
Liz says:
Think about it. On the first day he created the heaven and the earth. Ok that was like opening a new file on word and calling it "Earth: My Essay" and buying some new printer paper
Emily says:
baahahahahahahahahahahaha
Liz says:
Then he created water. That was like, he was sitting at the key board and thought "Hm, I'm thirsty"
Liz says:
It wasn't until the third day that he created dry land. Which is sort of like him thinking "OK, I've got to write something" and just doing a sort of random expose
Emily says:
thats fabulous
Liz says:
At any rate... God dicked around for 4 days before he got anything finished. Day four he's still sitting staring at the computer and then thinks: There isn't enough light in this room. That's the problem. I keep dosing off. So then God made two great lights: the greater to rule the day and the lesser to rule the night.
Liz says:
Finally on the fifth day "God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven." Translation: God got hammered and made up a bunch of crazy shit.
Emily says:
awesome
Liz says:
Finally on the sixth day God thinks "Huh, guess I'd better hunker down and get some work done- it's due tomorrow and I want to go on reading break". And so God made us in his own image. So really it was kind of like cutting and pasting, but changing enough words so that it's not really plagiarized .
Liz says:
And God saw every thing that he had made (self-editing), and, behold, it was very good (settled for about a B+).
Liz says:
The important part is, that then he rested, handed it in and went back to Nintendo Wii.

Snowing? In Canada?

The Greater Toronto Area is- wait for it- out of salt for the roads.





March 8, 2008, the city Liz works in:











*smacks foreheard*

Don't even kid yourself. They all sound like that.

I have a new favourite song. I think it's pretty much official. I'm completely obsessed with The Trapeze Swinger by Iron and Wine.


But please, remember me
Fondly
I heard from someone you're still pretty
And then
They went on to say
That the pearly gates
Had some eloquent graffiti
Like "We'll meet again"
And "Fuck the man"
And "Tell my mother not to worry"
And angels with their gray
Handshakes
Were always done in such a hurry


If anyone (Andrew/Joe) knows the proper tabs for this song, I am having trouble finding a good site online.

Also another newby to the "favourites" category is Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austin. It was difficult to get into for the first two chapters, but then I totally fell in love with it.

I love being able to identify with a particular character, and all the better if I identify with several. In this case the two daughters were like two different and very strong parts of my personality, and I was overwhelmed by the insight and wit with which their behaviour and mindset is portrayed.

I admire Elinor's stoicisism (not generally one of my qualities, but I related instantly to her rationalizing away everything and over analyzation of every situation), and I loved Marianne's passion and saw instantly that for all of her flaws she was incredibly honest and loyal.

I plan on watching the movie ASAP. I adore 3 of its main actors, I think it's remarkable that I managed to hold out until the end of the book without seeing it.

Leap of Faith

Only thing to do is jump over the moon!







Sorry this was a little late, I needed my computer cables.
This is of course my best attempt at capturing the lunar eclipse last week.

Ah, English class!

I saw this book advertised and it gave me a really good laugh. It also made me think of University.






How to Talk About Books You Haven’t Read

by Pierre Bayard

Have you read Shakespeare? Proust? War and Peace? Moby Dick? Middlemarch? Ulysses?

(Has anyone actually read Ulysses?)

Let’s face it, you can’t read everything. You probably don’t want to read everything.

So what are we supposed to do when the polite conversation turns to a classic book, or the latest Atwood, Ondaatje or Vassanji we haven’t actually read?

Fear not! Professor Pierre Bayard is at hand to save us from literary humiliation and social ostracism with his book, How To Talk About Books You Haven’t Read.

“It’s totally possible”, he assures us, “to carry on an engaging conversation about a book you haven’t read — including, and perhaps especially, with someone else who hasn’t read it either.”

In fact, “it is sometimes easier to do justice to a book if you haven’t read it in its entirety — or even opened it.”

With examples from Oscar Wilde, Graham Greene, Montaigne, Umberto Eco, Marcel Proust, and even the movie Groundhog Day, How To Talk About Books You Haven’t Read steers us through the social minefield of literary conversation (what exactly is the proper course of action when you meet an author whose book you haven’t read?), and offers advice to turn sticky social situations into opportunities for creative brilliance.

Charming, erudite, and mercifully irreverent, How to Talk About Books You Haven’t Read is a must-have for anyone with reader guilt (or a dinner party to attend).

I love Jon Stewart

Top 5 favourite Jon Stewart moments of the night:

#5- “Democrats do have an historic race going, Hillary Clinton vs. Barack Obama. Normally when you see a black man or a woman president, an asteroid is about to hit the Statue of Liberty.”

#4- "In case you're wondering what we all do here during the commercial breaks, mostly we just sit around making catty remarks about the outfits you're all wearing at home"

#3- "I happen to have taken Spanish in high school. I believe he told his mother where the library is."

#2- (with regards to Barack Hussein Obama's unfortunate name) "It's not easy to overcome. I think we all remember the ill-fated 1944 presidential campaign of Gaydolf Titler."

#1- Getting Markéta Irglová back up on stage to do her acceptance speech after she was unceremoniously cut off. Totally classy, and she gave the best speech of the night.

"You know, it's not so hard being a film cricket"

Just a quick note. I did not do a "should win"/"will win" kind of thing. I mostly discussed this in my blurb of each section. I have also only commented on categories in which I have seen at least 60% of the films in question (with one exception).
* denotes the movies I have not seen.

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for: MY OPINION!



Best Actor in a Supporting Role


*Casey Affleck, The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men

*Philip Seymour Hoffman, Charlie Wilson's War

Hal Holbrook, Into the Wild

Tom Wilkinson, Michael Clayton


This is not my being anti-no country, this is sctrictly routing for a deserving under-dog. Bardmen was convincing enough that when I see him at awards shows on TV I want to shout to the actors around him "Get away from him, he's a maniac!" (on the flip-side I hope that Ben Mulroney and Ryan Seacrest will ultimately sheild the stars from the attack). Anyways, Tom Wilkenson rocked my world.


Best Actress in a Supporting Role


Cate Blanchett, I'm Not There.

*Ruby Dee, American Gangster

Saoirse Ronan, Atonement

*Amy Ryan, Gone Baby Gone

Tilda Swinton, Michael Clayton


I'm rather partial to Cate Blanchett, it can't be helped. I am also partial to taking risks in acting and this has got to be one of the big ones. Though I suspect her big competition is Ruby Dee and I have yet to see American Gangster, so I will reserve judgement if Cate is not victorious.



Best Actress in a Leading Role


Cate Blanchett, Elizabeth: The Golden Age

Julie Christie, Away From Her

*Marion Cotillard, La Vie en Rose

*Laura Linney, The Savages

Ellen Page, Juno


Okie-dokie, here it goes. Julie Christie was brilliant, no doubt about it- but a huge part of why her performance was so moving was Gordon Pinsent. I understand why he wasn't nominated, but he was a huge part of why that movie and her role worked so well. Ellen Page on the other hand carried Juno. She was Juno, and will have a hard time transcending that role. She acted brilliantly despite some sketchy writing here and there, and her age. She showed a depth and maturity in tackling that character that would be difficult for anyone. I love Julie Christie, but the nod's to Page to me.


Best Actor in a Leading Role


George Clooney, Michael Clayton

Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood

Johnny Depp, Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

*Tommy Lee Jones, In the Valley of Elah

Viggo Mortensen, Eastern Promises


Le sigh. Daniel Day Lewis will win, but let's be clear, just because he was ROBBED in 2003 from his Gangs of New York oscar, doesn't mean he gets it now. Same goes to Johnny Depp, who is not allowed to win just because they wanted to give it to him for something artier than Pirates of the Carribean. I thought Viggo Mortenson was brilliant. BUT I would like to give an honourary mention to someone who should at the very LEAST be on the list. James McAvoy gave far and away the best performance in Atonement, and was probably the best thing about the movie. Given more screen time (rewrite! rewrite!) he could easily have been on the list.





Best Achievement in Directing


Paul Thomas Anderson, There Will Be Blood

Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, No Country for Old Men

Tony Gilroy, Michael Clayton

Jason Reitman, Juno

Julian Schnabel, Scaphandre et le papillon, Le


The Coen Brothers are poised to take it and I agree that they should. No Country was a well paced, well acted, well shot movie, and I will be damned if I admit that it should be best picture. So this is what you get instead.



Best Adapted Screenplay


Atonement

Away From Her

*The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

No Country for Old Men

There Will Be Blood


Quite frankly anything apart from Atonement should probably win. It will become clear as this list goes on that I was no great fan of the Oscar favourites this year No Country and There Will Be Blood so I suspect that's shading my opinion of the writing. Away from Her is beautifully written and it's an absolute shame that Sarah Polley isn't up for Best Director so I'm defaulting to giving her the writing oscar.


Best Achievement in Cinematography


The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007): Roger Deakins

Atonement (2007): Seamus McGarvey

No Country for Old Men (2007): Roger Deakins

Scaphandre et le papillon, Le (2007): Janusz Kaminski

There Will Be Blood (2007): Robert Elswit

This is a no brainer. Whatever I liked and didn't like in No Country, it is undeniably well shot and well paced. It is absolutely an "achievement in cinematography".



Best Achievement in Art Direction


*American Gangster (2007): Arthur Max, Beth A. Rubino

Atonement (2007): Sarah Greenwood, Katie Spencer

*The Golden Compass (2007): Dennis Gassner, Anna Pinnock

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007): Dante Ferretti, Francesca Lo Schiavo

There Will Be Blood (2007): Jack Fisk, Jim Erickson


My brother and I will disagree on this, but I'm a big fan of Sweeney for this one. I thought that it was a visually fantastic movie, and while I agree that it was (as Scott brilliantly put it) "Tim Burton at his Tim Burton-est", it was the artistic elements of the direction that stood out (as opposed to the acting and pacing elements that made No Country so excellent)



Best Achievement in Costume Design


Across the Universe (2007): Albert Wolsky

Atonement (2007): Jacqueline Durran

Elizabeth: The Golden Age (2007): Alexandra Byrne

*Môme, La (2007): Marit Allen

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007): Colleen Atwood


I'm seriously divided between Sweeney Todd and Atonement on this one. As you know I tend to look at the Academy Awards in context of "What really stood out about that movie?". For Sweeney Todd I think that the costuming was a big part of is, but Atonement's military garb was spot on. I wasn't that convinved at the period authenticity of Keira Knightly's green dress though, so I suppose that tips it for Sweeney Todd.



Best Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures, Original Song


*August Rush (2007): Jamal Joseph, Charles Mack, Tevin Thomas("Raise It Up")

Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz("Happy Working Song")

Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz("So Close")

Enchanted (2007): Alan Menken, Stephen Schwartz("That's How You Know")

Once (2006): Glen Hansard, Markéta Irglová(“Falling Slowly” )


This was a pretty cool movie, and the best part of it was naturally its music. I recommend it, unless you really can't handle poor production quality (I couldn't help whispering "Buy a fricking tripod" to my brother when we watched it). But obviously this has no effect on the music. Right. Still see Once.






Best Animated Feature Film of the Year


Persepolis (2007): Vincent Paronnaud, Marjane Satrapi

*Ratatouille (2007): Brad Bird

Surf's Up (2007): Ash Brannon, Chris Buck


I suppose the favourite is Ratatouille, so I ought not comment on Persepolis's vast superiority. Though I inevitably assume it :)



Best Documentary, Features


*No End in Sight (2007): Charles Ferguson, Audrey Marrs

*Operation Homecoming: Writing the Wartime Experience (2007): Richard Robbins

Sicko (2007): Michael Moore, Meghan O'Hara

*Taxi to the Dark Side (2007): Alex Gibney, Eva Orner

*War Dance (2007): Andrea Nix, Sean Fine

This time around I've only seen one of the pictures, but I felt the need to comment. I watched an illegal copy of Michael Moore's Sicko before it was released in theatres. It was very Moore in fashion: basically tells you a lot of what you already know, makes some statements that are bold, some gutsy, some unfair. What I will say for Moore is that he had a lot of balls taking 9/11 rescue workers to Cuba for the free medical treatment they couldn't receive in the US. Some will say that he painted an unfair picture of Cuba- I argue that it makes one consider how bad the American health care system can be that Cuba can ever be made to look like good-guys.


and finally...


Best Picture


Atonement

Juno

Michael Clayton

No Country for Old Men

There Will Be Blood


Away from Her



Fine. Michael Clayton. Just because I liked it the best. And because it has no chance of winning. It's like my Toronto Maple Leafs of film.

Finchy is a Death Eater

Those of us who are fans of the British Office have known it for years.

Ralph Inerson, who plays Chris Finch (the travelling salesman) on The Office (Gervais's), will be playing Amycuss Carrow in the final two Harry Potter movies. If anyone else has seen The Office Christmas special (again UK), and read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, you'll appreciate that I now have a very clear picture of Professor McGonagall telling Amycuss Carrow to "Fuck Off"

Now I know some people are going to say "Liz, by bringing up his role on The Office, while talking about his newest casting project, you are just encouraging people to see Ralph Inerson as his character and not an actor". Well maybe you aren't saying it, but I still want to weigh in on this particular acting issue.

Personally, if I do ever become a famous actor and I have one particular role follow me around the rest of my life, I will take it as a great accomplishment to have so embodied that part that people are so attached to. Granted I do kind of feel sorry for Mackenzie Crook getting called "Gareth" on the street, but he should know that it's because he's fricken awesome.

I was thinking about this last night as I watched Family Guy. Something I don't make a big habit of doing, but there was nothing else on. James Woods was the guest star, and the plot was that he had taken over Peter's identity (props to Family Guy: they had James Woods say "it's just like that time..." and Peter go into a rage that he was stealing his "cut scene" jokes). The whole time I was listening to James Wood's voice on his animated body being evil...






I'm sure that James Woods does not consider this the pinnacle of his acting career, but it's my favourite thing he's done... possibly apart from being a clerk at the Kwicki Mart.


I love character actors. Even actors who have a great "range" have at least one character that they are often identified with- A recent favourite character of mine has become Dr. House played by the incomparable Hugh Laurie (are you listening David Yates? Rufus Scrimgeour!). Yes, Hugh Laurie is a remarkable actor with a lot of range, but House will probably follow him everywhere from now on. I have a sneaking suspicion that he'll still get work. He's a pretty amazing actor. Plus I want him to look at my charts and figure out what I'm allergic to. I'm sure he can.

Shortly I will be weighing in on the Oscars, and I'm sure the topic of acting will re-surface. The question of whether or not an actor has stretched themselves, created a memorable character, and whether they maintain that character without slipping into THEIR character (*cough Sweeny Sparrow* cough*) always surfaces amongst critics around Oscar season. I am renting Elizabeth this week, and hoping to get out to see There Will be Blood before Sunday. By Saturday I ought to be well versed enough to make a few predictions. Until then!

The Litmus Test of Music-Dickery

The Are You a Music Snob? Quiz
an original quiz by Liz Buchanan

Pick the answer that is the most right for you.


1. When you download music you use:

a) Puretracks <1>
b) iTunes <2>
c) Kazaa, Limewire, or something else free <3>
d) I don't listen to Mp3s, they will never surpass the great sound of vinyl <4>


2. As a musician the highest honour you can recieve is:

a) The Cover of the Rolling Stone <2>
b) The Polaris Prize <3>
c) A Grammy <1>
d) Not getting ripped to shreds by Pitchfork.com <4>

3. Music to you is:

a) What makes life worthwhile <3>
b) Not that important <1>
c) Something you really enjoy <2>
d) The purest expression of the soul through the rythm of the human spirit <4>

4. You rock out to:

a) Angels and Airwaves <4>
b) The White Stripes <3>
c) Greenday <2>
d) Celine Dion <1>

5. The best musical guest star on the Simpsons was:

a) The Smashing Pumpkins <3>
b) George Harrison was pretty cool <2>
c) The Simpsons jumped the shark a long time ago, who even watches that anymore? <4>
d) Starland Vocal Band <1>

6. Your favourite part of Juno was:

a) Haven't seen it <1>
b) When Ellen Page and Michael Cera play quitar at the end. Nice cover. <3>
c) The fact that she named her guitar Roosevelt "not Ted- Franklin. You know, the cute one, with polio." <2>
d) When she rips on Sonic Youth. <4>

7. If you owned a music store it would most likely resemble:

a) A Sunrise Records <2>
b) Empire Records. Damn the man, save the Empire! <3>
c) Rob Gordon's record store in High Fidelity <4>
d) I would just franchise an HMV <1>

8. The most tragic death in modern music history was:

a) John Lennon <2>
b) Kurt Cobain <4>
c) Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Bopper <3>
d) Britney Spear's career <1>

9. Jim Morrison was:

a) Pretty Cool <2>
b) The Greatest Musician Ever <3>
c) Over-rated <4>
d) That guy from the Doors, right? <1>

10. If your all-time favourite band's name describes you, you are a:

a) beetle <1>
b) led zeppelin <3>
c) rolling stone <2>
d) tool <4>


Scores:

(10-15)

Music is defined as the art of arranging sounds in time so as to produce a continuous, unified, and evocative composition, as through melody, harmony, rhythm, and timbre. American popular music is largely traced back to its african and european roots, reflecting both traditional folk music and african beats and syncopation. To learn more about music and it's place in popular american culture buy a fricken radio.

(16-24)
You have your tastes in music and other people have theirs. You are mostly familiar with mainstream music and you enjoy listening to the radio. Nothing wrong with that, but you might enjoy expanding your tastes and developing a broader range of musical choices. You have the good sense to listen to what you like, but not rip on everyone else for disagreeing with you.

(25-34)
You've probably got "good taste in music", whatever the hell that means. You won't just listen to any crap because it's popular, but you aren't going to be an ass about it either. Make sure that music stays fun, and you're as open-minded about pop-music and country as you are about rock. You don't have to like it, you just have to be reasonable.

(35-40)
You're a music snob. It's OK, I kind of am too. But seriously... Angels and Airwaves? Have you seen their new album cover? What a bunch of dicks. That aside- dude, get over it. There's always going to be someone who knows more about music, has more discerning tastes and is a bigger douche than you. I suggest a cleansing. Go put on K-Lite FM for a half an hour and make yourself sing along with "So you had a bad day". Seriously, it'll be therapeutic. Or torture. Either way...


You should consider these results legally binding, as I am a certified Music-personality-ologist.

In the meantime however...

Don't get me wrong, I support the WGA- but you can't write late night TV this great:




PS: I have made it to temporary Word Sandwich glory:

Today´s top five
rank name city score date quickest avg
1 terrio Hayward 13402 2/5/2008 6 10.2
2 Liz Toronto 12582 2/5/2008 7 11.4
3 peter hartford 12396 2/5/2008 10 12.4
4 Vainamoinen Kalevala 12264 2/5/2008 11 12.6
5 smilla seattle 12216 2/5/2008 8 12

indicently not my best score, but my best record of the day... what the hell time is it?

A Call for Submissions

I have decided to have a theme for February's posting here. I am going to examine my own, and other people's influences. This is a look at the things that move me, be they artistically, politically, personally, whatever.

My first project is Words that Move. So I'm giving everyone here 1 week to think of their favourite segment(s) from a book or play that have had an impact on their lives. It can be any book or play regardless of genre, with the exception of a quotionary, as I am doing spoken word later.
I am then compiling them and we shall take a look at themes, sources and overlaps.

Thus please do not be afraid to submit anything from Milton to Munch, Shakespeare to Seuss. No one is judging your literary prowess here, I already know everyone here has a degree/Masters in English and/or reads at an 800th grade level (why else would you be at my blog?- ha ha).

Just show me the passages that make you love this great passtime we call reading.

"The so-called Mysteries have been with us forever. There is not a society on the face of the earth that does not and did not have its own version of what these Mysteries reveal of the Great Spirit, God, the gods and their relationshio to our lives- and our lives to theirs...
In modern times we call such Mysteries art. Our greatest Shamans of the moment are Rodin, Stravinsky (much as I hate his music) and Mann. And what else are they telling us but: go back and look again. In time, these shamans will be replaced by others- but all speaking in a single voice. It was ever thus. But no one ever listens." -Pilgrim, Timothy Findley

Power Thirst

This video from CollegeHumour.com does not require any set up from me. I simply invite you to enjoy:

#5

**** apologies to everyone who tried to read the previous version of this as a spelling nightmare. It was late and I did not double check my sentences for errors and edits ****

I have a new occupant on my list of "freebie list".

By "freebie list" I am of course refering to the Friends episode where they talk about having a list of five celebrities that "you can have sex with and no one can get upset".

It is well known that Ewan McGregor is #1 on my list, but of course who would get upset? He is my boyfriend.

#2 is Jon Stewart, #3 is Matt Stajan (who is as of today a forward on the Toronto Maple Leafs). Recently I added a new number 4 in the person of one Jason Isaacs. If anyone can do campy villain sexier than that... well I guess they can steal his spot.



Tonight I decided on a new #5. Past occupants have included Dave Matthews, Wynton Marsalis, Dave Chapelle, Johnny Depp and that guy that plays Warrick on CSI.

But my new #5 is...


drum roll please






I think that Stephen may be replacing Jon slowly as my comedic crush. Just as Jon once replaced a 1970s Alan Alda who replaced a 1960s Micheal Palin.

Mind you if I do ever perfect that time machine I started in grade 11...



** Also, on a more serious note, read Angelo's blog as he has posted a very nice tribute to Heath Ledger

Phew

Which Office character are you?



You are most like Pam Beesly, the friendly voice of reason in a sometimes chaotic workplace. The bright spots of your day include pulling practical jokes, playing FreeCell on your computer and making people happy by doing extra, unnecessary work.


That quiz could have gone a lot worse.

May the Farce be with You

Strangely, I wonder if his ability to impersonate Frank Oz characters ever made George Lucas consider double casting him as Yoda:

Word of the Day

I need a new home page. I currently have a personalized MSN homepage with links to this web log and Farcebook, as well as a news feed from CBC, TSN and MTV. This is all fine. What I really ought to get rid of is my MSN Encarta word of the day.
I started writing them down when I noticed that the overall difficulty seemed to be decreasing:

hubris
fallacy
charlatan
debase
congenital
catharsis
impertinent
moniker
omniscient

while they are undoubtably very fun words, and I am not calling anyone who does not know their meaning foolish, "Word of the Day" is supposed to specialize in teaching me words that are obscure and out of common usage, the kind that will help me win in Scrabble and look smart when I post. Not words I had to write definitions to in Grade 10 English. Mind you, I should probably try to use "moniker" more often.

Well even if I don't get rid of Encarta I have to do something about my horoscope:

"You may feel like you are walking a young puppy that just does not want to stay still, dear Aries. The puppy is curious and at times rather reckless, as he does not know of the dangers of cars or a twisted leash. You have a great responsibility to teach this dog some lessons while at the same time giving him a bit of free rein to go out and explore on his own. Earn the respect of others by tempering discipline with fun."

I'm going to go ahead and file that under "WTF?"

"Animals Close-Up With a Wide-Angle Lens"

Little Angel Liz on right shoulder: Elizabeth, don't forget, you promised your web log readers that you would post today.

Little Devil Liz on left shoulder: Oh for crying out loud, like anyone's even going to notice.

Little Angel Liz: I'm sure her readers have noticed a slight improvement in her posting of late, and are now holding her to a higher standard of writing.

Little Devil Liz: Oh please, just stick a cute animal picture up and go back to your decaf and Futurama Season II DVD.

Little Angel Liz: I'm sure that Liz would never stoop to something so broad and banal when she's working so hard on improving the quality of her web log.




2 hours later:

Lyrics of the "Is it really THAT late?"

"The New Year" -Death Cab for Cutie

So this is the new year.
And i don't feel any different.
The clanking of crystal
Explosions off in the distance (in the distance).

So this is the new year
And I have no resolutions
For self assigned penance
For problems with easy solutions


Someone feeling a little bitter? Hee hee hee.


Better post tomorrow. I promise. Call it a resolution of improvement on this post.

2007: A final look back (Stolen from Angedrew)

IN THE BEGINNING OF 2007...

Where did you begin 2007?
In Falcon Bridge at Luke D. Norton's

Did you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
No.

How old were you?
23

What was your outlook on the world?
Meh.

How were you doing at school/your job?
I was mostly bemused to discover that no one at work seemed to notice if I was there or not.

What did you most look forward to?
Getting home at night to watch Simpson DVDs

Did you make New Year's Resolutions?
I'd like to think that the answer is no. Otherwise it bodes very poorly for my stick-to-it-iveness.

What was your biggest worry?
That no one at work seemed to notice whether or not I was there. Exactly how long would I decay at home before anyone worried?

Who was your best friend?
Jenny, Andrew and Steph

What did you do with your spare time?
DVDs, Gameboy, Guitar on occasion

Describe your birthday?
I worked a double, and was then treated to DQ and Charlie Chaplin.

IN THE MIDDLE OF 2007: THE SUMMER!

Did you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
No. I sense a theme...

Had your outlook on the world changed?
Actually I was a great deal more cheerful

What did you spend your summer doing?
Filming a movie, working at Easter Seals Camp Woodeden, and standing in line for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

Did you get a tan?
A little.

Who'd you hang out with?
Zach and Yvonne, my family and on a rather notable evening Andrew and a young man who required an endless supply of stories.

Did you go visit anywhere?
Stratford

What was your biggest worry?
Money.

What was the most fun event that happened?
I was so pleasantly surprised my enjoyment of the Simpson's movie I seem to always think of that. I also had a lot of fun at camp.

AND AS THE YEAR DRAWS TO AN END...

Still got a significant other?
Stupid questionaire thingy

How old are you?
24

Any new additions to your family?
Not quite yet. We have a new comer August 2008 marrying in. That's right. Some people actually chose to join!

What music will you remember 2007 by?
The Arcade Fire

Best movie you saw this year?
Fido

What major changes have happened since the year began?
I've been through several jobs, and am now at one that I actually enjoy. I entered and exitted a college program I loathed and I've moved to Toronto.

Is your life any different from when it started this year?
Quite a lot. I am much happier and less anxious. I had a good summer, which helped get me back on track and more serene.

What thing that happened stands out in your mind?
Going back to Woodeden had a very good effect on me, but truthfully the thing that effected me the most was having my best friends all move to Paris.

How have you changed?
I'm a little less ridiculously pessimistic. Mind you ask me how I feel about life next time I'm menstrating and this quiz might look a lot different.

Are you happy with how the year went?
It is the first summer that I have enjoyed in years. The last half of the year went OK I supposed. Meh, like Angelo said: It happened.

FOR 2008...

Do you think it'll be better or worse than this year?
It'll be more interesting.

What do you plan to do next year?
Get out of debt. Ha!!

What are your New Year's resolutions?
To make at least some effort at actually acting.

AND TO WRAP IT UP...

What's one thing would you like to say as the year is done?

I am going to Bonnaro this year, regardless of financial capabilities. Who's with me?

Oh Eight

I have absolutely no doubt that this year will be an eventful one.

My new years resolution is to make a real effort at acting.

I have this amazing job at ErinOak, but I don't get enough hours. It is time to force myself to take acting seriously and try to get work. If only the infamous words of Homer weren't ringing in my ears. "Trying is the first step towards failure".

None the less...

I am also determined to quite playing the hermit. I have been spending too much time brooding alone in my apartment in TO. Good for reading, blogging and general geekdom, very bad for friendships and attracting the opposite sex. Would you believe that most men do not list "Skills at Nintendo Wii" or "Watched Seasons 4-7 of the Simpsons with commentaries on" on their "Attractive Attributes" list? Something about having a good personality and breasts... whatever.

And here's a very special episode of Scrubs:



I heart Scrubs.

Elliot: Can't we just go home, put on our PJs and watch Grey's Anatomy?
JD: I do love that show, it's like they've been watching our lives and put it on TV