Wednesday, August 16, 2006

How George Lucas stole Christmas

I can only actually reccommend this activity if you have absolutely NOTHING better to do with your time:

The Star Wars Holiday Special Part 1

It comes courtesy of Joe. IMDB trivia from the special:

"* George Lucas famously attempted (and failed) to buy up all master copies of this special to ensure it was never broadcast again.

* This special has never been released on video; however, bootleg home-recorded videos have been circulating for years and are now all over the internet. George Lucas once remarked at an Australian convention that "if I had the time and a sledgehammer, I would track down every bootlegged copy of that program and smash it."

* At least a small portion of the special is considered to be official Star Wars canon. Boba Fett (who is introduced in one of the Special's vignettes), of course, went on to play an important role in Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) and Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (1983). Also the Wookiee planet of Kashyyyk was featured in Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005).

* WILLHELM SCREAM: This, like every other incarnation of Star Wars, contains a Wilhelm Scream. We hear the scream in question when a storm trooper gets shot off of a balcony by Han Solo in Chewbacca's home."
-IMDB


3 other Reasons it's actually worth watching (at least a little bit, or as much as you can tolerate):

1) The befuddled old man (Art Carney) is obviously a proto-type for Jar Jar Binks
2) Aparently a long time ago in a galaxy far far away people listened to Jefferson Starship
3) The cooking show... um yeah.

Monday, August 14, 2006

"Mmmm pig in a cage" (title by Scott Buchanan)

I got a couple of things accomplished today. It might not seem very impressive, but I'm actually quite pleased. I finally made a list of all of the theatre companies I want to send headshots and resumes to, and a list of the acting schools I would like to attend to "hone my skill" if you will. I also got a few telephone numbers for places where I can get headshots done.

PS: If you didn't see my newest link, do check out Rodeohead. It's like a pig in a cage on antibiotics. Yeehaw.

Friday, August 11, 2006

For more on the subject of rocking out really hard:

Also check out this article from the TO Star about the festival.

Whose idea was it to start shouting that anyways?

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Preamble

It took me WAY too many tries to get the original post for this right, so I'm not going back in to insert this stuff. Let's call it part the first:

Lollapalooza

starring...

Jenny



Stephie and Justin



Andrew




myself (courtesy of This Old Shack)



The Chevy Uplander



and Bunk-mates

The Best Place in the World to be...

A McDonald's in Indiana


The Subway from the O'Hare Airport




The Monroe Subway platform



Meeting Sam Beam



Front Row or Nearly Front Row for Iron and Wine, Calexico, The Dresden Dolls, The Shins and others





Camped out to get those amazing spots



Chicago



The I-94



Coloma



Woodstock



Lollapalooza

Lollapaloozer

I will post about the big weekend soon (stupid lack-of-digital camera), in the meantime please check out The Old Shack for an excllent and thorough telling of the Adventures of Liz, Andrew, Jenny, Justin and Steph in Chicago.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

In my duffle bag:

2 T-shirts (one depicting Cookie Monster, the other Betty)
2 polo shirts (striped)
2 pairs of khaki shorts
1 recently purchased skirt ($13 w00t!)
2 tank tops
1 tube top
6 pairs of underwear
3 bras
1 pair socks
2 Venus razors
1 camera
3 rolls of film
SPF 15 Coppertone Sunblock
1 Off Bug Spray Sport
1 new Epipen (no longer carrying one that has been expired for 2 years)
3 mix CDs
$$$ undisclosed American money
undisclosed quantity of food not to be declared at American border
1 pair of PJs
1 Annie Doll
3-day Pass for Lollapalooza

=5 days in Chicago!

Just 8.5 more hours of work and I'm in the clear!

Friday, July 28, 2006

Time Well Spent

Nissah has drawn to my attention a new website called Overheard in New York

At first I thought that a lot of these had to be made up, but it occurred to me that I have in my life overheard equally stupid conversations on busses, at bus stops, in the mall and been in equally stupid conversations with others.

Enjoy!

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Unhappy (in fact Melancholic) 404th Birthday

Thought I would share an article I found at Book TV.



Hamlet -- Borrowed, Crawled and Pythoned

by Steve King

print tell a friend comment


On this day in 1602, printer James Robertes entered in the Stationers' Register, "A booke called the Revenge of Hamlett Prince Denmarke as yt was latelie Acted by the Lord Chamberleyne his servants." Shakespeare seems to have written Hamlet about 1600; more certain is that two of the Chamberlain's Men in the original cast at the Globe playhouse were Richard Burbage, as Hamlet, and Shakespeare, probably as the Ghost and perhaps as Claudius, too -- a casting economy which might have given Gertrude a start.

James Robertes was practicing standard thievery for these pre-copyright times, but Shakespeare too had borrowed. As well as various mythic sources, an 11th-12th century Danish saga entitled "Amleth" tells the tale of Feng murdering his brother, Horwendil in order to marry Gerutha, his sister-in-law; causing son Amleth to pretend to be mad in order to save himself; causing the suspicious Feng to set woman- and spy-traps for young Amleth; causing Amleth to be sent to England guarded by two no-goods carrying an execution letter, which Amleth will alter to have, as Shakespeare puts it, "the engineer hoist with his own petard."

Apart from the complexity and depth, Shakespeare's unique additions include the play-within-the-play device. Stage historian John Mills (Hamlet on Stage: The Great Tradition, 1985) documents over a century of lead actors who borrowed the stage business of "Hamlet's Crawl" for this scene. Starting with Edmund Kean in 1814, Hamlet would slither and squint towards Claudius, jumping up when the guilty conscience was "frighted with false fire." The first-night reviewer for the London Herald was appalled:

During the mimic representation, Mr. Kean so far forgot that inalienable delicacy, which should eternally characterize a gentleman in his deportment before the ladies, that he not only exposed his derriere to his mistress, but positively crawled upon his belly towards the King like a wounded snake in a meadow....

A different sort of tradition is documented on the web site barbarapaul.com, devoted to listing all the book titles that contain an allusion to Hamlet. There are over 150 titles currently listed for the "To be, or not to be" soliloquy alone -- To be/Not be (24), Undiscovered Country (22), Outrageous Fortune (18), Perchance to Dream (16), No Traveler Returns (11), as many Slings and Arrows... all the way down to one To Take Arms (subtitled, 'A Year in the Provisional IRA'). Also included on the site is this anagram of the first three lines of the soliloquy: "In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero, Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten."

There are almost as many Hamlet parodies, the one following owing a lot to Monty Python's Dead Parrot:

Hamlet Alas, poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio, a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. He hath bore me on his back a thousand times. I cannot believe he is dead. Tell me, good sir, what is wrong with my friend Yorick?

Digger I'll tell you what's wrong with him, my Lord. He's dead, that's what's wrong with him.

Hamlet No, no, he's resting. Look you upon those lips that I have kissed.

Digger My Lord, I know a dead jester when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

Hamlet No, he is not dead. He is merely resting.

Digger Resting?

Hamlet Yes, a remarkable fellow, Yorick. Beautiful skin tone.

Digger His skin tone don't enter into it - he's stone dead.

This goes on for a bit (available at saifai.co.uk), until the Gravedigger makes a near-fatal mistake:

Digger He's not pining, he's passed on. This jester is no more. He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker. This is a late jester. He's a stiff. Bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't wrenched him from the earth, he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-jester! He cannot speak, and he cannot be!

Hamlet To be or not to be...

Digger God, not a soliloquy! I have work to do.

Hamlet Right then, wrap him up. I'll take him with me. Yorick loves a good ride.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Lyrics for the Night Shift

I don't know what I'm doing, don't know should I
Change my mind, I can't decide, there's too many
Variations to consider
No thing I do don't do no thing but bring me
More to do, It's true, I do imbue my blue unto myself,
I make it bitter


Fiona Apple's When the Pawn... I think might be my life from about 2003-the present.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Tales from the Niagara Penninsula


(courtesy of My Pictures folder at Keefer Mansion Inn)

Sigh. Until this point I had resisted the urge to msn at work. It's on the computer, but I've been trying really hard to behave myself. Here's the dinger. I have three overnights this week and I am not exaggerating in the least when I say that it is 12:05 (an hour into the first of them) and I have NOTHING left to do. I really hope they leave me something tomorrow night. The place has been so slow that there is no cleaning to catch up on, nothing to enter into the databases, and no work left to do. In the next 7 and a half hours the only thing I have to do is dust the chairs in the dining room and windex the windows (preferably closer to the morning) and set up for breakfast. Once an hour I'm supposed to patrol the hallways and make sure there aren't any burglars or ghosts. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do if I find either a burglar or ghost (aside from allerting Scooby Doo and the gang), but at least it keeps me up and moving (and awake).

Today I found out that I am a huge gigantic wuss. More so than originally suspected.
I went in to have a consult done on Lazer Hair Removal. Apparently my hair growth is so freaky that not only are salon-based estheticians freaked out, but even estheticians who deal with frequent electrolosis patients and lazers are baffled. I am indeed circus material folks. Anyways to add insult to injury, I didn't faint getting treatment done -oh no- I fainted getting the treatment DESCRIBED to me. You would think that someone who is capable of having hair ripped out of the side of their face with wax strips wouldn't be so afraid of a little needle sensation, but there you have it. The esthetician also informed me that the lazer treatment would improve my self-confidence. From this statement I can conclude that the lazer not only removes hair, but gets rid of acne scarring, burns 30lbs and adds 3 inches in height.

At any rate, the play is coming along, and should be ready for Thursday. Meanwhile I get to log a few more hours here... doing nothing. Seriously, come visit me online. I'll be around until like 4AM when I go to clean.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

July 8th in History

Some important events:
1099 - First Crusade: 15,000 starving Christian soldiers march in religious procession around Jerusalem as its Muslim defenders mock them.
1775 - The Olive Branch Petition is adopted by the Continental Congress of the Thirteen Colonies.
1776 - The Liberty Bell was rung to summon citizens of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania for the reading of the Declaration of Independence by the Continental Congress.
1889 - The first issue of the Wall Street Journal is published.
1896 - William Jennings Bryan delivers his Cross of Gold speech advocating bimetalism at the 1896 Democratic National Convention in Chicago.
1947 - Reports are broadcast that a UFO has crash landed in Roswell, New Mexico.
1969 - IBM CICS is made generally available for the 360 mainframe computer.

Some Important Births:
1838 - Ferdinand Graf von Zeppelin, German inventor (d. 1917)
1839 - John D. Rockefeller, American businessman and philanthropist (d. 1937)
1908 - Nelson A. Rockefeller, 41st Vice President of the United States (d. 1979)
1926 - Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, Swiss-born psychiatrist (d. 2004)
1951 - Anjelica Huston, American actress
1958 - Kevin Bacon, American actor
1961 - Toby Keith, American singer
1968 - Billy Crudup, American actor
1970 - Beck, American singer

A Few Holidays and observances:
Feast day of Saint Grimbald
Feast day of Saint Kilian
Annual Soapy Smith wake, held each year in Skagway, Alaska in the Gold Rush Cemetery and in Hollywood, California at the Magic Castle

The most important Event/Holiday and Birth:

1982- Jenny Hazelton is born!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

What you don't get online is the picture of me right next to the picture of Johnny Depp

For the full story go to The St Catharines Standard.


Liz Buchanan's character mistakes Hutchinson's Antipholus as her husband during the play. Playing Adriana, who is married to Antipholus of Ephesus, the 23-year-old recently moved to Welland after studying theatre at Sudbury's Laurentian University.

Originally from Canfield
(? that's a new one), just outside Cayuga, Buchanan's first acting experiences with Shakespeare came while in university. She was assistant director for Hamlet and was Stefano in an all-female cast of The Tempest, which was staged outside.

When she saw the audition call for Comedy of Errors, it appealed to her right away.

"There's something nice about doing Shakespeare outdoors," she said. "I'm enjoying it a lot. We've got some interesting characters and that always appeals to me. At first glance, the female characters seem to be one note but there's a lot you can do with them."

Buchanan, who is currently working at the Keefer Mansion Inn in Thorold, said the only challenge she's faced in the production is that everyone is new.

"Everybody has been very welcoming. It's a very fun group, very talented, and that has made it easier," she said.

Buchanan said she has benefited from working with people who have such varying theatre backgrounds.

"A lot of people think Shakespeare is over their head and they won't enjoy it because they think it might be boring, but there's beautiful language and a lot of fun stuff here," she said. "I love Shakespeare and hope everybody gets a chance to enjoy it."


Not bad. I would like to think I answered more eloquently than that, but probably not :P

Just don't be surprised if I don't post the review.

PS- The other good news: normally the prospect of having a brand new actor playing a prinicipal part tht I spend most of my time acting with on stage a week before the show would bother me. In this case I'm thrilled, I have a new Lucianna!

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Toughening up in my young age

Stephie will be pleased, I finally found the x-men parody I was searching for:

Death Becomes Them


Things continue to be insanely up in the air right now, but I made an important discovery this weekend.

Everyone tells you that when you finish University you have to start in the "real" world. The funny thing is, nothing has ever felt more real than the three years I spent in Sudbury at LU or the year I spent in Peterborough at Trent (save perhaps a couple of summers at Lakewood. Sudbury doesn't just feel like home, it feels like life. I also realized, however, that this particular reality I was living for sometime is no longer an option. Something I don't think I even fully realized or considered when I moved. This was not a happy realization
It is scary, but on some level I know that I can take this on, and I know that I can take it on myself. Because I am a little tougher than I give myself credit.

Friday, June 30, 2006

Working Late

There are times when I am less irritated about staying at work a half an hour late. The second day in a row at 7am, however, qualifies as being more irritated. Funny, I have nothing to do at work but blog and kill time for a half an hour. Almost as though 8 hours was exactly enough time for one to accomplish all nightly duties. Maybe I'll go clean the dish washer again (Side-Show-Bobbish shudder and "EwUgh").

:) I will however be on a bus "home" in an hour and a half.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

A Tragical Comical Historical Pastoral of Errors

************

I should clarify (as I suppose not everyone has the entirity of Hamlet memorized): All of the line mess ups that you are about to read are the product of my having a very poor short term memory and a uselessly/frighteningly good long term memory. All lines are some sort of synthesis of my current play A Comedy of Errors and The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark

************

My three saddest line screw-ups of A Comedy of Errors thus far:

1. The line:
Back villain or I will break thy pate across!

What I said:
"Back villain or I will break thy pate across, pluck off your beard and blow it in your face"

2. The line:
That thou art then astranged from thyself. Thyself I call it, for being strange to me... blah blah blah

What I said:
"Thou art then astranged from thyself. Thyself I call it, for to define thyself what is it to but to be... thee? Shit"

...and tonight's

3. The line:
The tongue though not my heart in this shall have his will

What I said:
"My tongue and heart in this be hypocrits"


It's official: my brain is broken.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

"I think it's a joke name sir"

There's a point at which you decide to go by Richard. I entered this guy's name into our data base today and his name is Richard Hack. Trouble is he doesn't go by Richard. He goes by Dick. Actually no, that's not the trouble. The trouble is that his middle initial is W.

*sigh* I find maturity elusive at best...

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Lyrics of the whenever!

I thought I would check out one of the most recent additions to the Lollapalooza line-up, Ben Kweller. I am excited to have come across a song about a girl named Liz!! This is very exciting for me in the nerdiest way possible. It's also a pretty cool tune.

Lizzy

sign me up, i volunteer
votes are in for lifeguard of the year
her feline past lives are plain to see
their similarities are shown in this life again

like mama said, dontcha let it go to your head
when ya know you're being fed
i'm so proud to know you
lizzy, i'll write, i'll sing
telegraph, telegram
telephone, tellin' you
i'll be home soon
dienu

we will wake when kitty licks
and in the morn, work takes her to maine
dressed and out the door by six
tomorrow is the first time liz can't board my plane

like mama said, dontcha let it go to your head
when ya know your book is read
i'm so proud to know you
anna will take me to the port
as liz drives up i-95
me and my darlin' keep love alive
even on texas time

like mama said, dontcha let it go to your head
when your town is painted red
i'm so proud to know you
lizzy, i'll write, i'll sing
telegraph, telegram
telephone, tellin' you
i'll be home soon
dienu

Monday, June 19, 2006

Heart of Darkness

Let's be clear, I'm not anti-soldier. But let's get philisophical for a moment:

"3 U.S. soldiers charged with killing of Iraqis"

I don't even know where to start...

Monty Pyhton's Meaning of Life

Eric Idle: Better than staying at home, eh sir! At
home if you kill someone they arrest you. Here they give you
a gun, and show you what to do, sir. I mean, I killed fifteen
of those buggers sir! Now at home they'd hang me. *Here* they
give me a fucking medal sir!


I'm sorry but when you send thousands of soliders out into the desert with guns and tell them to drop bombs and shoot "evil doers", leave them out there for 3 years while 2500 of them get killed, and cause at least 38,475 casualties as a result of the war... well geez, what a shock, they killed people! Who could have guessed? If only there was some kind of recent historical event that could have warned us that this kind of stuff would happen...
"This isn't Vietnam"

You're right guys. It's worse.


****

A funny story: So I typoed earlier, as anyone who followed the link would have noticed. I love that on any other political blog I would have been bombarded by angry/offensive comments about my "ignorance". Instead I was politely emailed and alerted to my mistake. Sigh. Thanks Joe ;)

Friday, June 16, 2006

Thorold


The city where I work is cooler than I thought. Not only does the name "Thorold" come from the last name of the historical basis for Lady Godiva, but more importantly there is a kissing rock. I understand that the Kissing Rock at Lock 7 is a lucky charm bringing happiness and prosperity to everyone who kisses their love in front of the rock. That's right, I'm not even going to spoil this with cynicism. I think it's kind of sweet.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Blah

You know what would cheer me up...








**************

A blah end to my blah-day:
Characters
Director
Actor
Liz

Director: This is a farce, OK everyone- You don't have to worry about playing it real so much, forget Stanislavski...
Actor: *cough* Liz


I've decided to take this as a compliment.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Upside Down and Sideways

So blogger just posted two things that I SWEAR I saved as drafts rather than published. Seriously, the "woodsy psychoanalytical" thing from Angelo, and the "Last dozen people to comment" thing from Luke. In both cases the material published was... hm... it was better that I took a moment and rethought my posting process. Sometimes things are better left in my head than posted up on the internet.

Also a lot of things are better left in my head when I've just finished working the 11-7 shift. Mayhaps I should turn in for some rest. Good night!



*********

*********

Yes I'm at work, but here's the deal. I got a list of stuff to do last night and worked myself silly trying to get it all done. I stressed that I didn't quite finish everything that I wanted last night and came in early tonight to get it done. Turns out that the To Do list was meant for two nights. It's 2AM and I have nothing to do. This is not terrible, but it will be by 4 or 5AM when I'm ready to sleep.

Two good things about work tonight: 1) I was given the assignment last night to create a database email all of the presidents of various student unions in Ontario so that they can email them about our place in case they're at a conference at Brock University or something. I told them I would probably take care of the SGA personally.

2) I am taking the opportunity to learn about the wine and food here, and more importantly wine and food pairings. I was excited to learn that my favourite cheese in the world pairs perfectly with my favourite wine in the world. Munster cheese and Zinfandale! Somehow I don't think that this makes me cultured, but at least I will learn why. The only unfortunate thing about this is that I am not learning about wine and cheese pairings through trial and error, but rather the books here available on the subject.

Well I think that qualifies as my 15 minutes. Boy did I ever need that break from... whatever I'm going to do to keep myself awake for another 5 hours.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Stephen feels the news at you

Recent graduate? Follow Stephen's Sound Advice on making the leap into the real world:

1. DO: Move Back Home
Your parents paid for college, the least you can do is reward them with your college educated presence. Show them how enlightened you are by rejecting society’s demands that you get your own place. Plus free food and plenty of time to play Halo.

2. DO: Pad your resume. With a few simple key strokes you can turn your GPA from a 1.4 to a 4.1, that will open some eyes. And that summer job: bus boy at the Olive Garden=Goodwill Embassador to Italy.

3.I have one word for you: PLASTICS. Do sign up for as many credits cards as possible. Then max those suckers out. Society doesn’t consider you a real adult until you’re drowning in debt.

4. Don’t go to Europe to find yourself. Who told you that you were there to begin with? (The rest of this can only be appreciated by watching the video)

5. Before you leave for good streak the quad. After you’ve graduated it’s a felony.

And finally...
6. Don’t graduate.
(Hm, not a bad idea... hello grad school!)

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Homerpalooza


Round 4: What saying can help someone in Springfield determine whether or not water is safe to drink?

57 Days! I can totally afford this.
"Are you being sarcastic?"
"I don't even know anymore."

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Goulet!

Yes! I just saw Robert Goulet get his star on Canada's Walk of Fame. Could this weekend get any better? There's four hours left...

Liz BA

For all of the times I've made fun of people at the Oscars who don't know which side of the stage to exit on I sure did freeze up after I got my diploma. Actually I think I was still absorbing the amazing reaction I recieved from our dear madame president after she had caught me off guard. I thought it was supposed to be a quick handshake. Wouldn't you know, she asked me the question every university graduate loves to hear: "So what are you doing now that you've graduated?". I smiled and said "I'm going to be an actor". Anyone that was able to watch the WebCast (yes there was a WebCast) got to see what I thought was the only reaction that topped the girl that walked on stage to get her diploma in her slippers.

Other answers that I wanted to give to "What are you going to do now that you've graduated?":

"I want to be president of Laurentian University"
"I'm going to Disney World"
"I have one word for you: plastics"
"I'm planning on going to the reception afterwards"


*I would also like to note that my inability to find my way off stage after getting the diploma was actually symbolic of my not knowing what direction I'm going in now that I've gotten my degree.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Adaptation

I saw an advertisement that got me thinking (always scary). It was for a new video game: The DaVinci Code. Now some might claim that this is definitive proof that the book does not qualify as literature. I beg to differ, in fact I think that it's high time more famous literary works were made into video games.

The Great Gatsby (with built in driving simulator)
Moby Dick's ESPN Whaling 2006
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (and you thought Mario's magic mushrooms were cool)
Sim City 1984
The Diary of Anne Frank (there are so many WWII video games, and yet I think they're missing a crucial market here)
The Scottish Game (not availabe from Microsoft)
Grand Theft Auto: A Clockwork Orange Edition
Pilgrim RPG
Anne of Green Gables (first person shooter)
Racing game: Brake fast at Tiffany's

That's enough. It's late.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Wax On...

My story begins when I got home from work this afternoon at around 1:30pm. The weather was finally nice enough for shorts and I got this stupid stupid idea. I thought I would try to wax my legs.
Now I know there are many women perfectly capable of doing this. I am just not one of them. I was doing pretty well until I got to a patch just below my knee cap. I stuck the wax on and went to rip.... the wax however decided not to come along. Now this particular wax brand does not wash off with water. In fact applying water to the wax makes it MUCH worse. It comes with this comedically small vile of "Azulene Oil" which removes the excess wax. So I applied the oil and sure enough- the wax remained. A huge clump of it right in the middle of my leg. Well I sure used up the oil and the wax sure did stay there on my leg. I tried damn near everything to get this wax clump off of my knee. I scraped at it (making everything I scraped with unstickably sticky), I tried 3 kinds of soap, several skin lotions, shampoo (which, unlike wax, washes right out), conditioner, hydrogen peroxide, peaunut oil, Nair hair remover (seemed logical), and what finally removed the wax from my leg: 8spf Coppertone sun tan lotion. So anyways, you can add that to your "useful information for leg waxing" (I'm assuming that everyone with a Y chromosome stopped reading at the third sentence).

Anywho, the uber exciting thing these days is my trek up to Sudbury next Friday! Graduation, hoorah! I never thought I would be so excited to see the Super Stack... or Laurentian University. Thorneloe I'm always excited to see (well almost always), but even more so these days. Soon enough!

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Not a Sleep EZ

I had my very first shift at work at the mansion last night. It's pretty damn cool. I don't get to waitress until Friday, but I've learned all of the computer-esque parts of my job. I also discovered that bussing to and from St Catharines is not as simple as I might have imagined it to be. I won't go into any great detail, but suffice it to say my shift finished at 7AM and I didn't get into bed until 9:30AM. A severe lack of sleep has made me a little on the grouchy side. I should do something to improve that...

still... a small price to pay for such a high level of coolness.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Coffee and Sigur Ros

I am training in the art of wakefullness. My first shift at the mansion is an over-night 11pm to 7am shift. While my recent exit from studentdom should have prepared me for keeping these sorts of hours I must confess: I don't manage well without my sleep. So I must get into the habit of staying up at night and, most likely, sleeping in the mornings as shifts and rehearsals will be afternoons/evenings for the most part. I am working my way up to pulling the all nighter, and still being bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
Right now they might have to settle for bushy-eyed and bright-tailed.

PS: Check out the latest edition of the Daily Show's comic The Decider.

Friday, May 19, 2006

You must mean another Liz


Apparently when people told me to relax and that things would work out just fine, they weren't just making that up to shut my yap-hole.
So here's the good news:
1. I got the part of Adriana in A Comedy of Errors with Shakespeare in the Vineyard. It's being done at the Henry of Pelham Winery and is produced by the Niagara Falls Theatre Society. If anyone will be in the Niagara area then it runs July 13-15 and 20-22 at 7pm.
2. I got a job! I am going to be a front desk clerk/hostess/bartender for the Keefer Mansion. A fully restored 19th Century Mansion in Thorold (near St Kitt's). The mansion is beautiful, the atmosphere is ever so cool AND I have been talking with the management about bringing dinner theatre to events there! I may be able to make some money and do some directing/acting while I'm at it.
3. I found out today that despite its absence from the Event Calendar at Cayuga Secondary School, the Baseball Tournament that I started up in high school ran today in memory of Will, Jay, Dayton and Tom. I am sorry that I couldn't attend, but I am so happy that they are still doing this at the school.
4. I just ordered my Lollapalooza ticket, Raconteurs, Death Cab for Cutie, Shins, Flaming Lips, Iron and Wine, Feist, etc etc and more awesome etc, here I come!

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

The Pension Grillparzer

An activity usurped from Angelo-

Instructions:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

from page 123 of The World According to Garp

"Tell the truth," the singer said. "He was born without shinbones. But it's true that we couldn't get along with the Russians."
"They tried to jail the bear," said the dream man.
"Tell the truth," Theobald said.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Blue... no I mean yelloooooooo

Thanks everyone for the questions, here are the answers:


Andrew John Root in a Pythonesque manner charged me not to ignore his questions four.

Question the First: Would you ever try cocaine and under what circumstances?
No. Inhaling anything that way kind of grosses me out. Plus drugs are bad :)


Question the Second: Which island most intrigues you and why?

Madagascar for the lemurs and other fun creatures (I’m an anthropology-nerd). A close second would be the island of Yap, which is part of the Federated States of Micronesia.

Question the Third: What reasons do you have to be smug?

I didn’t realize I was smug. I thought that perhaps if I looked up the exact OED definition of smug I would be less defensive about answering the question. This did not help, BUT I learned that the word smug originates from the German word “smuk” meaning pretty. I am going to smugly assume that that’s what was meant.

Question the Fourth: Name one song, movie, and book you think the world could live without..... ?

I go so far as to say that the world would be a better place without-
Song: Untitled-Simple Plan - I actually wasn’t sure what the title of this song was so I went to a Simple Plan lyrics page looking for "a song about a spoiled brat suburban boy abnoxiously whining about how tough his life is". It took a while to find the particular one I was looking for.
Movie: The Fast and the Furious - I don’t think that movies make people do stupid things, but why encourage this idiotic behaviour
Book: Toss up between The O’Reilly Factor for Kids and How to Talk to a Liberal (if you must): The World According to Ann Coulter. Actually I suspect that that was actually my answer to “Name two people the world could live without”.

Angelo praised my word-verification for being wheelchair accessible, though I think it is actually a parking permit giving his question a space closer to my brain than all of the other questions. His was:

What is one thing you've always wished to say to a loved one but haven't gone through with because it would be deemed inappropriate? You do not need to identify the loved one.

I don’t think there’s any one thing, I don’t really sit on things for very long, and I pick my battles. It’s probably much more the way I word stuff that I would secretly change sometimes when I’m trying to spare someone’s feelings or resolve things for the best. That’s not very exciting is it? Alright, there’s a person I am very close to that I secretly hate and everyday I have to convince myself not wait until they’re asleep at night to go in and smother with a pillow. Sleep tight everyone!


Lizzie V was finally able to leave me a question. I am so sorry Lizzie V, all this time I thought I actually had the function on for people to leave anonymous comments. I always wondered why people told me that they read my blog, but never left a comment. At any rate… Liv asked:

What in your 23 years do you regret doing (or not doing) the most?

Well going to Alberta was not the best decision I ever made, but I’ve stopped actually waking up in the middle of the night from bad dreams and freaking out that I might still be there, so I guess I can see it as a learning experience of sorts. I also probably should have gone on the Europe trip in high school. I could have borrowed the money the extra money I needed, back then $1000 was a lot of money to be in debt.

If you could be any celebrity who would you be and why?

Heh- alright there’s a real answer to this that I probably shouldn’t give, because there’s no way it won’t look bad. I do adore Kate Winslet and I also think Naiomi Watts and Helen Bonham Carter are very talented and beautiful actresses who I wouldn’t mind being for a day or so. I do kind of like being me, though.

You have a choice between 10 million dollars or marrying a now bankrupt Ewan... what do you do?

Marrying Ewan. Contrary to popular belief it is not Ewan’s fame or money that attract me to him. That’s superficial. I think he’s hot and has a really sexy accent and I’ve seen him in a full frontal nude scene, so I am attracted to him in a much deeper way than money and fame.

Here are some questions from Erica (Whom I usually refer to as Erica):

1. When you think of Acting II what is the first thing that comes into your head?

I think the day Sarah made us write those poems and read them out and I suddenly realized what my “wall” was in acting. It was incredibly liberating, and I knew that my real work had only just begun, but it was nice to finally understand what it was going to take to act.

2. If you could go anywhere in the world tomorrow where would you go and how long would you stay?

Great Britain. I’d like to do about a month or so of the whole British Isles. A week in London, Stratford and all those other important English places, a week in Scotland, a week in Ireland and a week in Wales.


3. If you had the opportunity to save Jon Stewart's life and have him indebted to you forever and ever but you first had to be the one to endanger his life would you do it?

I would be too scared that I wouldn’t be able to properly save his life after endangering him. And a world without Jon Stewart might as well not be a world… and it’s likely not to be if the Republicans stay in power…

That was a pretty sour note to end on.

I have a job interview at a really cool place on Monday. I have some very positive vibe from my “ins” there, and it would be a really fun job. I will post more if I get it. No sense getting hyped up.
I also did my audition last night and I think that it went very well. The director gave me some positive feedback and said he would be in touch soon. So a bit of a nervous weekend, but things are finally starting to roll down here. Thanks again for the questions, they were all really good/tricky ones!

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Editted and Re-Editted... did I spell that right?

****************

I'm doing the question thingy. You know, the thingy everyone did months ago? Well I'm doing it now. Leave a question. And I've re-configured it so that those without blogs may question me as well. Yes this is in the absence of real things to write about. Fear not, this will be remedied VERY SOON.

****************

This is the all time low in the history of blogging. I have nothing of value of my own to say, so I've just decided to steal directly from Nissah's blog and put a post of hers on mine.

The wisdom of Nissah:

"Elbows

People, I have something to say. SAY NO TO DRY ELBOWS!!!!!! I was sitting in class and someone next to me had the worse case of dry elbows. Ugh, that just makes me mad! This is why we have lotions and creams people! For the love of God use them! That is all I have to say on that. So the next time you take a shower or a bath, remember to keep those elbows clean and moisturized."

I also learned from her blog that she has a life-long goal to throw a shoe at Bryan Adams. I've had a shoe thrown at me, and I can officially say that it was not a pleasant experience. It was also being thrown at me by a 250lb six foot tall camper screaming curses at me who would later attempt to lock me in a bathroom.
I miss camp.


******************
Due to some complaints about the length of this post, I have removed the quiz. If you wish to know something interesting or obscure about me, you can always leave a question. I will accept until Friday.
******************

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Compy Pentium I

This computer:

Can't play videos
Can't play music/CDs
Is SLOW
Logs me on automatically to web messenger?
Has no space to download ANYTHING
Has word processing but it takes five minutes to start up

I wonder if I replaced it with a cardboard box if anyone would notice...

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

A New Chapter

I am home and settled, and ready to roll. Despite my exit (fade out on rocky landscape, cue music "Move Away and Shine") from the city of Sudbury I will be keeping up this blog, hopefully with some interesting adventures from southern Ontario. Already on the agenda: an audition for a community theatre group, just outside of Welland that is putting on Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors. Also my seemingly endless pursuit to find at least mildly meaningful/bearable employment.

I had a great weekend before I left, and I am infinitely confident that I will have more of those over the summer and in the future with many friends, including three of the most wonderful people I've ever had the privilage of be-friending. Jenny, Andrew and Steph did a lovely job of sending me off from Sudbury including an improv performance for the entire Greyhound bus at the station. The girl sitting beside me noticed me smiling and waving at them as they performed a puppet show with their bare hands.

GIRL: Are they your friends?
ME: Yeah, I'm moving away, we're all just finishing school...
(Steph's hand viciously attacks Andrew's hand and Jenny falls backwards dramatically behind the wall)
ME: ...Theatre school

Keeping reading, and stay in touch!

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Passive Agressive Manipulation

An experpt from the Centre for Nursing Advocacy's analysis of The Nurse by the White Stripes:


"It's true that nurses are professionally obligated to protect their patients. But nurses have had more than enough of their expert care being associated with romantic relationships, a cliche that continues to undermine efforts to have their vital clinical skills recognized. It's also not hard to see some of the male vulnerability that has fueled the battleaxe nurse stereotype here, as the narrator stresses how "helpless," "alone" and "most ill" he is. What man wants to be at the mercy of some "suspiciously dusting" woman at a time like that? ...

The second stanza packs a real anti-nurse wallop, as the "maid you've hired," who's supposed to "mother" you, instead smothers you while you're "most ill." Clearly these roles--nurse, maid, mother--all run together here. But contrary to decades of the kind of handmaiden and maternal stereotyping in "The Nurse," modern nurses are skilled professionals with years of college-level education. A man may need a maid, as Neil Young once suggested, but not for nursing."

The Centre for Nursing Advocacy sent Jack White the Golden Lamp Award for Worst Portrayal of Nursing in the Media 2005:




White responded:



Something tells me this is going to go very badly...

PS: The Nursing Advocacy people titled their article: "Boy you have no faith in Nursing"... personally I think my title was wittier as I didn't make a b-line for the obvious.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

3 Years Later and I still don't get it

I will sleep soon, but first, while my brain is still at its most alert... stupid movie still breaks my brain

Saturday, April 22, 2006

I'm not entirely sure what I just saw


I guess I kind of went in expecting a total fluff piece. When I went to see American Dreamz I was anticipating a sort of P-C slightly to the left amusing movie that kind of ripped on Bush and American Idol and in the end taught us all that "Americans aren't so bad after all, just a little silly". A feel good for Democrats. This was not the case. I actually disagree with a large number of critics who have said that this was fluff with no substance. Firstly, it was not fluffy; it was down-right unpleasant in some parts. Secondly, there was actually a certain amount of substance in the dark dark humour of the film. On some level it was actually quite scathing about American politics and the American way of life.

The thinly veiled look at the Bush presidency was sort of an on-the-side amusement rather than the Daily Show-esque Bush roast I enjoy on a nightly basis. The strangest thing was in typical Hollywood fashion I actually found myself sympathizing and even liking the president. Their president! In the movie! He was just so sad...
That said it was not especially kind to Bush or American foreign policy in its satirization, but it was probably not as harsh as it could have been either.

The movie features a number of hopeful Americans and American TV personalities involved with the hit TV show American Dreamz (aka American Idol). Middle America, corporate America, white trash America and Hollywood, no one is spared in this almost painful look at the American way of life. I think I can summarize it by saying that the the most likeable character... nay the ONLY redeemable character in the film is Omar, a contestant on American Dreamz who is part of a terrorist cell and being sent to blow up the president.

Really dark. Kind of weird. Kind of funny. Wait til it comes to Rainbow.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Momentary Distraction

A miracle has occured. My Beckett essay has reached 8 pages. I may actually finish this tonight! At which point I will be officially finished university. I don't want to get ahead of myself here, and I am not going to comment on the quality of the essay (given that the last essay that I thought I ROCKED I got 72% on... stupid directing), but I think it will be sufficient to pass me in Theatre History II.

And now for the summer... anyone care to indulge me in an overly philisophical Liz-centric conversation about my future? :P

Unrelated: Stephen Colbert just made my night with the word "Bard". Stephen vs. Shakespeare at its finest. I will post the link for the video tomorrow when it's up.

PS: If anyone caught that random rant thing I put up at around 4:30 and took down at around 5:20, please ignore that... I just get like that sometimes. It's all good.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Let the Eagle Soar indeed Mr Ashcroft!

"Oh but Liz, I'm not a crazy. I don't have Ornithophobia like you"
(that's right, it's a real phobia!)

You might call me crazy now, but you haven't seen The Eagle has Loitered. I defy you to watch that and not be at least a little creeped out.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

The A-Z of Me

Thanks for the time-waster Luke!

A = Available?
“For Children’s Parties”?

B = Best Friend(s)?
Jenny, Andrew and Steph

C = Crush?
Ewan McGregor (though at this point I’ll settle for anyone with a good Scottish accent and a field full of daffodils)

D = Dog Names?
Mog

E = Easiest Person To Talk To?
The Rootman

F = Friday or Saturday?
Friday

G = Gummy Bears Or Worms?
bears (sorry Stephen Colbert)

H = Hometown?
Hamilton

I = If You Could Move Would You?
Hm- a better question for me might be “If you should move, would you?”

J = Jesus is?

actually a man named Brian Cohen, part of the People’s Front of Judea

K = Kids?
none that I know of ha ha ha… oh yeah

L = Longest Car Ride?
I think it might have been the night Scott and I got lost in Fisherville…


I have added an M= Most favourite person I stole this quiz from:
Luke!

N = Number Of Siblings

1

O = One Wish?

Three more wishes

P = Phobia(s)
Birds and people biting on fabric

Q = Favorite Quote?
”I hate quotations”-Ralph Waldo Emerson

R = Reason To Smile?
You’re never fully dressed without a smile

S = Song You Last Heard?
The Fraggle Rock theme song (Season 1 DVD)

T = Time You Woke Up?

10ish

U = Unknown Fact About Me?
One thing I used to always want to do (other than be an actress obviously) was be an astronaut. I secretly wanted to do this well into my late teens despite a complete lack of skills in mathematics and physics.

V = Vegetable You Love?
Zucchini

W = Worst Habit?
Saying “What?” and then proceeding to answer because I actually heard exactly what you said. Any time I can do this in combination with opening my mouth to take a breath before I speak you know I am truly at my most absent-minded.

Also added: X = X-Man you would be if you could be one:
Rogue

Y = Yummy Foods?
Quizzno’s Veggie Subs, Cheese Quesidillas and Eggplant Lasagna

Z = Zodiac Sign?

Aries

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Hey, you're that ninja!

So I'm a super nerd and visit the RSC website regularly. They are doing the complete works of William Shakespeare and having some international groups come to present their works:

"New York-based theatre company, Tiny Ninja Theater, performs Hamlet for the first time in the UK using an inch-high cast of small, plastic ninja figurines"

I thought: No this is too good to be true. See for your self. I don't even have words.


Everything's coming up Milhouse!

So I've now had three solid days of eating relatively healthily, getting 7ish hours of sleep/night, going for walks and leisure reading. Not entirely amazing: my mood has significantly improved, I am getting a lot more reading and writing for school done, and I am feeling a lot healthier.
Also on the good news front: I got my apartment rented, so I get my money back!! YAY! In the short term this means more money! I like thinking in the short term. People ask me what I'm doing with my life. I tell them I'll let them know when I figure out what I'm doing in two weeks.

Also, I enjoy being able to pass off reading fun plays as getting school work done :)

Today's indulgence:

Nothing is funnier than unhappiness, I grant you that. ... Yes, yes, it's the most comical thing in the world. And we laugh, we laugh, with a will, in the beginning. But it's always the same thing. Yes, it's like the funny story we have heard too often, we still find it funny, but we don't laugh any more.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

The Tramp's Wisdom

"Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot."

"Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself."

"Live without hope. Live for the moment."

"We think too much and feel too little."

"What do you want a meaning for? Life is a desire, not a meaning."

-Charlie Chaplin, various sources (actually I think they're mostly from Limelight)

Monday, April 10, 2006

Ten days late, but...

Borrowed from Angelo, as a momentary distraction:

Go to Wikipedia. Type in your birth date (but not year). List three events that happened on your birthday. List two important birthdays and one interesting death. Post this in your journal.

Events
1889 - The Eiffel Tower is inaugurated.
1918 - Daylight Savings Time goes into effect in the United States for the first time.
1967 - Jimi Hendrix burns his guitar for the first time at London's Astoria Theatre. He is sent to the hospital afterwards for burns on his hands. Sweet!

Important Birthdays
1948 - Al Gore, Vice President of the United States
1971 - Ewan McGregor, Scottish actor (for those who doubted that it was meant to be)

Important Death
I defy someone to beat this for depressing birthday-death:
1945 - Anne Frank, German-born diarist (b. 1929)

Friday, April 07, 2006

Study Break


Name a famous author who has kissed more boys than Lisa.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Lovely timing by the Colbert Report

On the off chance that you saw my directing class project and perhaps thought that I was exaggerating with the posters in the clinic watch Stephen Colbert's Balls for Kidz. Yes that's what it's called.

Be there or be square

Tonight the directing class students are presenting their final projects. Mine is a play called "The Most Massive Woman Wins" starring Jenny Hazelton, Sarah Gartshore, Nissah Slyke (shoot I better make sure I'm spelling that right) and Lindsay Wye. They are doing beautifully under ridiculous circumstances. I gave them the script two weeks ago and in that time have asked them to memorize the lines and find dimensions to four very complex female characters in emotional turmoil. I couldn't have asked for a better cast to tackle these difficult parts.

Also showing tonight:
Miss Stephanie Woolger's scenes from Stop Kiss
Mr Andrew Root's stage adaptation of Charlie Chaplin's Limelight
and Mr Torren Sylvain's unique staging of Variations on the Death of Trotski

It should be an excellent evening!

Saturday, April 01, 2006

No one who speaks German could be an evil man...

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility..


As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".


In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.


The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.


There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.



In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.


Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.


Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.


By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".


During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.


Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.


Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

Friday, March 31, 2006

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Alone, by Maya Angelou


Alone

Lying, thinking
Last night
How to find my soul a home
Where water is not thirsty
And bread loaf is not stone
I came up with one thing
And I don't believe I'm wrong
That nobody,
But nobody
Can make it out here alone.

Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.

There are some millionaires
With money they can't use
Their wives run round like banshees
Their children sing the blues
They've got expensive doctors
To cure their hearts of stone.
But nobody
No, nobody
Can make it out here alone.

Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.

Now if you listen closely
I'll tell you what I know
Storm clouds are gathering
The wind is gonna blow
The race of man is suffering
And I can hear the moan,
'Cause nobody,
But nobody
Can make it out here alone.

Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.


Sometimes I lose sight of how not alone I am.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Jesus had skills, like nunchuck skills

I wouldn't want a round house kick to the face by anyone wearing this.

Don't ask how I found this...let's call it a strange pilgrimage to find amusing Christian T-Shirts instead of finishing my homework.

There's these two as well:
(Something tells me the Christian apparel companies that produced these aren't seeing the irony that I am)









PS: I renamed this post several times.
Alternative titles:
"My Wildest Dreams Have Come True"
"The Stupidest T-Shirt I've Ever Seen (Napeolean, like anyone could ever know that)"
"The Happy Nails Club"
and "Pedro will save you"

Thursday, March 23, 2006

"People without imagination shouldn't go to the theatre"

What a great line from Our Country's Good which has really come around, the Acting I class should be commended. I was worried that it was actually going worse than the Acting I workshop last year, but everyone managed to refrain from crying out "God save me" unnecissarily.

A huge thank you to my sound op, Andrew Jack Root, for his help and for keeping me company- even if he didn't get credit in the program.




In "A Streetcar Named Marge" what is the name of the child care centre Maggie is sent to?
BONUS: What role does Lionel Hutz have in the play?

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

A course of impious stubbourness...



I guess I just remember very well.


Not forgotten and still missed.
Thank you Will. YOU were the one that changed my life.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Kind of like writing a Shakespeare essay...

Lovingly stolen from someone I know quite well.

Here are the rules:

Get an iPod, media player, mix CD, or anything else that randomly selects songs for you. Answer these questions based on the songs that come out of them. What do these songs tell you about yourself?

This is the strangest mix of completely ridiculous and disturbingly accurate songs for these questions.

How does the world see me?
Song: White Moon
Artist: The White Stripes
Comments: Apparently much like Rita Hayworth. This would bode well for my acting career, but I understand she was shy when she was not acting.

Will I have a happy life?
Song: Human Behaviour
Artist: Bjork
Comments: Elusive. Pretty accuarte about my current state of happiness. People can drive me nuts sometimes, but oh to get involved in the exchange of human emotion...

What do my friends really think of me?
Song: The Muppet Show Theme
Artist: The Muppets
Comments: I almost clicked for the next song after laughing a little that this one even came up. But hey- we all share the same dream, and that makes us kind of like a family

Do people secretly lust after me?
Song: Someday You Will Be Loved
Artist: Death Cab for Cutie
Comments: heh... yeah... stupid quiz-thingy thinks it's so smart...

How can I make myself happy?

Song: Isobel
Artist: Bjork
Comments: The answer is pretty much what I thought: a blacklight puppet show.

What should I do with my life?
Song: Eskimo
Artist: Damien Rice
Comments: Clearly I'm going to live in an igloo and ice-fish.

Why is life full of so much pain?
Song: You Talk Way Too Much
Artist: The Strokes
Comments: As guilty as I am of this, people would probably be a lot happier if we listened to each other a lot more, and talked a lot less.

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Song: Thank You Jack White For The Fiber-Optic Jesus That you Gave Me
Artist: The Flaming Lips
Comments: I... um... why... I guess a fiber-optic Jesus. Or Jack White.

Will I ever have children?
Song: Cinders and Smoke
Artist: Iron and Wine
Comments: Perhaps I won't have children but I'll be like a parent looking after someone else's kids.

Will I die happy?
Song: Brian Wilson (live)
Artist: The Barenaked Ladies
Comments: Evidently not.

What is some good advice for me?

Song: With God on Our Side
Artist: Bob Dylan
Comments: God's not on your side. And the US isn't always right.

What is happiness?

Song: In My Life
Artist: The Beatles
Comments: Being happy where you are when you're there, but never forgetting what meant a lot to you in your past.

What is my favourite fetish?
Song: Purple Haze
Artist: Jimi Hendrix
Comments: Well, he did have long hair and played the guitar!

How will I be remembered?

Song: Who Are You?
Artist: The Who
Comments: ... this quiz thingy is over.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

I've been drinking.... but not that much... so here's what I think

I run the lights for the funnest play ever. Nay, the BEST play ever. So excellent a play that is to any other play, hyperion to a satyr.

Man it's amazing how nearly a month's worth of (near) mental collapse feels so completely worth it right this second now. When I'm waking up at 6:30 to get the bus to Thorneloe early to scrub the stage floor that everyone's just going to muck up with their shoes anyways, I wonder "Why in heaven's name am I doing this?", but then I see from the lighting booth my friends... Luke, Steph and Andrew especially, acting their hearts out and really creating art. Tonight is the night when it all feels worth it, and I remember why I love theatre so much.

I will never forget this production. If you are reading this and have not already, please come and see this play, it is amazing.
They are the best actors in the world, either for tragedy, comedy, history, pastoral, pastorical-comical...

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

A little late but...



I found this really amusing. Not amusing enough to buy the T-Shirt, but amusing.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

No I will not calm down!

Alright, so let's just say that I haven't been... tranquil as of late. I am sure that fatigue and stress have played a role, but I try not to make excuses. And for the most part I'm sorry that I have been so ill tempered lately. But tonight when my theatre program and current production was being insulted by a certain theatre student who shall remain nameless I got a little upset.
Now perhaps I didn't need to raise my voice or become angry, but quite frankly this guy has had it coming for a while. At any rate, I didn't get a chance to really take my rage out on him because I was apparently upsetting some people with my tone of voice, so my apologies to the blogging community, but a mini-rant was necissary. Fuck people who think that they know everything and that they are too good for Thorneloe! Fuck them right in the ear!



Actually... I feel really good all of a sudden. :)

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Facts and figures

When I was five: I talked a kid in my neighborhood into getting on the bus and going to school on the first day.

My mother told me: To keep centred.

There's this girl I know who: never fails to amaze me

I lost: my sanity over the past week.

Last night: I remember surprisingly well given the circumstances.

Once I dreamt: that I had gotten a bunch of work finished. I was really dissappointed when I woke up.

When I listen to music: I think about a story or a scene from my life as if it were a movie.

Last time I was drunk: I was very lady like maintaining my honour and dignity, and did not say anything embarassing or stupid to anyone, nor did I kiss anyone I probably shouldn't have. At least that's what I remember from last night... that's right... right?

Days until my birthday: 19 :D

If I was a character written by Shakespeare I'd be: female- Viola, male- Horatio

By this time next year: I will be just fine at whatever I'm doing, wherever I am.

I have a hard time understanding: My own though processes.

You know I like you if: I say as much.

If I won an award, the first person I'd thank is: Stephanie Woolger, as promised.

Take my advice: this above all- to thine ownself be true, and it must follow as the night the day thou canst not then be false to any man.

My ideal breakfast is: A Buddha Omlette with a fruit cup and flax bread toast

If you visit my hometown: you must be lost. There can't be a good reason you're there.

Why won't anyone: smack some sense into me.

I'd stop my wedding if: Dustin Hoffman ran up to the window and started banging on it shouting "Elaine!" "Elaine!"... who wouldn't?

The world could do without: birds.

My favourite blonde is: Scott ;)

Paper clips are more useful than: beads when making necklaces

And by the way: I much prefer the phrase "by the by".

The animals I would like to see flying besides birds (this is asuming I want birds to fly) are: A whole circus of animals... particularly of the Monty Python variety.

Random fact: Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.

I secretly: lied on pretty much every "truth" answer for spin the bottle last night. Sorry.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Am I?

Your Personality Profile

You are sexy, powerful, and bold.
You're full of passion and energy...
Sometimes this passion has a dark side.

You feel most alive when you're seducing someone.
You never fail to get someone's attention.
Quick minded, you're also quick to lose your temper!

Friday, March 10, 2006

Sleep rock my brain

Sorry guys, posting has been particularily low on my priorities list as of late. Here's something to tide you over:



This is clearly the only thing that would make our amazing production more amazing... you know elevate it from a 9.3 to a 9.7 (for Claudius).

HAMLET
March 16-19 at Thorneloe University Theatre
Come see it!

Saturday, March 04, 2006

No Comments?

Oh man, my blog attendence might actually be worse than I thought... and to think I was going to post naked pictures of myself. Well, I guess since no one's reading there's really no point. Guess I'll just keep posting random stupid crap to amuse myself.

Friday, March 03, 2006

An audience poll

I will post when I have something of value to say. In the meantime... who is reading this? I mean I know a couple of you, but Andrew already has to listen to every dippy thought that comes out of my head most days anyways, and I'm worried Angelo won't comment any more because of my enjoyment of the movie Crash. Please comment :)

Not a complete change in subject I suppose:

An approximated script of a humourous phone conversation from two nights ago-

Steph: I want you to play a patient in the hospital who has a dependent personality disorder. You are very clingy and needy. You depend on other people's praise for your own self confidence and seek others approval before you do anything. You're very indecisive and weak willed.

Liz: You can be committed for that?!

Sunday, February 26, 2006

The Aptly Named Sitcom

After an night of pizza, X-Men, I Heart Huckabees, 3AM Star Wars and what was supposed to be work on our scene for Aminta I feel that I should plug Torren's band again. The Sitcom is pretty cool, as is Mr Sylvain for hosting our "rehearsal".
As if they played a gig in the middle of Value Village!

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Down with Love

It's official. I'm in love.
Ewan McGregor plays the guitar.
Nissah informed me tonight that she has seen a video of him playing and singing. Apparently his hair isn't that long, but he has some serious scruff going on.
He now officially occupies spot #1 on the Celebrity crushes list.


You see many people are confused. When he says "I will marry you" a lot of people think he's saying "Sandra Templeton", when in fact he is saying "Liz Buchanan".
We just spell and pronounce our names differently.

I am off to bed now... perchance to dream...

Monday, February 20, 2006

Go Canada Go!


Congradulations to the Canadian Women's Hockey team! It was an exciting game, and they made Canada proud.

Congradulations to the Swedish team as well. They played very hard and held their own.

Maybe with the increased international competition we can see more women's hockey on TV. It's the most fun I've had watching hockey in years, and not just because we won.
The Canadian Women are very fast and agressive and play with a lot of heart, something the NHL has less and less of every day. But that's another post for another day.

Way to go Team Canada!

Lists

This wasn't one of those survey-post this on your blog- thingys. As will soon be obvious, this is just the random junk that has burst out of my head tonight... in lists:

Biblical names that don't seem to be as popular for new borns:
-Ham
-Judas
-Abel
-Jezebel
-Goliath
-Lucifer
-Esau

Things I tried to do last night (after The Grand with Erica), that I should not do under the influence of Alexandre Keith's:
-blog (thankfully my senses over-powered my temptation to hit the publish button)
-write poetry
-go through my Hamlet script and cross out various lines and replace them with dialogue from Star Wars
-watch "Drop Zone" (actually this shouldn't be done under ANY circumstances)

Thoughts on current events:
-cartoons don't hurt anyone... that's what VPs are for
-seriously though people, they're just cartoons
-am I a bad Canadian? I'm sorry I just can't help but cheer for the underdogs. The Women's Hockey team has my back, but I was kind of pleasantly amused about Switzerland and Finland against the men

The Next 3 songs that are on my WM playlist:

-Cannonball, Damien Rice
-Someday you will be loved, Death Cab for Cutie
-Not a Pretty Girl, Ani DiFranco

-I think I am going to follow this up with "The Rainbow Connection" for good measure... and happier dreams

Saturday, February 18, 2006

The Trash Heep Has Spoken

As I ran backstage (aka behind some plastic trees into the corner) to change from Hansel and Gretel's mother into the evil witch, because only three and a half performers showed up for our show today, I started to think about what was wrong with children's entertainment these days.

Oh no- I just said "these days".

I think it's too bad that a lot children's entertainers feel the need to talk down to kids. It's great to be big and goofy and dramatic to get your point across, but you don't need to dumb things down. Kids are pretty quick, and I think they learn more if you expect more out of them.

Consider that your wisdom for the day.

Friday, February 17, 2006

The Cutest darn Cab of Death

I have recieved a most wonderful of Valentines Day presents:


Thanks Mom! (I also got "Fever to Tell" by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs)

I'm not claiming to have been any more exhausted lately than the rest of the academic community, or even a whole lot more emotionally drained, but it was sure nice to get a Valentines Day present from my Mom. I'm not even that crazy jealous that she's on a cruise ship relaxing right now... mostly. Well she deserves it anyways!
Everyone enjoy your reading week (those of you that actually have one), and try not to "read" too much.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

How to dismantle an atomic blog

Stealing the lyric of the week idea. I guess this is more like a "two verses and chorus of the week", but here it is:

Tough, you think you've got the stuff
You're telling me and anyone
You're hard enough

You don't have to put up a fight
You don't have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

Listen to me now
I need to let you know
You don't have to go it alone

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Round two



What is Ralph's "pick up line" when he walks Lisa home from school?

Bonus: Which American president served only 30 days of his term before dying in office?

Friday, February 10, 2006

Top 10

I can't believe it took me this long to realize that I could use my blog to post my top 10 Simpson's episode list.




10. Marge vs The Monorail
9. "Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala (Annoyed Grunt) cious"
8. The Boy Who Knew Too Much
7. Das Bus
6. A Star is Burns
5. 22 Short Films About Springfield
4. Cape Feare
3. Lisa the Vegetarian
2. Rosebud
1. Grandpa vs Sexual Inadequesy


Simpson's Trivia challenge:

Who is the famous person for whom Alison creates the anagram "Geniune Class"?

*Bonus: Anyone that can think of an anagram for Jeremy Irons. It has been bugging me for a decade.

Foursomes

FOUR JOBS I'VE HAD:
1. Subway Sandwich Artist
2. Tim Horton's Coffee Hostess
3. SARS Screener
4. Easter Seals Camp Counsellor

FOUR MOVIES I CAN WATCH OVER AND OVER:
1. The Iron Giant
2. All 3 Monty Python movies
3. Star Wars Episodes 3-6
4. Big Fish
(alright, that was definatly cheating)

FOUR PLACES I HAVE LIVED:
1. Hamilton
2. York
3. Peterborough
4. Sudbury

FOUR TV SHOWS I LOVE:
1. The Daily Show
2. South Park
3. Clone High
4. Hockey Night in Canada (for non-betting purposes)

FOUR OF MY FAVOURITE DISHES:
1. Vegetarian Quesidillas
2. Quizno's Veggie sub
3. Egg Plant Lasagna
4. the Cauliflower and Cheese stuff my mom makes+Dad's Ceasar Salad

FOUR PLACES I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:
1. Hawaii
2. Australia
3. Mexico
4. Pretty much anywhere warm

FOUR FAVOURITE QUOTES FROM THE SIMPSONS:
1. "Duffman can't die, only the actors who play him!"-Duffman
2. I was trying not to do any repeats, but this one HAS to go in:
"Mom! Mom! I got gum in my hair!"
"Are you sure it's not shampoo? Because that washes right out." - Lisa & Marge Simpson
3. "Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog."
"Really?" "Actually, replace 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly' and replace 'dog' with 'son'"- Lionel Hutz and Marge
4. "Lets just say it moved me. To a bigger house! Oh crap, I said the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud." -Krusty the Clown

OK- I have changed this list 3 times now. I must stop or I will be here all night... wait a moment... that give me an idea...

"Go Away"
"Here's a Better Sign Dad" ("See the Elephant $2 Ride the Elephant $5")
"I don't have time to read it, just give me the general gist of it"

Thursday, February 09, 2006

In the Noh

I'm trying to contain myself. We are doing a workshop production of Tasso's Aminta, an Italian Renaissance pastoral play, and we are using different styles for each scene. One of my scenes is being done in the style of Japanese Noh Theatre. I am getting a fan and a kimono and everything! I will have to repeat this mantra of happiness to get me through today. Now off to the cafeteria to find vegetarian food, or more likely a lack thereof :(

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

I would not could not kill a king, I would not poison anything

Froid's Edible complex: Realizing that you can't eat Hamlet because the play is rotten.

Seems as logical as anything we do in Shakespeare class. The articles we're using to discuss theories about the plays all have essentially the same theme, none of which have brought me any closer to understanding the stories, characters or language of Shakespeare than I was before I started the class.

Hmmm, should I make this one a new historical work, or a pycho-sexual feminist play?

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Hot Chocolate and Ifs

There's a cold breeze in my apt, and I can't figure out where it's coming from.
#$%&! it's cold! I'm off to grab some hot chocolate.

In the meantime...

If I were a month I would be: March
If I were a day of the week I would be: Wednesday
If I were a time of day I would be: 1:37 (anyone that gets that reference gets 10000 bonus points)
If I were a planet I would be: Mars ("to get more chocolate bars")
If I were a sea animal I would be: a manitee (I used to sponsor a manitee in Florida)
If I were a direction I would be: east
If I were a piece of furniture I would be: a big comfy chair
If I were a sin I would be: Gluttony (incidently a part I won an award at the Sears drama festival)
If I were an historical figure I would be: Socrates
If I were a liquid I would be: green tea
If I were a tree, I would be: A maple tree. (Go Leafs Go!)
If I were a flower/plant: an orchid
If I were a kind of weather, I would be: right before it rains
If I were a musical instrument, I would be: a xylophone
If I were an animal, I would be: a Lizard
If I were a color, I would be: red
If I were a vegetable, I would be: a brussel sprout
If I were a sound, I would be: a B-min chord on an accoustic guitar
If I were an element, I would be: Germanium. Ask me to tell you about Germanium sometime, using sock puppets.
If I were a car, I would be: a 1964 Ford T-Bird
If I were a song, I would be: "The Rainbow Connection"
If I were a movie, I would be directed by: Terry Gilliam
If I were a book, I would be written by: John Irving
If I were a food, I would be: a strawberry
If I were a place, I would be: Greece
If I were a material, I would be: polyester
If I were a taste, I would be: bitter sweet
If I were a scent, I would be: vanilla
If I were a word, I would be: perplexed
If I were an object, I would be: a garden gnome
If I were a body part I would be: just above the cheek bone in the outer corner of the eye
If I were a facial _expression I would be: amused
If I were a cartoon character I would be: Joan from Clone High
If I were a shape I would be a: square
If I were a number I would be: 14
If I were a disease I would be: a gold rush era disease. Like dysentary

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

A Budding Physicist

Now some will claim that I overheard the answer from Michael Emond at rehearsal this evening, but to be clear, I had not attempted the riddle yet and I pursued the riddle from a totally logic based stand-point: thus I did not rule out certain possibilities on the basis that I knew what the final answer was. I managed to work out the owner of each house and each owner's characteristics, and thus I would have been able to solve the riddle without Emond's help. Having the mental capacity to do so apparently classifies me as one of the top 2% smartest people in the world.

I would like to say that if this is true... the world is screwed. Totally screwed.


Albert Einstein’s Riddle

Are you in the top 2% of intelligent people in the world? Solve the riddle and find out.

There are no tricks, just pure logic, so good luck and don’t give up.

1. In a street there are five houses, painted five different colours.
2. In each house lives a person of different nationality.
3. These five homeowners each drink a different kind of beverage, smoke a different brand of cigar and keep a different pet.


The question: Who owns the fish?

Answer:

1. The Brit lives in a red house.
2. The Swede keeps dogs as pets.
3. The Dane drinks tea.
4. The green house is on the left of the white house.
5. The owner of the green house drinks coffee.
6. The person who smokes Pall Mall rears birds.
7. The owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill.
8. The man living in the centre house drinks milk.
9. The Norwegian lives in the first house.
10. The man who smokes Blends lives next to the one who keeps cats.
11. The man who keeps horses lives next to the man who smokes Dunhill.
12. The man who smokes Blue Master drinks beer.
13. The German smokes Prince.
14. The Norwegian lives next to the blue house.
15. The man who smokes Blends has a neighbour who drinks water.

Albert Einstein wrote this riddle early during the 19th century. He said that 98% of the world’s population would not be able to solve it.