40 Flicks

I'm actually kind of proud of that pun.

I have rearranged this SEVERAL times. In fact it will probably be rearranged again by the time I finish writing this.

Liz's Top 40 Movies of All Time

And what does my taste in movies say about me?

I'm not sure that I would take this as "Liz would rather watch Casablanca than Office Space" or "Liz thinks that the South Park movie was more artistically brilliant than Citizen Kane".... the thing is.... it's a balance. I went through my favourite movies and thought about which movies, for me, were the most enjoyable and at the same time had a quality that I feel has given them a special place in the film world. For instance I do not think that Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail is the all time greatest movie. I would probably have to go Casablance there :P But I like it the most. Big Fish is one that I put high on my list. Probably not history's GREATEST piece of film-making, but I think that there are 45 minutes in there that are pretty darn fantastic. And yes. Ewan is hot.

I'm posting this, and while I expect a tidal wave of "Are you serious?" I guess I'm over it, and it's time to stop justifying my picks. I'm no film buff, I just enjoy a well made, entertaining film. There are lots I wish I could stick on there that I couldn't, but I am proud that I managed to avoid doing something like sticking "A Clockwork Orange" or "Resevoire Dogs" on there "just because". I have always felt that it was important to maintain a level of snobbishness about movies. While I think it is important to stay open-minded enough about films to at least give them a try, I will never pretend to like something I can't stand. That, to me, is more pretentious than refusing to watch any more Michael Bay movies on moral grounds.

Scott Buchanan: Bachelor of Arts and Irish Tourist. Damn him!

The University of Windsor is located underneath of a bridge:



The most recent article to be published by internationally recognized faculty: "The Property of Billy Goats and How to Catch Them"

My brother, as always, is too cool for the family:



Fortunately we managed to loser it up, by throwing him a tiny fan in line and by Mom having a few too many celebratory drinks (seriously Mom, stick with that story)


After the long... long ceremony:






And finally, for those of you who are unaware of a serious epidemic involving hand-held communication devices, here is "Scott's Graduation Crackberry Edition":

Stolen from the Book of Face

Instructions:
"FACEBOOK (ahem Blogger) SCATTERGORIES.. it's harder than it looks!
Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following...They MUST be real places, names, things...NOTHING made up! Try to use different answers if the person in front of you had the same 1st initial. You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl name question."


Your Name: Liz

Famous Artist/Band/Musician: Leonardo DaVinci/Led Zeppelin/Lou Reed

4 letter word: Luck

Vehicle: Lexus

TV Show: Little House on the Prairie

City: Luxemburg

Boy Name: Liam

Girl Name: Leah

Alcoholic drink: Liquor

Occupation: Lawyer

Flower: Lupin

Something you wear: Lace

Something you do: Love

Something that you dislike: Lying

Celeb: Luke Wilson

Food: Lemon

Something found in a kitchen: Ladel

Reason for Being Late: Lost track of time

Cartoon Character: Lisa Simpson

Something you yell: Leave me alone!


**************************

Also I think that this would have made a nice addition to my last post... but here it is now anyway:

"A view from the desk of Dilbert creator Scott Adams"

Scott Adams is spying on me at work

Gee Ma I wanna go to Southern Ontario!

I am heading home tomorrow evening for a few days in the thriving metropolis of York Ontario (not to be confused with the region of York in Toronto which actually is a thriving metroplois). I will be visiting with family and friends and with ANY luck I will be attending my brother's graduation in Windsor. Also, I am auditioning for the Acting for Film and Television program at Humber. The very cool thing about this program: not only is it taught by some very sweet Second City and Toronto School of Film alumni and former staff, but it also gets me a credit towards ACTRA and gets my feet wet in Toronto in a slightly less frightening way than showing up in the city with no job and no money.

Which is of course plan C :)

On another, and equally important, note: Pirates of the Carribean: At World's End is, thus far, in the lead (as far as I'm concerned) for summer movies. I think that it may be time to put my I heart Captain Jack Sparrow button back on my purse.

Liz the Conservative

This is what makes me a lousy politician. I don't know whether I even agree with his politics, but I would vote for Bill Casey. He is in fact dissenting from the Conservatives for not being Conservative enough (as I gather).
On the surface, as a liberal, I probably ought to agree that Nova Scotia should share its wealth with the other Atlantic provinces in this instance- I guess- truthfully I don't understand the situation nearly enough to expand.

What I do understand is integrity: a rarity in politics, but a quality that I hold higher possibly even than the politician's beliefs themselves.
I feel that by defying his party and standing up for his province, whether right or wrong, Bill Casey showed integrity. And we all know what happens to those with integrity in Ottawa...

Conservative MP Bill Casey was booted out of the Tory caucus hours after he broke ranks with his party on Tuesday night and voted against a bill to implement the federal budget.

The Nova Scotia MP said he couldn't support the budget because it doesn't allow his province to fully benefit from offshore oil and gas revenues without losing equalization payments from the federal government.

When Casey rose to his feet to cast his "Nay" vote, cheers and shouts erupted in the House of Commons.

The budget implementation bill, which sets the Conservative's March 19 budget into action, still passed by a margin of 158-108. It was a preliminary vote, with a third and final reading of the bill expected later this week.

Bloc Québécois MPs and all Conservatives except Casey banded together to ensure the bill passed on Tuesday. The Liberals and the NDP voted against it.

Casey, a veteran backbencher, said the government had promised Nova Scotia and Newfoundland and Labrador that it wouldn't include offshore oil and gas revenues in its equalization formula.

"I believe that the government of Canada signed a contract with my province of Nova Scotia and it's not being honoured," Casey told CBC News earlier Tuesday in Ottawa.

"Whether it's by accident or not, the budget was amended, and that amendment was not agreed to by the provinces, who also signed it. So only one side of this agreement changed it and approved this amendment.

"I don't think that's right."

Casey wanted Flaherty to make changes to the budget before the third reading, but Flaherty rejected calls Tuesday in the House of Commons to do so.

The current budget offers the two provinces a choice between two options:

- A new, enriched equalization formula that includes a cap on the amount of offshore oil and gas revenues the provinces can keep.

- The old equalization formula, with the benefits from the Atlantic Accord on offshore oil and gas revenues that was negotiated by the former Liberal government in 2004.

Casey, who was first elected to Parliament as a Progressive Conservative, said the new budget could cost Nova Scotia up to $1 billion.

With files from the Canadian Press

Notes on failure

Some time ago I made a wonderful discovery. I auditioned for that show I was in last summer, A Comedy of Errors, and at first I thought that I hadn't been cast. When I first began to absorb the defeat I realized something. I was pretty OK with it. More so than I had been with any other show. Mostly because when I thought back to my previous failing (see all 800 posts about how I wanted to be Ophelia in Hamlet sept-nov 2005) and thought, well hey this isn't nearly as bad as that was. Probably no role will ever crush me like that. Not just because it was Ophelia, but a chance to play it in my final year of university in a show with my close friends. It sucked a lot. I worked very hard and I didn't get it. But I made the most of it and moved on with life. Most importantly I know now that I can audition for anything and nothing will ever hurt like that again, so I will always be able to take the high road and move on.

So that is how I shall regard my latest sour news. I did not get in to York Univeristy's MFA program. This was also largely based on an audition as well as several letters of intent and recommendation, a CV, transcripts and a whole lot of work that is feeling slightly in vain now. I spent a lot of time and money and energy on that school and I have to admit, despite my best attempts to remain level headed, I really wanted to get in. It has been a tough pill to swallow, but it was the school that I wanted the absolute most. There are going to be a lot of no's in the world of acting for me, so it is good to have hit a big ass one right now. The program may have been very cool but there is nothing stopping me from reading plays and learning more about acting on my own.
The important thing now is to move on, so that the next time I am applying to school or for an actor training program I will have this experience to teach me that I am capable of carrying on.

Theatre and acting have probably had the ability, even more than love, to make me my happiest and most destroyed. My happiest moment in all of high school was having the play that my friends and I wrote win at the Sears Drama Festival while we all won awards for acting and writing. Being a theatre student at Laurentian was probably the greatest time in my life so far. I will never forget the first time I really felt "it" on stage, or rehearsing Taming of the Shrew with Josh, or watching Brie's face as she walked off stage after her monologue for the Vagina Monologues, the standing ovation we got at the end of Isobel, or the overwhelming response Andrew's performance earned in Hamlet, or doing my scene with Frank in Aminta . These are some of the greatest memories I have and it is in these moments that I know I'm alive and none of the other crap in all the world really matters. I'm there on stage or back stage or just in that damn theatre with all my energy and heart poured into every minute and something wonderful happens.

I guess I can't really describe it.

"I found a whole bunch of friends with the same dream, and that makes us kind of like a family..."


So that's where it's at. Life feels pretty miserable right now, but that's only because I love theatre so much and it has made me feel so wonderful. It might not always make me happy, and I don't know if it's the ONLY thing I can ever do. But people who say "the only way you'll ever be an actor is if it's the only thing you can ever see yourself doing" are idiots. If you can't see yourself being anything other than an actor how the hell are you supposed to be a fire fighter or a CEO or a teacher or any of the other thousands of roles you will have to be in a play. If I'm going to get good at this art what I have to do is keeping on living like an artist.
Even if it hurts.

Well I'll let Butters tell you the rest:




GOTH KID: Well I guess you can join up with us-
GOTH KID #2: Yeah, we're gonna go to the grave yard and write poems about how pointless life is.
BUTTERS: Uh, no thanks, I love life.
STAN: Huh? But you just got dumped!
BUTTERS: Well yeah and I'm sad, but at the same time I'm really happy that something could make me feel that sad. It's like it makes me feel alive, you know? It makes me feel human. The only way I could feel this sad now is if I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good, so I guess what I'm feeling is a beautiful sadness. I guess that sounds stupid.
GOTH KID #2: Yeah.
STAN: No Butters, that doesn't sound stupid at all.
BUTTERS: But thanks for offering to let me be in your clique. But to be honest, I'd rather be a crying little pussy than a $#%&$@ goth kid.

What would the movie of your life be called?

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Working title: Lord of the Bongs- The Fellow-ness of the Liz

Perfect timing

Blog Therapy II

I have trusted a known compulsive liar with information closest to my heart, yet I cannot trust my friends, family or significant others when they say that they love me.

I don't fear abandonment. I assume it.

I have been meaning to do this for a long time. And some one else needs to hear this to help make it real.

C J: You taught me what it is to have a broken heart. You still have not apologized. You were my best friend for the toughest years of school, through awkward tween-dom into adolesence. You were the first friend that I felt I could talk to about anything and not be judged. I thought that you might be one of the only people who had ever really understood me. You took me out on my first date. When you moved away from Cayuga you promised that we would always stay friends, and even wrote "To Liz, my bestest friend for ever, love Chris" on a picture that I still have.

You made a promise that you could not keep.

I guess that's what I've always believed: that no one can really keep that promise. And so I have never trusted anyone to love me that does not constantly reaffirm it. It has screwed with my relationships and friendships for WAY too long. It ends now. You were an asshole. You lied. But, even though you've never asked for it: I forgive you. Because I'm over it.

Free Speech*

Thank goodness there's no censorship on the internet.



*Some conditions may apply, see in store for details. Offer not valid in France, Germany, China, the United States, the United Kingdom and the Islamic world. Employees, News Reporters or Activists from Anti-Religious/Governmental biased organizations may not apply. All applicatnts must answer skill testing question: "What is the square root of 6,784,942,115?".

Why do I Still Get a Daily Horoscope?

From the people that brought you "anything planted in the ground will be certain to grow today" in February:


Aries
March 20 - April 18
Your heart is going pitter-patter, dear Aries, and you are tempted to escape into a romantic fantasyland in which you play the starring role. The bad news is that something may be trying to hold you back. It could be that evil is coming on the scene and reminding you that work needs to be done here on Earth before you can go off into your own little fairy-tale world.

... what?

Lyrics of the Night

BARBER:
I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay.
I sleep all night and I work all day.
MOUNTIES:
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I eat my lunch.
I go to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays I go shoppin'
And have buttered scones for tea.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He eats his lunch.
He goes to the lavatory.
On Wednesdays he goes shoppin'
And has buttered scones for tea.
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I skip and jump.
I like to press wild flowers.
I put on women's clothing
And hang around in bars.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He skips and jumps.
He likes to press wild flowers.
He puts on women's clothing
And hangs around in bars?!
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
BARBER:
I cut down trees. I wear high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra.
I wish I'd been a girlie,
Just like my dear Papa.
MOUNTIES:
He cuts down trees. He wears high heels,
Suspendies, and a bra?!
[talking]
What's this? Wants to be a girlie?! Oh, My!
And I thought you were so rugged! Poofter!
[singing]
He's a lumberjack, and he's okay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
He's a lumberjack, and he's okaaaaay.
He sleeps all night and he works all day.

A Dog Day Afternoon

Two nights ago I came upon a stranger on Lasalle Blvd across from Walmart.



sigh...

She is beautiful. A Husky/Collie (I think). I have called the Sudbury Animal Control/Shelter, and submitted her picture to the online database. They offered to come and pick her up, but at the time I said "She's no trouble, I don't mind hanging on to her for a day or two". Sigh. Now we have a problem.
The longer she stays here the less likely she is going to the shelter. We've been taking short walks (away from the Cambrian security centre). She is super friendly- if not a little attention starved :p and doesn't seem to bark or bite or cause any trouble at all. I find it hard to believe that someone won't call for her soon. Then the shelter will call me immediately and she can go home to her family...

I have an audience!

And all I had to do was sulk to find out. Geez guys if I'd known people were reading I would have put worthwhile things up here. As it is... ummmm...

http://www.myheritage.com

Insert Title Here

What does it matter? you're all on Facebook now anyways


That's not true, Erica is still here ;) Although she's probably hung-over. I am.


Truely I'm updating whether or not there are people here because I realized something the other night. After years of trying to force myself to keep a journal, I finally have. I have been writing in this stupid thing for almost 2 years now and even if it hasn't improved my creative writing one ounce, I do have a sort of portal to my past out of it. Which is a little cool.

Status: I still have not heard back from Grad school. And it is not amusing me. I am emailing Concordia today to find out what is going on because I'm getting a little anxious. Actually replace "a little" with "excessively" and the word "anxious" with "insane".
Zellers is Zellers and peddling booze is peddling booze. It pays the bills, I hate most of humanity most of the time and everything would be a lot better if I didn't have "performance goals" and "high fives" and "bosses" and could just do my damn job. Actually I like my Check-out manager at Zellers. But pretty much everyone else I report to is a dick.
Cambrian rez is actually a pretty great place to live. I have a temporary but very cool roomate. I never thought I would actually be sad to have a whole apartment to myself, but I'm enjoying having her here. She's very easy going, and we've been chatting a swapping life stories. Here is a brief view of my semi-decorated rez room:



I kid of course, I will eventually purchase hangers, but for now I kind of enjoy the look. It's actually quite a nice size as well. As for security... heh heh heh, well I had to resort to a little breaking and entering the other night as a result of locking my keys in my room. I am happy to report that the window-screen frames easily bend and are in fact large enough for me to pass through at an upward angle.


I guess that's really all to report for now. Another update another day :)

"Your weapons, you will not need them"

Last night I faced off against my greatest enemy.


"Know thy self, know thy enemy" -Sun Tzu

"Don't bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors.
Try to be better than yourself." -William Faulkner

"Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see." -Jack Handy

Not ONE word out of any of you.

Liz Buchanan -- [adjective]: Banshee-like 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Snoopy vs The Medium Sized Baron

A bunch of Zellers Graphic Tees went on sale this week, but the largest size I could find for any of them was medium. I thought I would try my luck with an adorable blue shirt with Snoopy and Charlie Brown (it has them cuddling and reads "All You Need Is Love"). But unfortunately it was a little too tiny for my upper-half :S

Dismayed I do what I do with every piece of cool clothing I find that doesn't fit me. I gave it to a friend. But today I thought I would try my luck again and tried on another medium shirt. For reasons I'll never comprehend this one fit.

Behold the world of Peanuts in all its glory!

In case you didn't get the email

Hello All,

This year's summer Shakespeare (or "Shakespeare on the Grass" as I believe it is called), will be As You Like It. This is a casting call! I will be holding auditions next Monday and Tuesday. They are cold reads (so don't try to memorize a two page soliloquy between now and then). Please let me know if you can't make it and still want to be involved, I understand that this is very short notice.

Here's the skinny: Rehearsals will be from 6-9 on Tuesdays and Thursdays and I will likely add some Sunday evening rehearsals closer to the show (transportation permitting). This will make the rehearsal process intense as the show will go on as is tradition on the final full weekend of June. The dates are June 21-24. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. That's seven weeks people, but we CAN and WILL do it and it will be awesome!

I'm looking for 6 males and 4 females who are committed, hard working, love to act and have a decent grasp of classical text. Don't sweat the auditions. All I'm looking for is if you can read Shakespeare and take direction.

Please forward this on to everyone you think will be interested. Post it on Facebook and your blogs. I will be thankful.

Hope to see as many people out as possible, and if anyone is interested in SMing for a Theatre Practicum, please let me know ASAP. Also you can use an acting role as a Practicum as well.


Lots of love,

Liz

While my guitar gently weeps

Recently I have been picking away at my guitar. I learned a couple of new simple songs, and I have been using it to aid in my singing. Part of my York audition was to sing an unaccompanied song, but I find that practicing with my guitar helps my voice find where it's supposed to be.

But not twenty minutes ago a tragedy occurred. I had leaned my guitar against my laundry hamper hastily last night before conking out for some much needed sleep. This afternoon I carelessly hopped into my computer chair and rolled back. This was the result:




Gentle Ben!

For those unfamiliar with the tradition of guitar naming, generally a male names his guitar after a woman who broke his heart. Since no men (or women) had broken my heart to this point I went for the next closest thing: I named the guitar just after Ben Affleck had begun to date Jennifer Lopez. Plus the name has a lovely ring for a soft accoustic "classical" guitar.

I have had the guitar since I was 11. It was a Christmas present. At the time I was in the Seneca Central guitar club (which largely consisted of myself, Chris Jaic, Willy Harris and Kassandra Killman trying to get out of recess by hanging around inside pretending to learn to play guitar). I took lessons for a short while and then kind of put the guitar aside for a number of years, forgetting virtually everything aside from how some of the chords looked.

A few years ago I picked it up again and started to learn a few songs, with some encouragement from my fella, brother and a few guitar-saavy friends. Gentle Ben has been an easy guitar to learn on with his nylon strings and small body. I will miss him. As a tribute to Ben (not, I promise, as a punishment to anyone else) I am putting up one of the videos I took of myself singing and playing so that I could hear how I sounded.

My singing is its usual shakey self and I kind of screw up during the chorus, but in the immortal words of Mr Burns: "We did 35 takes, and THIS was the best one."

0 Frames per Second

I am off to the camera repair shop (Black's) because I cannot retrieve my photos from Montreal or the rest of my trip. I am fairly certain that my camera or memory card has malfunctioned and erased the entire trip. Bah humbug. Thus I cannot leave you with any lovely pictures or movies of my adventure :(
The good news is that you have yet another opportunity to acquire free booze from yours truly. This time around I'm giving away rum, and I'm at the Algonquin road LCBO from 4 to 8 tonight.



**************************


Also of interest:


"It is widely accepted that in 1971, a group of teenagers at San Rafael High School in San Rafael, California, calling themselves "The Waldos", used to meet every day after school at 4:20 p.m. to smoke marijuana at the Louis Pasteur statue. The term became part of their group's salute, "420 Louis," and it eventually caught on more widely. Many cannabis users continue to observe 4:20 as a time to smoke communally. By extension April 20 ("4/20" in U.S. dating shorthand) has evolved into a counterculture holiday, where people gather to celebrate and consume cannabis.

There are also many apocryphal urban legends attempting to explain the origin of the term. Two of the most common of these are that 420 refers to the number of active ingredients in cannabis (in actuality, there are around 315 active chemicals in cannabis, varying depending on the exact plant used), or that it is a police dispatch code related to cannabis. The San Francisco Police Department use "420" as a dispatch code for juvenile disturbances,and while this explains the origin of the urban legend, does not account for the origin of the term."
- (Wikipedia)

Blog Therapy

To a young man I don't love,

When I saw you tonight, for the first time in five years I got a feeling that I did not expect. You smiled at me and said that you knew I would do great at my audition. Suddenly I was eighteen again.

I was not in love with you. I also did not so much love the "idea of you" but the idea of what you COULD be. I would look at you when you smiled warmly at me and see something that I didn't think anyone else saw. You were the most popular guy at school, good looking, funny and athletic. Every girl had a crush on you and every teacher fawned over you. You acted like a typical jock and were a cocky sarcastic jerk. You were lazy and took advantage of your popularity and status.

But every once in a while I would sit with you in class or on the bus and you would talk to me like you were a real person and I thought I somehow saw the real you. You had something in your eyes that went much deeper than all of this. I saw a potential for you to be something kinder, smarter, more interesting and thoughtful. I then romanticized the day that you would leave your crazy-controlfreak-abnoxious girlfriend and we would run away from Cayuga and all the stupid crap at CSS.

I confused this with love, but in reality it was just a romanticized ideal of your potential. I looked at how hurt you were when you lost your bestfriend and wanted you to be happy again. I looked at the path you were headed down and thought you could do better.

I am glad that even through my starry eyes and distorted adolescent notion of love... that I was right. Way to go.

Overheard in Montreal

Le Fille D'Ontario Est Stupide!

Francophone #1: ????
Francophone #2: ????
Francophone #1: (laughs) ????

---Notre Dame de Grace

Overheard by Ignore_ant_anglo

Alright just kidding. I think I had to pull out the "Parlez vous Anglais?" about three times, and probably only SHOULD have once. Mostly it had to do with my slaughtering of the French language beyond the comprehension of native speakers.


Anyways, what you really wanted:

Overheard in New York

Suit: I was up in Toronto last week. It was nice, but it was really cold.
Guy: Yeah, it's beautiful up there, but they get winter really early. It's like that Shakespeare line, 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.'
Suit: [Befuddled silence.]

--LIRR into Penn Station

I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Pearson

Section B- Problem Solving

1. Liz departs from Montreal at 8:00pm on Saturday to Toronto. The luggage she checks does not accompany her. At 10pm in Toronto she is told that her luggage will arrive at 11pm that night and shipped to her in York the next day by noon. At 5:45pm the next day (Sunday) she receives a telephone call telling her that her luggage has "just" (assume "just" is an undefined variable) arrived in Toronto. The Lester B Pearson International Airport in Toronto is 59.92 Kilometres North East of York. How long will it take for Liz to be reunited with her luggage?

a) 2 hours (assuming light Sunday traffic and an average of 30kms/hour)
b) 24 hours
c) 48 hours
d) "Well probably sometime late Tuesday. You don't have anything important in there do you?"

Something New

I'm off to Montreal for the weekend. I will be auditioning for the Drama and Development program which, theoretically, I will use to qualify for their MA in Drama Therapy.

This path is not so much the hard-core acting path as it is the "combining all things Liz and hoping that works out somehow" path. I would like to work with kids with disabilities doing drama games and puppetry, or at-risk teens doing Shakespeare and Classical productions to buiild character and team work skills.

But part of me still wants to just act. To just follow the dream, move to TO, get an agent and work the theatre/film/TV circuit. I suspect along with a part time gig at the Hudson's Bay Company :S yay.

For that reason I'm auditioning for York's MFA in Acting next Wednesday. I am doing a piece from Waiting for the Parade and Hamlet for my audition. I love both pieces and hope that my off-beat takes on them will play well.

Aside from that I just keep my fingers and toes crossed and pick up as many pennies as I can find.

Here's to a career in the Theatre Arts! (chugs glass of wine)



High diddily dee, an actor's life for me!

As if South Park wasn't enough

And this is why a bunny SHOULD be the Pope. It's the way Jesus would have wanted it.

Bunnies Rule!

A Very Special South Park Easter

After a day of dealing with hundreds of jerks at Zellers who decided to observe Easter by swarming our stores to buy thousands of dollars worth of chocolate it was refreshing to find out that there was indeed a reason.

This is actually beautiful... in a weird way:


http://www.allabout-sp.net/?p=season11/1105

"Can't talk coming down"

I had another unfortunate mental lull amidst the dates surrounding my Birthday. Some of this was probably due to an anaphylactic reaction, being sick to my stomach and over working myself. Still- no excuses- I apologize for any disgruntled nature that came anyone's way. I'm a tool. Probably a wrench.

Despite working on my Birthday I had many high points. I got calls from all of my loving family with varying degrees of our traditional "Happy Birthday wailing". I got some B-Day cash which allowed me to purchase a camera I have been eying for sometime that went on an incredible sale. With it I have thus far taken taken a couple of blog-worthy from the premiere of my first ever professional acting gig-







Thanks also to Brian for the singing & guitar playing Mexican cats... that was what was in the ecard right? I hope I didn't hallucinate again...
Also I got some lovely presents from the likes of Joe MacDonald, in the form of a Gameboy Advance :D. And I got the brand-spanking new Modest Mouse CD and an iTunes card from the Rootman and Hazel-nut, and Stephie got me a book called "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amatuer Theatre" (which I'm pretty sure was the alternate title for Peter Brooke's "The Empty Space). Mr Root also treated me to a Banana split full of empty vitamins. Many thanks all about!!

Anyways, something fascinating discovered on my Birthday:

On March 31st 1981 (two years before my birth! *hint hint* alibi) Ronald Reagan was shot. Not such a shocking piece of trivia until you know that my brother Scott was born on November 22nd, 1985... for non-history buffs... 23 years after JFK was assasinated! Tell me that isn't a little weird.





Sorry for the poor sync-up, but I feel it's worth it.

That's all from the new 24 year old for now.

A Time to Reflect

10 years ago... It was 1997

1.) How old were you?: Fourteen

2.) Where did you go to school?: JL Mitchener Public School

3.) Where did you work?: I babysat occasionally

4.) Where did you live? 23 King St, York

5.) Where did you hang out? There aren't really places to "hang out" in Cayuga

6.) Did you wear glasses? Nope

7.) Who was your best friend?: Chris Jaic

8.) How many tattoos did you have? Aside from some rub-ons nodda.

9.) How many piercings did you have? two

10.) What car did you drive?: Go-Kart

11.) Had you been to a real party yet? Unfortunately I had.

12.) Had your heart broken?: I think the more appropriate term is having your hormones broken.

13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Single and not bitter. One of the few times in my life that I was really quite content on my lonesome.

14.) Favourite band: No Doubt

15.) Favourite movie: The Rock


5 years ago... It was 2002

1.) How old were you?: 19

2.) Where did you go to school?: Cayuga Secondary School

3.) Where did you work?: Subway. This particular day as I recall >:(

4.) Where did you live?: Still York, later that year Peterborough.

5.) Where did you hang out?: Work and school

6.) Did you wear glasses? Still no

7.) Who was your best friend?: Sutor and Tammy

8.) Who was your regular-person crush?: I refuse to admit on the grounds that it is WAY too embaressing.

9.) How many tattoos did you have?: none.

10.) How many piercings did you have?: Same old, same old, though I had a fake nose ring I liked to wear on occasion.

11.) What car did you drive? I sort of gradually took over the Intrepid by placing my empty pizza boxes and gym clothes in the back seat and reprogramming the radio stations to 102.1 the Edge.

12.) Had you had your heart broken? At that age it's more like having your brain broken.

13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Single til the summer

14.) Favourite Band: The Dave Matthews Band (in fact I was just about to see them in concert for the first time as a B-Day present)

15.) Favourite movie: Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail

Presently

1.) How old are you?: 24 today :)

2.) Where do you work? Zellers and Signature Group Creative Marketing

3.) Where do you live? Sudbury, in my professor's house!

4.) Do you wear glasses?: Nope (PS: Andrew aren't you SUPPOSED to wear glasses?)

5. Who do you hang out with most? :P The Zellers staff, the Dooly's staff, Joe and Andrew.

6.) Do you talk to your old friends?: Zach and Yvonne for sure!

7.) How many piercings do you have?: My earring holes have grown over.

8.) How many tattoos?: I want a tattoo of a lizard crawling up my back.

9.) What kind of car do you drive? Sudbury transit is my ride.

10.) Has your heart been broken?: At this age you realize that the Tin Man was right. That's how you know you have one.

11.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Single, occasionally bitter :p

12.) Favourite band: Too many to chose from. At the moment I'm grooving on Arcade Fire, Bright Eyes and Feist.

13.) Favourite movie: Still a Python fan. Truthfully I am a huge sucker for Big Fish. It probably has my all-time favourite half hour of movie-making in the history of cinema (from him arriving at the circus, through to him arriving home from the war).

Her favourite flowers are daffodils

Don't forget to support that Canadian Cancer Society, this week (and I think next) they are selling daffodils!

Because one can never have too many...

Oh Geez

You have a mission. It is to go to the Rainbow Showcase Theatre and see the movie Fido. Not only is it the only thing worth watching at the movies right now (so far as I can tell) but I get the distinct feeling that it will not be at these cinemas for long. After all how can it compete with the likes of Norbit and Saw VIII?

It is satire at it's finest: both subtle and ridiculous (occasionally at the same time). It has all the makings of a cult classic. Possibly a cult of the living dead.




How else to describe it? It's like Dawn of the Dead meets Pleasantville, meets Bubba Ho-Tep encounters a cousin of The Stepford Wives and has a long distance relationship with Death Becomes Her.

What? I'm making observations about movies I've seen. I think it's healthy.

What am I doing?

Seriously. What am I doing with my life? If I get hit by a train tomorrow what will I have accomplished? Today I dealt with this woman complaining to me that at 80,000 HBC points for a $10 gift card at Zellers it "Isn't worht it". Isn't worth what? Pulling a card out of your damn wallet when you buy something? Shopping a huge cheap discount store and getting free crap for doing so? I mean I know it's made out to be more phenominal than it is, but the points are effing FREE people, what do you expect?! At 10 points you get a $50 gift card, congradulations we're out of business. Like what other place are you getting such sensational points from? Canadian Tire money? Airmiles?

You know what's "not worth it"? $8.25/hour to listen to you bitch about how your points aren't worth enough.



If I don't get into Grad school don't be surprised if my next production is "The Assasination and Persecution of Jean Paul Marat as performed by the inmates of the Assylum at Charenton under the direction of Liz Buchanan".

Lyrics for the day

Hey, I ain't never coming home
Hey, I'll just wander my own road
Hey, I can't meet you here tomorrow
Say goodbye don't follow

FREE ALCOHOL ON ST PATRICK'S DAY!

Now that I have your attention...

FREE ALCOHOL ON ST PATRICK'S DAY!


Seriously! On March 17th at the Algonquin Rd LCBO I am doing a tasting for the new Starbucks Cream and Coffee liquors. Come out and give them a try! I seriously don't care if you buy it or not, but I may need a little positive support as I attempt to sell a cream liquor on St Patty's day that isn't Baily's :S

Anyhow, come on out and see me at the Algonquin Rd liquor store on Saturday between 12:30 and 4:30 and get free booze and cookies.

And Liz Came Tumbling After

Yesterday I took a little tumble down my hill. I was always amazed that this didn't ever happen at Pearl St. I was rushing down the hill to get to the bus station in time for a quick Tim's break when I wiped out on some invisible ice. I went for a good two metre or so slide and knocked many numerous parts of my being around. I immediately got up and kept on going hoping that I wasn't hurt. After a short time I felt fine and rejoiced in my fabulous Wolverine-esque healing strength. It is possible that this was premature.

I woke up this morning and my whole body hurts. It's like I got run over by a train or something. I couldn't get a good picture of the bruise in the small of my back (chalk that up to a low megapixel digital camera and being too sore to twist my body around into good lighting). So here's my elbow bruise which was way cooler this morning:



I'm actually a big fan of bruises. I figure if it hurts you might as well have something to show for it.

Things I could watch if I got.... Satalite!

The music might be going down-hill, but a new career may be in the works...

Having said that I couldn't find an acting clip from the show that lasted long enough, so I went with the cool piano scene with Hugh Laurie:

"Continual fear and danger of violent death and the life of man: solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short"- Hobbes

Self Expression

When we do a good job at Zellers they reward us with what are called "Speeding Tickets" for providing "fast and friendly" customer service. When we collect enough of these we get to pick a pin to decorate our uniform.

That's right...



we get FLAIR!

In other news I MIGHT be able to quit Jade. I started getting some LCBO shifts again... fingers crossed!

A Typical Evening in Customer Service

The scene- there is a sale on Folgers Coffee, and naturally after a few days we have run out...

Customer: Where's the coffee?
Me: We ran out pretty quickly the sale started a few days ago. I can write you a rain-cheque if you like.
Customer (indignantly): Well, how long is that going to take?
Me: I really can't say. Usually we keep stuff like that stocked so maybe a week. We can have them call you when it comes in-
Customer: -That isn't going to get me a cup of coffee tomorrow morning, is it?

FREEZE!!

What I said:

"No I'm sorry, but there are other brands in the store, or you may be able to locate it at the Supermarket here in the mall"

What I PROBABLY could've gotten away with saying but didn't have the guts to:

"Here's a buck twenty-five, get yourself some damn Tim Hortons"

What I wanted to say drenched in sarcasm:

"Oh I'm sorry, you need the coffee TOMORROW? In that case I'll go to the back and grind some beans! If you need cream I can stop by the dairy farm on the way back."


ANYWAYS!

I got most of this out of my system at Dooly's this evening, bless Jenny and Steph's patient souls, but today was the sort of day when there was no right side of the bed to begin with.

I worked both at the Jade and Zellers back to back, which is usually not as bad when Zellers is the second. However despite my genius plan to avoid forgetting my uniform for the second job by packing it my back-pack the night before I managed to foil myself by getting half way downtown and realizing that I didn't have my back-pack on. So I missed the 9:45 Paris LoEllen (because let's face it if you don't arrive at the Sudbury transit terminal 45 minutes before work starts, then you shouldn't expect to get there on time), but came up with an alternate plan. I would ride Regent University at 10, get off on Paris street and run up Paris street to the Four Corners. For those with no knowledge of Sudbury geography, it's a good hike. This actually worked relatively well until I ran through a huge freezing puddle and DRENCHED my feet throroughly. I would have spent nearly 12 hours working on my feet in soaking wet socks and shoes, had I not come up with the unsurpassably ridiculous plan of wearing my mittens on my feet all day.
The Jade was the usual Jade. I got reprimanded for doing stupid things like offering to cut up a customer's brithday cake and serve it at their table. This apparently qualifies as a "waste of time" because the customer can cut their own cake. I should be spending my time doing more valuable things like chopping cabbage until it is razor thin ("No, no finer finer!"), because if there's one thing that will keep people coming to the Jade for special occasions with large groups it's imperfect cole-slaw.
Things did not get much better at Zellers.
It seems like everytime I get a nice Manager, idiot employees take advantage of them and treat them like crap until they break them. I had been noticing for a few days that my really super nice manager at Zellers seemed strung-out. Staff have been stealing, back-stabbing, faking sick to get out of work and bitching about the job non-stop. The big Z brought in a new Customer Service Manager to straighten things out (this could be a story in and of itself). The boss I like (the Store Manager) looked deflated and tired. I was saddened by this and had worked up some courage to ask him if I could help out in anyway (despite feeling that I was stepping over my boundaries) tonight. I got in and found out that he quit yesterday because he just couldn't take it anymore.
I hope that the change will help him and that he will have success elsewhere. I don't know him that well, but he seems like a really nice guy and he took the time each shift I was there to tell me that I was doing a good job and to thank me for helping out with extra stuff.
The entire thing leaves me with a pretty unpleasant feeling about the store and the atmosphere is getting really intense. While it's nowhere near as bad as the restaurant, at least at the Jade the customers are usually nice.
I think I need a hug from Zeddy the Teddy.

That's enough for now. Time to get some rest so that I can start a fresh new day of being yelled at by jerks! Being a 20-something rocks!

"I know what I'm getting for my next Laptop!"

Having minimal production values and simple concept in a commercial=1000000 youtube parodies. I feel, however, that this one is note-worthy:




Notes:

1) I had three titles chosen. This was the most mature.

2) If anyone finds this offensive, please see the following disclaimer

Mi

I realized tonight that I am actually off both jobs tomorrow. I also realized that this saddens me. I am giving anyone who actually still reads this a mission: help me find a reason to get out of bed tomorrow. There's a reasonable chance I won't otherwise.

Employee of the Month

My big fat Greek boss at the Cardinal once said that my accent was "Pompous", but then ran and grabbed his English phrase book when I gave him a funny look.

Once my Camp Director at Lakewood finished my summer performance review with "But I'm still glad you were on staff this summer."

Let's face it, bosses say stupid things sometimes.

But yesterday oh yesterday.


I was faint at work a few days ago and yesterday my boss at the Jade Garden asked me if I had gone to see the doctor. I explained that I was on some meds that occassionally make me very dizzy and that I was going to see the doctor in a few weeks anyways. She asked me what the meds were for and I declined to comment, which I think is perfectly fair, but she followed up with "Are they affecting your head?" I took this to mean "Do you get headaches?". I said "Yes sometimes" she responded, "Yes you see I notice. I see you are nice person... like I think you are good person, but it seems like there is something wrong with your head."

I seriously hope nothing ever tops that.

We don't want no Mac and Cheese! Hey Dalton- reduce the fees!

I think LU would run much more effectively if every Board of Governors meeting happened like this:



*stolen from The Northern Life

Advice to live your life

So you want to have the best Valentines Day possible? Well here are the three ways you can increase your Valentines Day pleasure. Accoring to University educated Symbologist Liz Buchanan the best way to have the best Valentines Day is to

ONE: Hit John Tesh very hard with a large blunt object. If there are no blunt objects available try a good old fashion punch to the face. He will not strike first as he is only capable of punching the first verb in every sentence.

TWO: When he regains consciousness explain to him (and Dr. Phil should time permit) that not every problem can be solved with a sound-bite intended for small child.

THREE: If that doesn't work try hitting him with the large blunt object again. Redundancy is very important on the John Tesh radio show, and saying the same thing over again in a slightly different way is key to patronizing listeners.

So to summarize: large blunt object, a good talking to and repeat large blunt object. This is 100% guarunteed to help you live a long life and impress your co-workers. Just tell them you heard it here, on Liz Buchanan's blog. The most credible source for pulling random thoughts out of my ass and holding them up on a pedestal as a way to live your life.

"One oh five point three... one oh five point three..."

Breaking News: The Second Coming!

You might call it tabloid reporting, but I am positive that this picture proves once and for all, what rock critics have been saying all along...








Get behind me Satan!

Sentenced to finish this quiz...

because what else would I do with my day off?

1. I've come to realize that my ex is... one of the only people reading this

2. I am listening to... my computer humming

3. I talk … constantly

4. I love… theatre. Sometimes I think that it does not love me back.

5. My best friends... are all moving to France.

7. I lost... "it". I swear I once had it.

8. I hate it when people... wake me up purring at 6:30AM and then pee on the carpet anyways later in the afternoon- oh wait that's cats.

9. Love is... not love which alters when it alteration finds... (finish that and win 10000 Liz points)

10. Marriage is… defined as a union between a man and a woman, a man and a man, a woman and a woman or a conservative and their ignorance.

11. Somewhere, someone is thinking... I'm sure I can lick my elbow if I try hard enough.

12. I'll always be... short!

13. I have a crush on... my boyfriend: Ewan McGreggor

14. The last time I cried was because... my tear ducts realeased liquid.

15. My cell phone… is actually making my life a lot easier.

16. When I wake up in the morning... I try to convince myself there's a reason to get out of bed.

17. Before I go to sleep at night... I spend numerous hours rolling around (I'm battling a little insomnia at the moment)

18. Right now I am thinking about... not having to work tonight. It's making me happy.

19. Babies are... little miracles. Scientifically explicable, completely common, generally unsurprising miracles.

20. I get on myspace... and then remember that I don't have a myspace account.

21. Today I... went to the school to do a bunch of paper work/picking up stuff/making appointments.

22. Tonight I will... watch a movie perhaps.

23. Soon I will... eat.

24. I really want... nothing at all. I think that happens at the other end of inner-peace spectrum as well.

25. The person who is most likely to repost this... Andrew but he will probably steal it from someone else's site. And it will probably take a few days.

Sleep will come soon...

Hello all...

I do still exist. To many, my apologies for not being able to take part in the day of action as I was starting a new job (#3, although this is the first one with any reliability!) and to others simply apologies if I was supposed to remember to do something for you or call you or something. I suck. And I don't sleep anymore. Seriously I get like 2 hours a night. I have this combination of working everyday and insomnia. I think I might be going totally insane. At least I am no longer embaressingly poor! Soon I will even have my bills caught up.

My new job you ask? I'm working at Zellers. It's actually really great. The training program is excellent and they treat you like a real human being coming to work for them. I am starting to get the hang of the cash, and once I do it should get a lot easier from here on out.

And now, senseless violence:

"Oh Good"

I'm sorry. The angry rant is gone now.

Yipes. Needless drama.


Um SPEAKING OF WHICH

You will not believe what I just came across:



Sweet Jesus. The Mooninites are attacking!

"Earthling and your puny 3 dimensions"

Up and down and all around

Tonight is another low one.

My new job is sketchy to say the least. The Buffet that I serve at... which we will call the "Green Flower Bed Buffet" is a health and safety nightmare. The kitchen is digsgusting (food sitting everywhere on surfaces I don't think have been washed... ever, fat and grease caked on to every surface, boxes and garbage and dirty dishes piled everywhere all the time, etc) It's seriously frightening.
This combined with a sexist hiring policy (only women can be servers) has posed a serious ethical dilema. I can do one of three things: 1) Proceed as I am currently, 2) Complain to the manager, 3) Quit.

Truthfully I will probably do #1. Besides being totally spineless I am also REALLY enjoying the tips that I make at lunch. Even if it's because I'm busting my butt as the only server for the entire rush time.

At any rate. Now I've gotten to vent so I don't feel quite so bad. Perhaps some food will improve my overall well-being. Off I go!

Sign of the Bull

I get one of those Daily Horoscope things on my homepage. Most days I just roll my eyes, but today was blog-worthy:

"If you've been thinking about starting a garden, this is a great day to do it, as anything relating to the land begun today is likely to thrive. Doubts about your financial security might be on your mind, dear Aries. They're probably misplaced, as you should continue to do well. However, your doubts can serve a purpose in that they could inspire you to take steps to ensure that your situation continues. Go to it!"

I can't even begin...

The War Against Microwave Ovens

Energy restored!

Please keep checking now and then. I will eventually post something new when I have some energy.

How Bill Sanders saved my life

Firstly: I am on an LU French keyboard so I apologize for the MLAish Formal Essay writing style of this post as I cannot use contractions.

I have been working at the LU Bookstore of late (more on this subject later) and after work yesterday I made a mad dash to the Acting for the Camera class at Thorneloe. Why? Long story. A clue: I thought that the activity of the day would be watching the movie that was made at the end of last year, however the class was doing something else.
Bill invited me to join in as each student got in front of the camera, and with the lense inches from our face he proceeded to tell us all what he saw. In particular whether a casting director would give us the time of day.
It was too late to run.

I have long been informed that I am not a female romantic lead. I do not pretend that I am (though I have let myself get crushed by this the odd time). It is difficult to accept when one has a passion to act that she will always be type cast as mean teachers, drunks and assistant directors because she is a ¨character actor¨. As Bill so eloquently noted ¨See Steve Buchsemi will not play a male romantic lead, because he is an ugly motherfucker¨. Sigh.

In classic Liz-defensive style I tried to avoid going in front of the camera and on my way up I made cracks about how Bill was going to break my heart by telling me I would never be a Juliet. I got in front of the camera and Bill said ¨Wow Liz, I am surprised, you can TOTALLY be a female romantic lead.¨

And I thought: ¨WHY DID I NOT TAKE THIS CLASS THREE YEARS AGO?!¨ You know when I still had a shred of self-confidence to build on? Hm, perhaps that would have been more like ten years ago.


ANYWAYS!

It is probably a good thing that the bookstore job is only temporary. I really do not belong there:

Student: I am looking for American Popular Music for Music in Pop II
Me: Oh god, you DO NOT need to buy that book. He just lectures straight from the text every class and it is stupidly easy.

Student: This text book is expensive, but I really want a fun elective this semester.
Me: You should take Theatre Movement. It is super fun and there is no text!

Student: Holy crap, $260 for Quantum Physics!
Me: Yeah, but if you had a PhD in Quantum Physics, would you want to charge people $260 for your brilliance?

Good looking male student: Hey your name is Liz right? We met on the bus!
Me: Heh, uh.. yeah... me... yes... me Liz.


Plus I wander around the store during down-time and read text books. Because I am a NERD.

Oh sure, but can they sing and play insturments while they're doing it?

Revenge of the Who (Liz's Holiday)

Like any year Christmas came much the same way,
but Liz's landlord's heart didn't grow one size that day.
Liz left her apartment, notice in hand,
but before she departed she had a plan.

She taped up some signs warning those who might rent
to be weary of hazards before their money was spent.
The broken TV and oven and chair
the path that's not lit where you easily trip on the stair.

And before she departed she poured down the sink
some two week old milk that had started to stink.
As her final remark to her landlords of past:
Hope your Christmas was Merry, but you can both kiss my ass.

Some how or other it came just the same...

Christmas 2006

This month did not start with much Christmas festivity. Perhaps better than SOME Decembers in the past, but certainly a little humbuggish.

However within a few days of being back with the Buchanan clan, I am ho-ho-hoing again.

The season started with some of our long-standing traditions: I rearranged all of the decorations on the tree in the usual way that I conujur up concerns of an obessive compulsive disorder linked to evenly spaced ornaments, my Grandmother from the states called my father while cooking the "Buchanan Family Traditional Raselberry Pudding" to get the recipe, and of course we rearranged my mother's little snowmen:

Apparently we're "making" her crazy. She was in slightly better mental health at the Christmas Eve service where our church has started reading the King James version of Luke 2:1-15 ("on Earth peace, goodwill to man" because THAT'S what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown).

Other traditions include my brother and I exchanging presents before the midnight service:









and waiting at the top of the stairs for Dad to take a picture of us coming down the stairs on Christmas morning. Note my brother's enthusiasm at me waking him up at 8am:

(apologies for the orientation, it's taking forever to load images)

Scott's enthusiasm however has nothing on Mog's enthusiasm:

A few traditions went by the way side for us this year. I had been sad originally about some of these (family dinner, not putting my decorations up, no Christmas cookies) BUT something else proved far more exciting and memorable for this Christmas:

MY AUNTIE BRENDA AND BRIAN ARE GETTING MARRIED!

It was a surprise to many, but my Grandma and I knew better :)

I guess it was us three living together this summer, we saw it coming. Anyways, I am very happy for them, as they are both very cool people.

Not to be out-done ;) my parents renewed their vows for their 25th Wedding Anniversary:

Congradulations Mom on getting into your wedding gown. They both look awesome!

The ceremony took place tonight, and they are off to Mexico to enjoy their second Honeymoon.

So that was Christmas 2006. A nice surprise if I do say so myself.

And now I leave you with what will potentiall be next year's card, or my album cover:

Mariah has NOTHING on me.

It hasn't snowed a single flurry, Fozzie we're all in a hurry!

I'm heading home in 3 hours :)
Have a Merry Christmas all! Lots of love to you and yours, and peace on earth goodwill to man.

Blue Christmas

How this December feels as told by the Fraggles at their Winter Solstice Festival of the Bells:

MOKEY: We should do something to try to keep our spirits up.
WEMBLEY: How about a postcard from Gobo's Uncle Travelling Matt?
RED: Stand by spirits going down!

**********

It looks like my luck is about to change! How do I know? A pigeon crapped on my shoulder today. The grosser the dropping the better the luck right?


**********

Huh, didn't see that one coming.

I can't help but feel I've abused this power.

A Public Service Announcement

The latest cartoon on The Perry Bible Fellowship, while seemingly amusing is actually addressing a serious medical condition. Tetris Cerebrus, or Tetris Brain, occurs when the mind has been playing Tetris non-stop for extended periods of time (generally in the absense of work or study) and begins to sort everything as such. They begin stacking things in their mind and planning out strategies for particularly difficult Tetris scenerios in their sleep. The symptoms generally clear up after a few days of self-control:

How the Grinch stole my heat

Liz lived in Sudbury and liked Christmas a lot.
But her landlords, who lived south of Sudbury did not.
Her landlords turned off the heat in the cold Christmas season,
now please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason.
It could be perhaps that their funds were too tight,
Or perhaps that their heads weren't screwed on just right.

But I think that the most likely reason of all, may have been that their hearts were two sizes too small.

Waiting for Godot

************
Oops. Godot came while I was Dooly's

************

I am waiting for a phone call, and in the meantime I have stolen an activity from the Rootman:

1)Joe
2)Andrew
3)Angelo
4)Luke
5)Laura
6)Xander
7)Lizzie V
8)Erica
9)Michael Hooper
10)Natalie
11)Scott
12)Genevieve

Q: Have you ever kissed number 7 (Lizzie V)?
A: We must have. I am certain of it. But just to be sure I will kiss her the next time I see her.

Q: What's the best memory you have of 9(Michael Hooper)?
A: Well basically I have two to chose from, last New Years Eve and "Get in the duct hatchet face!". I'll go with MST3K

Q: When's the next time you're gonna see 4(Luke)?
A. Hopefully Saturday night?

Q: Is number 8 (Erica) pretty?
A: Downright beautiful!

Q: What was your first impression of number 10 (Natalie)?
A: "Oh hey you're Natty-pants, I'm the Tizzer!"

Q: How did you meet 3 (Angelo)?
A: I want to say Erica's party two summers ago, though we kind of met by extension of the blogging community I believe.

Q: Is 11 (Scott) your best friend?
A: Actually yeah.

Q: Have you seen 5 (Laura) in the last month?
A: Yep, at the MacBeth opening and Tartuffe auditions.

Q: Do you think 2 (Andrew) has a crush on you?
A: (my best recollection of the subtitles) "No, you owe me an explanation! First you fall into my arms out of the sky, then when I show up at your school to do an inspection there you are! You are even in my dreams, you must really have a crush on me" -Life is Beautiful (kind of)

Q: When was the last time you saw 12 (Genevieve)?
A: I believe it was at a party of Erica's for her birthday sometime ago.

Q: Have you ever been to 1's (Joe's) house?
A: Once or twice

Q: Would you ever kiss 6 (Xander)?
A: Only because I was specifically directed to do so :P

Q: When's the next time you'll see 10 (Natalie)?
A: Good question. Perhaps I'll eventually make it out to Australia!

Q: Are you really close to 3 (Angelo)?
A: Not REALLY, but he's seen me on the verge of a mental collapse. Actually so have most people I know, so I don't know if that qualifies. Sorry Angelo.

Q: Have you ever been to the movies with 4 (Luke)?
A: Actually... I don't think we have! That's craziness.

Q: Have you ever gotten in trouble with 2 (Andrew)?
A: We did think we were getting in trouble once. We probably SHOULD have gotten in a lot more trouble in Shakespeare than we did.

Q: Would you ever go out with number 7 (Lizzie V)?
A: Especially when she's a rich doctor! She's buying!

Q: What do you and number 3 (Angelo) talk about the most?
A: I guess movies and the stress of applying to grad school.

Q: Do you even know 9 (Michael Hooper)?
A: I suppose not very well. Particularly given the fact that I know him by extension of others and still refer to him by his full name.

Q: Would you give number 3 (Angelo) a hug?
A: What are we in grade four? In any case I got my cootie shot back then.

Q: Would you ever go on a date with number 10 (Natalie)?
A: Sorry Natalie, I don't swing that way. I could never date an English major :p

Q: Are you in love with number 12 (Genevieve)?
A: I can't say that I am. But then I've never been very good at telling that.

Q: Have you ever lied to number 6 (Xander)?
A: Well I did tell him I would get him a copy of that video and didn't get around to it. Doh!

Q: Do you know a secret about number 8 (Erica)?
A: I'd take it to the grave if I did.

Q: Describe the relationship between number 9 (Michael Hooper) and number 5 (Laura).
A: Uhhh... the both have commented on my blog?

Q: What is the best thing about your friendship with number 4 (Luke)?
A: The random open mouth kissing.

Q: Have you ever danced with number 7 (Lizzie V)?
A: As a matter a fact we did in a play to some trippy music.

Q: How long have you known number 12 (Genevieve)?
A: I guess a little over a year.

Q: Have you ever been in a fight with number 8 (Erica)?
A: Well if she had just admitted that she loved Aminta in the first place he wouldn't have thrown himself off a cliff!

Q: Does number 9 (Michael Hooper) have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
A: No idea.

Q: Have you ever been a coworker with number 2 (Andrew)?
A: Being the same number on each other's questionaires doesn't make this very interesting. I'll make something up- "Actually we were both stationed together in the gulf. Andrew took a bullet in a gun battle for me and I pulled him from the flaming wreck when his jeep hit a land-mine. We've been friends ever since."

Q: Have you ever wanted to punch number 6 (Xander) in the face?
A: Xander, if you still read my blog, surely you can appreciate why the answer is "yes". Let's face it. We all wanted to hit everyone all the time.

Q: Has number 1 (Joe) ever met your mother?
A: Yes. Within ten minutes she had told a story about our old dog having diahhrea. She always does that.

Q. How did you meet number 6 (Xander)?
A: It was a comedy of errors. I mistook him for a man I mistook for my husband.

Q: Did you ever accidentally physically hurt number 5 (Laura)?
A: I made her do some very uncomfortable exercises to warm up for a show. But that's just because she was fooling around ;)

Q: What is the best memory you have with number 12 (Genevieve)?
A: We don't really have any. Soon perhaps!

Q: Do you live close to 7 (Lizzie V)?
A: Fairly. Maybe about 30 minutes

Q: What is number 2's (Andrew) favorite food?
A: Sheppherd's Pie :)

Q: Out of your top 12, which one would you say is the funniest?
A: Tie- Joe/Andrew

Q: Who is the most flirtatious?
A: Luke can really turn on the charm.

Q: If you could change one thing about number 10 (Natalie), what would it be?
A: Not a darn thing. She seems pretty swell the way she is.

Q: Say something nice about number 11 (Scott).
A: Aw Mom! Fine... he... doesn't really suck...

Q: Which one lives the farthest away?
A: Natalie is on the other side of the planet

Q: Which one do you hang out with the most?
A: Andrew.

Q: Who is the loudest?
A: Xander. That's why our marriage worked so well.

Q: The quietest?
A: Scott. 90% me, 10% awkward silence.

Q: What kind of car does number 12 (Genevieve) have?
A: No idea

Q: Have you traveled anywhere with number 11 (Scott)?
A: Why yes. We've been to New York State, Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia, Ottawa, New York City, Washington DC and Florida.

Q: If you gave number 5 (Laura) $100 dollars tonight, what would they spend it on?
A: I hope something very nice for herself, but I bet she'd buy nice Chirstmas presents for her friends and family.

Christmas brings out the child in us all

I don't pretend to have a very mature sense of humour, but I think this is a new low.

I was in line at the dollar store and something odd caught my eye. There were these sucker/lollypop Christmas things next to the cash registar, but one of them was broken:










To be fair, even if Santa's hand wasn't broken off, Rudolph's face definitely implies that something very not right is going on.

The movie of my life (as written by my WMplayer)

Opening Credits:------------- Mr Brightside-The Killers (seems like the kind of music that would start a film, but what does it say about me?!)

Waking Up:-------------------- Bitches Brew-Miles Davis (this is my new official nickname for my daily coffee fix)

First Day At School: --------- 2+2=5-Radiohead (Well what do you expect? It's only my first day.)

Falling In Love: -------------- Foxy Lady-Jimi Hendrix (Apparently with a real hot Mama! Or as I often expect, Jimi Hendrix)

Breaking Up:------------------ Subterranean Homesick Blues-Bob Dylan (Um... AHA! It's a lack of clear communication in the relationship.

Prom:-------------------------- School Night-Ani DiFranco (Yes well.)

Dance Sequence:------------ This Must Be the Place-The Arcade Fire (covering the Talking Heads) (Strangely I can actually picture this working as a dance sequence in a movie: it starts off kind of slowly, some people start catching on, a few sing...)

Life's OK:---------------------- Caring Is Creepy-The Shins (Brilliant. Only when I stop caring will life be OK)

Breakdown:------------------- I Hope That I Don't Fall In Love With You-Tom Waits (Wow, this is a whole new level of love-related cynicism)

Driving:------------------------ Those To Come-The Shins (Driving very slowly, at night as stars appear)

Flashback:--------------------- Crash Into Me (live)-Dave Matthews Band (Probably a flashback of me stalking Dave Matthews)

Getting Back Together:------ Coin Operated Boy-The Dresden Dolls ("my sad picture of girl getting bitter")

Wedding:---------------------- Not About Love-Fiona Apple (I hope I'm at least marrying for money)

Sex Scene:-------------------- Waiting for a Superman-Iron and Wine (covering The Flaming Lips) ("Is it getting heavy?")

Birth of Child:----------------- Don't Panic-Coldplay (Easy for you to say!)

Final Battle:------------------- I'll Believe in Anything-Wolf Parade (Oh I'm definitely winning this battle!)

Death Scene:----------------- I Am Over It-The Dandy Warhols (By "it" I mean "life", I mean that was SO yesterday)

Funeral Song:---------------- Tangled Up in Blue-Ani DiFranco and the Indigo Girls (live, covering Bob Dylan) (Please do play this at my funeral actually. That would be excellent)

End Credits:------------------ One Chance-Modest Mouse (I couldn't make this up)

Hippy Holidays

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Funny story: When I first put this link up for my post the report was different. It was titled something like "Canada defends Same-sex marriage law" and was about the MPs defeating Prime Minister Harper's motion on reopening the Same-Sex marriage debate. The link now leads to a story about Stephen Harper declaring that he will not reopen the issue. Had it read that way initially I wouldn't have given it a "Go Canada" title, but a "Take that you dumb-ass Albertan Neo-Con" title.


In the News: Go Canada!

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May I also present a "White House Christmas Card" to further my position left of centre:

Wii

Thanks to Joe for this.

And for telling me that one can't leave comments on my Live Space. I'll come back here :)

Also, two T-shirts I will buy when I get my $10million dollar movie contract:

"Who the hell can see forever anyway?"

Lyrics for the night

Please, remember me
Fondly
I heard from someone you're still pretty
And then
They went on to say
That the pearly gates
Had some eloquent graffiti
Like 'We'll meet again'
And 'Fuck the man'
And 'Tell my mother not to worry'